incredibly brave of me to get through the days

the holy trinity

hmmm

this test apparently tells you how narcissistic you are on a scale of 0 - 40. most people are under 20…i got a 35 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

LGBT stands for Lets Guillotine Billionaires Together

what is a rival if not a crush ur mad about having

don’t play with my head like this

Demons are usually depicted as red to indicate that they're heavily seasoned with paprika and chili powder, like a chorizo.

star trek where everything’s the same but instead of saying “fascinating” Spock says “wild”

Don’t like it? Become God

yes!!! I’m high maintenance!! I don’t feel particularly interested in living a placid life, holding back on my opinions + preferences. there’s nothing to admire about that. I love detail and emotion and moods. I have standards. I have presence. I want everything this world has to offer! bite me.

you don’t have to be boring and timid and passive to be well-liked, I promise. if you have compassion and empathy, it’s enough. I swear to you. you can still be lovable even if you take some space for yourself.

I wish I could terrorize ancient people with things that are commonplace today

releasing a roomba into the greek forums

what i say: I’m fine

what i’m thinking: Griffin McElroy writing an entire backstory on the invention of the elevator into the events of the Adventure Zone solely to spite listeners who told him he couldn’t put elevators into his dnd campaign is the modern day equivalent of CS Lewis making the lamppost a center element of his Narnia series just so he could piss off JRR Tolkien who said that no good fantasy book would have a lamppost in it

A child eating a cake in the middle of the night is having a great time. An adult eating a cake in the middle of the night is having a terrible time.

It’s only fanfic if it’s from the Fanfique region of France. Otherwise it’s just sparkling pornography.