People Vs. People To Stand Among People.

Given that this era is given for the millennials, there’s nothing bad about it, except for one thing that I have noticed this past few days — everyone is trying to stand out, through the means of doing what others do too. I know you can do better, but it doesn’t mean it makes you extraordinary.

People nowadays tend to crack shells using the same elements that cover has. They always do this because it flows together with the mainstream. Most people do video blogs because most people do video blogs. Most people eat at Jollibee because most people eat at Jollibee. One thing that you’ll start to observe is they’re not even trying to choose the other option, because what they think is the hype is always superior.

I blend in for fun, I blend in just so people could recognize me as a normal being, but I do not blend in just so I could engage on an impact and kill fire with fire. I negate all elements and that’s one of my many secrets as a human being. 

I was prompted to write this blog/editorial post because these “we are born to stand out” yada yadas trigger me in a way because why the heck not? These people are not standing out, yet, they’re all the fuching same. They can’t hack the most critical part of the wall. They always tend to break the harder portion.

People, if you are reading this, let me tell you something. You literally are born to stand out. Do not follow the mainstream, and walk the land beside it. You may not get there fast, but you’ll still be able to reach your goal without competence. Be the one who takes the longer cut instead of taking the jammed shortcut. Be the one who thinks 11+1 is better than 6+6. Be the one who takes the other option. You’ll get there, I promise.

If you don’t want to fail another relationship, do not choose someone whose looks are out the charts. Choose someone whose characteristics are great and are far different from the others.

We all have this thing upon finding our partners, we always look at their assets and we fall in love with those. Beautiful eyes, sexy butt, big boobs, abs and jawlines. What I think the most attractive part of any individual is their inner uniqueness. If someone gives you all the attention you need, gives you more than you need and looks at you like he or she sees you as someone who is larger than his/her world, he/re is more likely a husband/wife material. Doesn’t matter how he/she looks like, as long as your future is way better than his/her looks, then you’re good to go.

I admit it, I have a very attractive girlfriend, and I find her really cute/beautiful since the day I laid my eyes on her, knowing me, I really am not into faces. But I did not like her because she is. I liked her because we share these traits that are hard to find, we see each other as unique pieces of Eden, we love each other because we care a lot about each other, and we’re bonded together because what we feel is real, and our souls have been dating longer than our current relationship record. 

The secret to making these relationships last is not about making it last; it’s all about how you made it grow until you officially committed yourselves into each other. 

If you think he/she is still as great as the day you met him/her, then you’re doing great!

There are lots of reasons why I don’t speak out too much, but mind you, when I speak, it contains pureness and transparency. 

I have not been speaking about this to you, each and everyone who are involved in this post, but I will speak out the full truth, since I’ve kinda lost some of my will to live(As long as Renee is there, I could still manage to live. I love her so much.)and I am thinking about these thoughts overnight. My exhaustion sang me to sleep and I woke up anxious.

First of all, to Renee ( @nightmarishnightingale ) I would love to say I love you. I’ve been thinking about stuff like failing my only second year subject, but I do hope I become okay. At most times, I’ve been like this; I didn’t want to leave you, and part ways with you. I’m so crazy and I can’t even take my eyes off you. Honestly, I’ve been watching proposal videos because these videos are my indulgence, they make me cry and they make me think about our marriage, and how I am supposed to give you a surprise proposal very soon.

I’ve also been thinking. I’ve always thought that I lack effort. I know you were saying that I’m doing everything, but I still think I lack it. Hindrances and obstacles stop me from doing what I would passionately do for you, but I want you to know that I’m doing everything I can because I love you.

Second, to mom. Ma, I’m trying so hard. I’ve been trying so hard with my studies, and I never meant to fail a subject. It kills me whenever you say “Find ways to pass that subject” while our prof could not even let us pass(half of his class failed the subject) and I’m so disappointed because you weren’t understanding my struggles.

I also have to take Renee home from Angeles to San Fernando (20Km trip) because I don’t want her to be harmed and I want her to get home safe. Please understand why I always have to be home late. I’m also doing the best I could to take care of you.

Third, to Sir Rudy. Sir, I know I haven’t been the best in class, but I did my best for you. Why fail half of your class? Why fail a class that could only be taken once? Why destroy our future? We did our best, sir. Why?

I feel so hopeless. I do wanna die but I can’t. I can’t yet, not yet until I see my great grand kids.

A reason to go back to tumblr, a reason to love again.

For my whole existence, maybe I’m saying this a lot, but I really wanted you to know, that there’s no one else, other than her, who made everything correct, and made my life more beautiful. There’s no one else in this world other than this woman, whom I would love the most. 

I’ve been through a 18-month relationship, and a risky one. I know we have not been that far, but I know that there’s no other woman who could do the same things as you do. You really are a dream girl, and I could not deny the fact that I still think I am dreaming. For real.

