Find Me In Outer Space

I love you “unlikeable” female characters I love you rude girls I love you mean women I love you girl interpretations of the “Asshole with a Heart of Gold” trope I love you women who get labeled Cold and Unfeeling I love you girls who lash out I love you women who lie I love you female characters who make people mad just by existing

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Alright, I need to have a chat with the teenagers that follow me, specifically regarding lying about your age and nsfw content. This isn’t directed at anyone, but I think it’s a convo that needs to be had in general.

I was a teenager once. I get it. Everyone lies about their age online. Maybe not to other people, but I’m sure every minor has clicked a ‘yeah, sure, I’m 18+” button at some point in their lives. I’m not here to shame you for that.

What I am here to say is it is vital that teenagers understand the difference between engaging in sexual content independently (ie, entering a fake birthday to access 18+ content), and lying about your age to engage in sexual activities with others online (joining discord servers/using nsfw channels intended for adults only/lying about your age to talk to nsfw content creators/commissioning nsfw art/etc).

Lying about your age to a website so you can look at porn is one thing. It’s an entirely independent experience, where the only consent that really matters is yours. Nobody has any power over you in this situation, and there’s about no chance of legal consequences.

However, lying about your age to other human beings is extremely different. If you’re engaging in nsfw roleplay with a friend about the same age as you, talking about sex with other teenagers, sharing nsfw fics among friends, that’s one thing. But do not lie about your age to engage in sexual activities/discussions. Not only is something that could have actual legal ramifications, and very serious ones depending on what’ going on, but it’s a violation of the other people’s consent. The moment other real people are involved, you need to be respectful of their boundaries & what is and isn’t appropriate for you to be engaging with. If they say no minors, I don’t care if you’re 17.5, you stay out until you are 18 years old.

Examples of situations where it is never okay to lie or mislead anyone about your age online include:

I know that adult websites have basically trained teenagers to just say they’re 18 and move on, but it is vital that teenagers understand that it is never okay to lie about your age when directly engaging in any kind of sexual activity. Knowing people’s age is a vital part of consent, and if an adult is found to have been engaging in sexual activity with a minor, they could face life long legal consequences. Not only that, but a basic facet of consent is clear, honest communication. If you are lying to a partner, then you do not have consent. Lying about your age is a huge violation of consent.

That’s not to say you can never mention sex around adults online. There are times and places where you may be asking for advice, or even just making jokes about sex or whatever. That’s all well and good, so long as everyone is on the same page. It’s on adults to make sure that we are behaving appropriately around minors online, and make sure that we’re setting boundaries in those relationships. But it’s on minors to communicate that they are minors, and respect those boundaries that are set.

So, tl;dr,

Lying about your age to access a porn site is fine. Lying about your age to engage in sexual situations/adult-only spaces where other real human beings are involved is not.

I remember being at a con ages ago and witnessing a minor and her friend DEMANDING access to 18+ material in the Artist Gallery, saying that she’d seen much worse on the internet so the artists were being both unfair AND stupid not letting her view it. They said you’re right, we can’t prevent you from looking at smut on the internet, so feel free to go back to your room and do that

I think that anecdote perfectly demonstrates the point of disconnect:

The 2 teens demanded to see the nsfw material on the grounds that they’d seen worse, they could handle it.

Teenagers who do these things think that “don’t lie about your age” is about their protection. And they object bc they feel that they are perfectly safe doing it.

But it’s not about them. It’s about the people they are lying to.

If this is you, please realize: This is not a case of adults trying to baby you. It’s not about whether anyone thinks you can handle it. It’s about the fact that they don’t want it. These adults are protecting their own boundaries, not trying to set yours.

also, I know a lot of you are cool illegalist mfs who know that ethics are more important than what the law says, but in addition to the ethical issues already mentioned, there very much are also severe legal consequences for adults who unknowingly engage in sexual stuff with minors online. the burden of proof to show that you didn’t actually know the person was a minor is very high, and just the fact that the minor lied is often not enough to defend against a guilty verdict since most things are a crime whether or not you knew you were breaking the law.

if you lie to an adult about your age and then e.g. enter into a sexual relationship with them, send them nudes, etc, that person could be charged with statutory rape, sexual assault of a minor, possession of child pornography, child endangerment, sex trafficking if they helped you travel across state lines to come see them, or a whole host of other crimes federal and state governments have passed to crack down on child sexual abuse - the consent of a minor is meaningless in the eyes of the law, even if you’re a very mature 17.5 year old, and the federal age of majority is 18 regardless of what your state laws say. they could get serious jail time and be on the sex offender registry for life, and subsequently be subjected to job and housing discrimination (no one wants to rent to or hire a “child molester”).

