First of all, you are going to spark the AI uprising by subjecting bots to 1000 hours of this shit, and we will have deserved it.

Second, why is your bot better at writing comedy than SNL

NEWS PIG

We’re about two weeks away from hearing “The President doesn’t exist.”

I chuckling so hard rn

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ That scene with Thunderstruck by ACDC

AWWWW SHIT THIS IS SO GOOD.

AMEN TO THAT

Yup. Perfect

A little boy announced that I am his best friend, said, “That means you can touch my hair, if you want!”, grabbed my hand, and placed it on his head.

My son. My son.

art

This is my fucking favorite thing I’ve ever seen I’m sobbing

I thought the baby was copying them, but its actually the other way around and now I’m cackling. This is stupid cute.

This video clip has watered my crops and cleansed my angry soul!

a smol choreographer

the Sora commission I did from stream the other day! for @espressobuns , thank you 🙏 

Xion

i just want to draw her suddenly…

#formyGregory #KingdomHeartsForever

#bucky barnes deserves better #give my baby some rest

Oh, baby boy. My sweet beautiful sensitive Bucky. ❤💛💚💙💜

setup and punchline

The artist is luo li rong

The statue doesn’t have big enough titties to have been made by a man.

I know I’ve reblogged this before but the schadenfreude is too delicious.

By the way, the statue is called  La mélodie oubliée (The Forgotten Melody). Luo Li Rong also painted it:

And here she and the statue are in a more formal setting (museum or art show, I can’t tell):

“Dork ass losers”

OK not only do I think she’s a sorceress but now I have a massive crush on her

10 Star Trek AOS Characters Ranked From Best to Worst

15. Obviously

14. It

13. Would 

12. Be

11. Illogical

10. To 

9. Rank

8. Them

7. All

6. Because

5. They 

4. Are

3. All

2. Amazing

1. Bones

“The US’ largest association of physicians will advocate for LGBT-inclusive family leave policies, reported Human Rights Watch. The US, which has one of the worst maternity policies in the world, offers just twelve unpaid weeks of leave for new parents.”

Read the full story here

For more #LGBTQ family stories and parenting news, check out our monthly news roundup!

hmmm

Me. IRL

Chris Hemsworth responds to an interview question by Flexing Bicep

The arm porn is real.

“Against all authority… Except my mom”

This is too pure

Alignment: Chaotic*.

* conditions apply

John McCain’s son, Jack McCain, responds to racists who took “offense” to the Old Navy interracial family advertisement.

Can we also talk about how that woman said “you couldn’t get a white woman”, like white women are the tip top of the racial scale and are a prize to be had. Basically insinuating Black Women are sloppy seconds #NotHereForIt. Great clapback, Jack. Classy and to the point.

HEADS UP: I just went through his wife’s Twitter and she’s literally an angel sent from heaven!

You should check it out @reneeitchka on Twitter ❤️

Autistic NY Black teen gets lost running 5K, assaulted by a white man who’s afraid of getting mugged.

For more than two years, Clarise Coleman faithfully attended every track practice and every cross-country meet for her son, Chase.

A few weeks ago, Chase, who is a nearly nonverbal autistic child, was running in a meet in Rochester, New York, with his team from Corcoran High School - was assaulted by a stranger in the middle of a race.

Coleman was waiting for him at a part of the course where runners would come down a hill but he didn’t appear and she went looking for him. She was shouting his name and then she started to meet people who pointed in the direction of her son. One of them said:

“I see a grown man, who is quite tall and fairly heavy … exit the vehicle and give this young man a shove that puts him back 10 feet and flat on his butt. Like, just shoved him across the road. The kid didn’t seem to be doing anything but standing there, obviously had nothing in his hands and weighed all of 130 pounds. This guy was easily twice that.”

This tall white guy was a 57-year-old man named Martin MacDonald who told the police that the reason he attacked the Black kid was he thought Chase was going to mug his wife and take her purse.

“My son is a minor. [MacDonald is] a grown man,” Coleman said she told police. “He put his hands on my son. Of course I want to press charges.”

However the police was deaf and on Oct. 21, Rochester City Court Judge Caroline Morrison sent a letter to the Colemans that shocked them: 

She had denied their warrant application, and MacDonald would not be charged for second-degree harassment.

Now the autistic Black boy refused to go to practices and skipped running in his last meet of the season. He turned his running uniform in to his coach, who gently encouraged him to change his mind. Chase refused.

“We just keep telling him, ‘You didn’t do anything wrong. Chase is good. There are mean people and there are nice people and this person was just a mean person,’ ” Coleman said. “We just keep apologizing to him that happened. Especially me. I kept apologizing to him that I couldn’t keep him safe.” 

The attack deeply traumatized him and he lost one of the few things that gave him a sense of pride and belonging.

Please, make a shout out to this outrageous accident! The white man still didn’t receive any punishment for ruining life of the Black boy. THIS IS HELL!

#StayWoke #BlackChildrenMatter #WhitePrivilege

Every reblog that includes Martin MacDonald in it is another web page to help make sure that when you google Martin MacDonald’s name, it’s in connection with child abuse and racism.

#Martin McDonald