@youwishyouhadmyprettyass / youwishyouhadmyprettyass.tumblr.com
You have many of the abilities of a Disney princess. You can talk to animals, people burst into song around you, and it seems every other day a “Prince Charming” type falls madly in love with you. As one of the most feared mafia enforcers in New York, it’s tough, but you make it work.
“How did you know?!” He squeals, on his knees and shaking.
Your finger tightens on the trigger.
“A little birdie told me.”
^This person wins the internet 😂
Got cut off today, wasn’t even mad.
Happee Birthdae, Harry! | July 31, 1980
me the whole day vs at 4am
Lady Elizabeth.
I was DMing a campaign at a friends house and they discovered they had traveled though a sudden storm onto an island where everyone is happy and no one comes in from outside the island. People on the island didn’t seem to grow old and there were no births that anyone could remember.
Paladin: Ok so I have a theory about what’s happening here.
Druid: What is it?
Paladin: Maybe this is purgatory, maybe we died in the storm and that’s why no one grows old here, cause they’re dead.
DM: (Nodding, that wasn’t the case but it was an interesting theory)
Paladin: So what if we have to die to move on?! Maybe we need to die!
DM: Wait what.
Rest of party: Oh yeah, what if that’s it? That sounds like it could be it!
DM: Um.
Paladin: So should we like? Kill each other? Now?
DM: UM.
THERE IS WATER AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN CARRY THE WATER REMOVE THE WATER
Context: Walo, our aasimar cleric, has suggested diplomacy for every creature in this dungeon, including a griffon, three dust mephits, and a giant scorpion. She did this for the last dungeon too. Everyone was started to get pissed that she would use her first turn in every combat to try futile diplomacy rather than something useful.
Normally-stoic GM: Alright, now it’s Walo’s first turn. {He glares at the player playing Walo, a little ticked.}
Walo: Well, all the lamia did was hiss at us angrily, then we tried to kill it. {The GM’s face clearly says “Don’t you dare.”} Don’t you think we should try d-
GM, louder than anything he’s said in the last two sessions: SHE’S CHAOTIC EVIL, YOU IDIOT!
Oddly there are people who love this
But still complain about this
As if it’s not the same thematic moment being played over and over in the DCEU
(via conservativeleague)
Ha Yee
fuck mbti and howgarts, the true personality test is guessing what deadly sin you’d be
rb and tag yours i’m lust
