WHALE - OIL - BEEF - HOOKED

The Eddie Izzard Doctrine

Perfectly worded.

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Don’t trust morning you. Morning you is a dick. Morning you would sell your loved ones if it got them 5 minutes of extra sleep

maybe morning me wouldn’t be such a dick if that flaky bitch evening me had gone to bed instead of tumblring til butts oclock int he morning

Well evening me might have fallen asleep at a reasonable hour if that dumbass afternoon me hadn’t lain down for a “little nap” that lasted four hours.

I hope no one lowkey hates me. Highkey hate me. Hate me with every fiber of your being. Go big or go home

c’mon yellowstone national park let’s get sickening 

this wins over other pro-gay commercials because you had no idea he was gay and then you can’t tell which one is his husband

they are showing them as people

not as gays and straights

fuckin love this commercial

can we just talk abotu the fact that the husbands arent even bringing the drinks over theyre just standing there next to the drinks and chatting

fuckin useless husbands

they are showing anyone can be useless. Even gay people

they are saying that it doesn’t matter if you are gay or straight. You can still be a useless person

this post got better

bring her back

What a spoiled child. <3

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*floop flop*

Make it a good one, kids.