got no fame & got no aim

poor bastard… looks like the perp slapped his balls clean off

*bully voice* you will NEVEEER look like your animal crossing character. you will never have a perfectly round head and a little red triangle for a nose

Summers of the past 🍯

Me: *screenshots thingns my girlfriend said to me so i can read it again later* Me: yeah im not gay

Dude no offense, I don’t want go sound like an sjw or anything, but if you have you have a girlfriend you’re straight. That’s just how it works.

Im a girl

What the fuck

those westerns finally make sense now. it’s like honey i’m going into town. i’ll pick up sugar, flour, beans, salt pork, bullets, and kerosene. do you want a bolt of calico? some maple syrup? i’m taking the wagon i’ll be back in three days

The number of messages I’ve failed to answer across all my devices and media platforms will be weighed against my soul on judgment day, and I will be cast into hell

imagine ur getting jumped by flat earthers and one of them say fuck it take him to the edge

you already know what it is

new decade new milfs lets get it fellas

born to eat cheese forced to work

watching this 2h documentary on the history of half life and this dude takes a break in the middle of arizona to talk about one time he did magic shrooms backstage at a comedy club and thought he was having an auditory hallucination where he kept hearing the hl1 scientist voice talking to him only to peek at the stage google the guy on it and find out it was the original VA for kleiner doing a bit at the same club

Moonrise, Part III

Joshua Tree National Park, California

March 2017