The Australian state of Tasmania is being held hostage and terrorized by a single elephant seal and this has been going on for more than a month now.

He’s just a baby. He’s not even two years old. But he weighs over 1,000 pounds and refuses to go back in the sea even though he’s done molting. His hobbies include blocking roadways, sleeping in front of cars, purposefully knocking over signposts, playing with traffic cones and barking at people.

we are not being held hostage by neil. we love him.

is he behind you as you type that

you're laughing. neil is blocking the cars of people desperate to see the aurora and you're laughing.

The “oh I could definitely write this fanfic in under 5000 words and it really wouldn’t take me that long” voice in your head is actually the devil speaking

My boss is making me work even though theres discord channels to read like morning paper?

i will come kill him with my demon blade

Sometimes I worry you like the demon blade more than you like me

simply dont monday

My dear champions picked another bookwyrm. Temeraire from Naomi Novik's His Majesty's Dragon!

Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to

Of all the struggles humanity has shared across the many ages, I think the most endearing is the struggle to draw a horse. For instance, medieval manuscripts highlight the pertinent questions of "what is a horse" and "which way do horse parts go?"

Maybe not that way.

Plus interpretations drawn by a guy who has seen maybe one animal in his life. Potentially a soulfully distressed dog.

"teeth?? these mfers have teeth?"

And, of course, my all time favorite,

Round.

Bonus: But also? What else is there but this.

peace and love on planet horse.

Bonus 2: unclear on the concept of riding a horse

this has taken the absolute wind out of me

@linndechir

I must not kill myself killing myself is the myself killer . Dune

trust between two people who could easily kill one another (especially when it would be the more sensible option in the scenario) drives me insane. you could kill me. you SHOULD kill me. but you won’t. and i won’t. and i’m going to go a step further and trust you to hold my life in your hands. as i hold yours. wild sick twisted etc

best response of all time

Just a dandy boy 🌻

[image description: an animation of a lion-like creature with a green leafy body and a dandelion flower for a head. it walks along, then sits and yawns. end description.]

Tolkien Tolkien Tolkien Tolkien i'm begging of you please don't kill my man

His beauty is beyond compare His stature tall, and long his hair Like every other man you wrote has been I know the more you speak his praise The fewer his remaining days How easily you break my heart, Tolkien

I think this song is made of lies Your fave's your fave because he dies Or 'cause his pain gets worse in every scene. If what it took to make us care Was fairness, wisdom and great hair We'd all be on here stanning Finarfin.

What slander found within these notes! I stan Finarfin, love him totes But in the text he largely stays unseen He lost his sons, his daughter banned He suffered plenty at Jirt's hand Death isn't the worst fate cast by Tolkien But Elrond and Finarfin show What we all here already know The chance of getting out alive is lean How many more were slain and lost Their tales compel, but there's a cost My love is true, it belongs to Tolkien Tolkien, Tolkien, Tolkien, Tolkien i'm begging of you please don't kill my man Tolkien, Tolkien, Tolkien, Tolkien An Andreth, Turin, Finrod, Beleg fan

Many joys in this, but the flawless scansion shows one of the many benefits of reading Tolkien.

Bernard Hill

1944 - 2024

I am deeply enjoying the facial expressions on both woman and bird in this marginal drawing.

(Cambridge UL MS Add. 4085)

I simply don't think that's true eBooks.com but thank you anyway