Today marks our first month, and I really wanted to tell you, that no matter what happens, through thick and thin, through death and life, abd even though the world is against us, I’d still be here, for you.

I love you so much, Honeybunch! (nightmarishnightingale) and you will always be the beauty that wards my darkness away.

For a long while, I’ve been doing nothing but schoolworks and visuals, and today, I decided to remix/bootleg music again.

I’m sorry but,

Mom, don’t ever wonder why I’m starting to spend my time with her much more over you. It’s not that I don’t love you anymore or I don’t like being with you anymore. It’s just because whenever I am there for you, you always raise your voice, even though I’m not doing anything bad.

Yes, i still do hear you talking straightly good, but, all the time, you weren’t. I could not understand why you’re not happy that I’m finally here, finally talking to you or finally eating dinner with you.

I suddenly felt this reduction of our closeness started when I have gone into AB Communication. Let’s say I do lots of things, but those things are all for my studies, and I know how much you wanted me to excel in school. I am doing it, though, but in exchange, I have to sacrifice my time just so I could excel.

The amount of time I spend with my girlfriend is nothing compared to the amount I spent with you, but on a daily basis, I chose to spend more with her. Why? Because 1. We’re always in the same class. 2. My formula for a good and everlasting relationship, which is to spend more time with your loved one, is on process, I don’t want to lose her. I’m so sorry. 3. Maybe because whenever I get home, you automatically raise your voice and I tend to just talk to my girlfriend instead. 4. Lastly, you’re not treating me as Gino anymore. Maybe as a son, a human, but not as Gino. Yes I know you already have your grandchild, but I’m still your son. I’m still Gino.

I’m so sorry but, whenever I leave, don’t expect me to be coming home too early, because spending time with you is like spending time with a boss, and not with a mother anymore. Maybe a bit, but the boss thing overflows, and I hate it.

A Dream Come True, A Strike To The Moon, and A Message Saying: “Here’s Your Happily Ever after, Gino!”

Right from February 26, 2017, up until now, I still could not believe that Renee and I are together, and are in love. I still could not believe how I won the challenge, and how I won her heart. I’ve always been keeping everything cool and true, but the fact that she seemed so impossible, is what I mostly think of. Am I still dreaming? How did I deserve her? Renee is the type of person who fills out the blanks that my other exes left unanswered, and the type of person who is grateful for who I am today. I really felt her love back in the day I needed someone, and she was there. She’s there even when I’m alright. She’s just there, and never leaves me. She’s someone never deserves and she chose me.

I asked her “ Will you still be there when I am at your worst.” and she said yes. And that yes, meant “Always.” For the past two years, I’ve been giving it all for my exes, and just tolerate what they can’t give back. Then, there she is. Where has she been all my life? Why have not she shown up on the days I needed a keeper? How come I never bat an eye on her? She’s my ideal girl, and my dream girl. Chinita, short and light complexion. Being the one who supports me in anything, and never forgets to smile at me, is the reason why she’s my ideal girl.

I’ve always had wrong thoughts about my life, and she shown me why they’re wrong. I’ve always had doubts and cleared them. I’ve always had problems and she helped me solve them, and on my happiest days, she deserved me. I love you so much, Nicole Renee Ruiz David!

I choose to stay single forever, until someone at least can promise me that she’ll fix me and choose to stay by my side, forever.

Bakit ko nga ba naisip ‘yon?

If self diagnosis is actually a thing, I am diagnosed with depression. I haven’t been coping up with life in two years, and what made me have this diagnosis is because I have not felt important in two years. I’ve been in two relationships in two years, and the feeling of being prioritized, nor being important, was never in me. After all of those, I chose not to be in a relationship, anymore, until may magpakilala or may ipapakilala sa’kin na talagang mamahalin ako, despite my depression, my suicidal tendencies, and my struggles in life.’Yung ie-embrace ako kapag nafeel ko ang lungkot, 

Sa totoo lang, anywhere and anytime, kaya kong umiyak, and I choose not to, kase bakit diba? kukutyain ka lang naman nila. Pero anyways,

....hindi na nga ako maghahanap talaga, hahayaan ko na lang na dumating ang tamang tao para sa’kin. Mag-aaral na lang ako ng mabuti para-i-honor ko ang family ko sa nagawa nila for me. Maga-abogado ako, and hindi ako papapigil sa goal ko na ‘yon. After kong mabayaran lahat pabalik ang pagmamahal nila sa’kin, pwede na akong mamatay...

......not unless may gustong isama niya ako hanggang pagtanda. Hindi ako maghahangad ng relasyon, pero maghihintay ako ng taong dadalhin ako sa pagtanda. Kung natapos na ako sa goal ko at wala pa, pwede na akong magpakamatay.

people would just ask you if you’re okay. If you’re okay then they’re done. If you’re not, they’d just ask what’s bothering you, then they’re done.