the carceral state is CONSTANTLY trying to paint queers as pedophiles and sex deviants in order to exclude us from public life and I KNOW that directly means that lying about your age is probably much more common for queer kids because you want to know and learn about a community that is so often hidden behind NSFW filters out of a belief that it’s “adult,” but lying to OTHER QUEER PEOPLE and getting them in trouble makes it so so easy for the people who hate us to play up that narrative and get people killed over it.

The “age of maturity” number is a bit random, but the concept it’s trying to capture—maturity—is a real thing. Minors who lie about their age and violate the consent of others demonstrate exactly why we have the concept of minority/majority in the first place: they’re not mature enough to be treated like adults. Throwing a fit about it, like toddlers in a supermarket, just proves that some minors absolutely must be treated like the children they still are, because adulthood requires respect for others’ boundaries and for the word “no.”

Today’s mood:

The Doctor, laying on the floor…

Having a lil snack :)

Series 1, Episode 2: The End of the World / Series 14, Episode 1: Space Babies

i think everyone needs to adopt "i didnt say it was good, i said i liked it" into their vocabulary right now. it did me wonders

I don't think it's a radical ideal for the want of Hawai'i to become their own independent country. It should have never been taken over by the US in the first place. For a country whose entire foundation is based upon "separation from a colonial country" it's laughable that they made an entire population that was self governed into a state. It's insulting. It's already blatantly obvious that this whole country was based on lies and blood, and it only continues to perpetuate that. I'm shocked that the Hawai'ian sovereignty movement isn't mainstream even though they have been fighting for it since 1997. Fuck the American government.

"The contemporary sovereignty movement remains splintered regarding statehood. Some, who argue that the U.S. has illegally occupied the islands, have advocated for a restoration of land, along with compensation. Others, who believe a complete restoration is impossible, have sought federal recognition of Hawaiians as Native people—with some lands returned. Some have argued against the kingdom’s restoration and national recognition; instead, they’ve sought the decolonization of Hawaii under the International Trusteeship System created by the United Nations for territories under the control of foreign powers.

"In 1993, the federal government issued a formal apology for the overthrow of the Hawaiian monarchy—and acknowledged that the Hawaiian people never formally relinquished their lands. In 2009, a bill seeking federal recognition of Native Hawaiians as an Indigenous tribal group passed the U.S. House but has since stalled. Known as the Native Hawaiian Government Reorganization Act, a.k.a. the Akaka bill, it would allow Native Hawaiians to form their own government on par with that of the federal government. If passed, it would provide their first self-determination since America overthrew the monarchy in 1893."

this has been discussed before but reducing female characters to the girlboss braincell holder in the name of combating misogyny in fandom is ironically also a form of misogyny

people love love loooove to go on and on and on about whiteguy #135336843’s internal torment and the nuances of his writing and then when it comes time to talk about women it’s all um actually she can do no wrong and holds the braincell and babysits the boys like a mother hashtag feminism. i hope you fucking blow up

That line from the new Doctor Who trailer about "things turning more and more... Supernatural" would have set this website on fire a few years back.

La Chapelle L’ange au Violon, France by JR pharma

hello I am speaking to you from the future: this guy is awful at sex and will put you in the hospital. he owes you $500. you will have one orgasm the entire time you are with him and it will be followed by him scolding you to move your hand away from your clit because "it's distracting" and he can't cum unless he mimics the exact same level of numb pressure and total dissociation he has conditioned himself to masturbating with five times a day. every girl he has ever dated has tried to commit suicide. after you get away from him you will realize he looks exactly like Carl from Aqua Teen. instead of dating him you should turn your 100k word Sabrina fanfic into a breakout YA novel using find-and-replace and buy a decent vacuum cleaner

Keith Haring photographed by Bruce Osborn, 1983.

since we did the "gray cats blue eyes challenge", we should now do the "golden cats, amber eyes challenge", featuring mothwing, lionblaze, tree and and goldenflower

replaced tree with leopardstar bc i’ve never read any books with him 💀

Remember in The Satan's Pit where the devil tells The Doctor that if he kills him he will also kill Rose and The Doctor basically goes 'Rose Tyler is a bad bitch you can't kill her'