I have this little passion for actually helping people get through with their shortcomings. I would never ask if a person is okay, rather, I’d ask them what’s wrong. If they didn’t answer, I will use my scaling ability to actually predict how “wrong” they feel, and I will help them, with all I’ve got. I would not stop, even if they’re initially happy.

I guess hinahanap ko ‘yong ganoong klaseng kalinga today, pero wala talaga. Wala naman kasing may pake sa’kin. (And please oo Kristyano ako pero do not mention God in here kase gusto ko ng kalinga na galing sa tao,)

So recently, I confessed my feelings for someone, and I don’t know what she means by this:

“Okay, we do not need to speed it up, but we’ll work on this, okay?”

I understand that we all have different views with symbols, pero can I asj you what does she really mean with that? Nothing much have changed, andoon parin kami sa point before I confessed. What does it mean?

swimming onto your sea of thoughts would never really cost you that much, but they can do you harm. But the best thing about swimming your way in is you come up to such ideas that might burst bubbles and actually kill your boredom once you decide to do whatever your thoughts have told you.

It is my intellectual hobby, and I have swam in my own sea lots of times, whenever and wherever I go.

Hindi ko alam kung ako lang ‘yung ganitong klase ng tao or what, pero madalas kase, kapag alam kong crush ako ng tao(malamang girl kase straight ako), kakaibiganin ko, then kahit konting mga pakita chuchu lang, magugustuhan ko ‘yung tao. Parang sa kaniya ko nahahanap ‘yung thought na holly paking shet nage-exist pala ako, then pinapahalagaan niya. Gusto ko talaga sa thought na ‘yon. Sumasaya ako, Tapos binabalik ko ‘yung saya na naramdaman ko sa taong ‘yon, kase kakausapin ko siya ang shit, tapos hanggang sa maging close kami. Ganoon niya ako napasaya eh. Hay. Thoughts!

“Imagine mo ganito, nasa daan ka, both (may) could make you happy, pero either one of the paths is dadaanan mo. Parehas kang mahihirapan, pero hindi parehas ang result. 'Yung unang path is 'yung kung saan dadaan ka sa hirap, which is gagawin mo lahat para magkabalikan kayo. It's either magiging masakit for you ang result or magiging maginhawa. Hindi tayo sure, pero siyempre pwede kang matalo, pwede ka ring manalo. Ang kalawa naman is 'yung path na dadaan ka rin sa hirap, which is gagawin mo lahat para makapag move on, pero in the end masaya ka. 'Yun lang 'yon, naka ensure ang happiness mo, pero matagal ang process. Nasa sa'yo 'yan kung saan ka pupunta, pero huwag kang mag stay sa point na namimili ka pa. Agad kang pumili. AKo kase lagi kong tinetake 'yung "Right" “

I gave this advice to a friend, who is stuck on a situation between letting go and holding on. Hindi man ako masuwerte sa lovelife, pero I think I am good naman at giving proper advice to people.

May kaniya-kaniyang mga advice ang mga tao sa buhay, kase may iba-iba silang aspect, pero ako kase, gusto kong magpaka0general, wherein kahit sino ay makakahingi sa akin ng advice. Gusto ko kaseng tumutulong sa tao and shit, pero ayoko nung tutulungan ko sila, tapos hindi nila inaayos ‘yung sarili nila afterwards. Parang nasayang lang ‘yung mga binibigay ko. Mas gusto ko na ang rerefuse kesa magsasayang.

Ako kase ‘yung tipo ng tao na kapag magbibigay ng advice, mas pipiliin ko ‘yung mas gugustuhin at mas kailangan nilang gawin, pero sa situation na ‘to, mukhang she did not take either path. Hindi naman ako disappointed ng ganoon ka grabe pero at least, na disappoint ako.

Kung ako kase, mas pipiliin ko na ‘yung magmo-move on ako palayo sa taong nakipagbreak or binreakan ko na. Ayoko nang makasakit at masaktan. Ayoko nang sayangin ‘yung buhay ko sa taong inaksayahan ko na ng months or kahit years pa ‘yan. 

Guys, dahil pinost ko na rin ‘tong sinend ko kay ate girl, I will give you one na din.

Kung gusto niyo pang balikan kung sino man ‘yan, I am telling you right now, na wag na please. Kung sinaktan ka na niya ng paulit-ulit, huwag mo nang uulitin. Gagawin niya ‘yan dahil alam niya na this is the kind of person na babalikan niya tapos uulitin niya all over again. People commit mistakes, I’m taking that, pero if someone does errors, aba wag mo na. Repeating their mistakes in an infinite manner is committing errors. DO NOT TAKE ERRORS.