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All My Base Are Belong To Me

@azraili / azraili.tumblr.com

Strangeness, Kinkiness, Geekiness, Nerdiness, Intelligence aaaaaannnndddd: Musicals.
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calanoida

Susanna and the Elders, Restored (Left)

Susanna and the Elders, Restored with X-ray (Right)

Kathleen Gilje, 1998

wow

Oooh my gosh this is rad. This is so rad.

For those who don’t know about this painting, the artist was the Baroque artist Artemisia Gentileschi.

Gentileschi was a female painter in a time when it was very largely unheard of for a woman to be an artist. She managed to get the opportunity for training and eventual employment because her father, Orazio, was already a well established master painter who was very adamant that she get artistic training. He apparently saw a high degree of skill in some artwork she did as a hobby in childhood. He was very supportive of her and encouraged her to resist the “traditional attitude and psychological submission to brainwashing and the jealousy of her obvious talents.”  

Gentileschi became extremely well known in her time for painting female figures from the Bible and their suffering. For example, the one seen above depicts the story from the Book of Daniel. Susanna is bathing in her garden when two elders began to spy on her in the nude. As she finishes they stop her and tell her that they will tell everyone that they saw her have an affair with a young man (she’s married so this is an offense punishable by death) unless she has sex with them. She refuses, they tell their tale, and she is going to be put to death when the protagonist of the book (Daniel) stops them.

So that painting above? That was her first major painting. She was SEVENTEEN-YEARS-OLD. For context, here is a painting of the same story by Alessandro Allori made just four years earlier in 1606: 

Wowwwww. That does not look like a woman being threatened with a choice between death or rape. So imagine 17 year old Artemisia trying to approach painting the scene of a woman being assaulted. And she paints what is seen in the x-ray above. A woman in horrifying, grotesque anguish with what appears to be a knife poised in her clenched hand. Damn that shit is real. Who wants to guess that she was advised by, perhaps her father or others, to tone it down. Women can’t look that grotesque. Sexual assault can’t be depicted as that horrifying. And women definitely can’t be seen as having the potential to fight back. Certainly not in artwork. Women need to be soft. They need to wilt from their captors but still look pretty and be a damsel in distress. So she changed it. 

What’s interesting to note is that she eventually painted and stuck with some of her own, less traditional depictions of women. However, that is more interesting with some context.  

(Warning for reference to rape, torture, and images of paintings which show violence and blood.)

So, Gentileschi’s story continues in the very next year, 1611, when her father hires Agostino Tassi, an artist, to privately tutor her. It was in this time when Tassi raped her. He then proceeded to promise that he would marry her. He pointed out that if it got out that she had lost her virginity to a man she wasn’t going to marry then it would ruin her. Using this, he emotionally manipulated her into continuing a sexual relationship with him. However, he then proceeded to marry someone else. Horrified at this turn of events she went to her father. Orazio was having none of this shit and took Tassi to court. At that time, rape wasn’t technically an offense to warrant a trial, but the fact that he had taken her virginity (and therefore technically “damaged Orazio’s property”. ugh.) meant that the trial went along. It lasted for 7 months. During this time, to prove the truth of her words, Artemisia was given invasive gynecological examinations and was even questioned while being subjected to torture via thumb screws. It was also discovered during the trial that Tassi was planning to kill his current wife, have an affair with her sister, and steal a number of Orazio’s paintings. Tassi was found guilty and was given a prison sentence of…. ONE. YEAR……. Which he never even served because the verdict was annulled.

During this time and a bit after (1611-1612), Artemisia painted her most famous work of Judith Slaying Holofernes. This bible story involved Holofernes, an Assyrian general, leading troops to invade and destroy Bethulia, the home of Judith. Judith decides to deal with this issue by coming to him, flirting with him to get his guard down, and then plying him with food and lots of wine. When he passed out, Judith and her handmaiden took his sword and cut his head off. Issue averted. The subject was a very popular one for art at the time. Here is a version of the scene painted in 1598-99 by Carivaggio, whom was a great stylistic influence on Artemisia:

This depiction is a pretty good example of how this scene was typically depicted. Artists usually went out of their way to show Judith committing the act (or having committed it) while trying to detach her from the actual violence of it. In this way, they could avoid her losing the morality of her character and also avoid showing a woman committing such aggression. So here we see a young, rather delicate looking Judith in a pure white dress. She is daintily holding down this massive man and looks rather disgusted and upset at having to do this. Now, here is Artemisia’s:

Damn. Thats a whole different scene. Here Holofernes looks less like he’s simply surprised by the goings ons and more like a man choking on his own blood and struggling fruitlessly against his captors. The blood here is less of a bright red than in Carrivaggio’s but is somehow more sickening. It feels more real, and gushes in a much less stylized way than Carrivaggio’s. Not to mention, Judith here is far from removed from the violence. She is putting her physical weight into this act. Her hands (much stronger looking than most depictions of women’s hands in early artwork) are working hard. Her face, as well, is completely different. She doesn’t look upset, necessarily, but more determined. 

It’s also worth note that the handmaiden is now involved in the action. It’s worth note because, during her rape trial, Artemisia stated that she had cried for help during the initial rape. Specifically she had called for Tassi’s female tenant in the building, Tuzia. Tuzia not only ignored her cries for help, but she also denied the whole happening. Tuzia had been a friend of Artemisia’s and in fact was one of her only female friends. Artemisia felt extremely betrayed, but rather than turning her against her own gender, this event instilled in her the deep importance of female relationships and solidarity among women. This can be seen in some of her artwork, and I believe in the one above, as well, with the inclusion of the handmaiden in the act.

So, I just added a million words worth of information dump on a post when no one asked me, but there we go. I could talk for ages about Artemisia as a person and her depictions of women (even beyond what I wrote above. Don’t get me started on her depictions of female nudes in comparison to how male artists painted nude women at the time.) 

To sum up: Artemisia Gentileschi is rad as hell. This x-ray is also rad as hell and makes her even radder.

I love art history.

I’m reblogging this again to add something that I also think is important to know about Artemisia Gentileschi. Back in her time and through even to TODAY, there are people who argue that her artworks were greatly aided by her father…. As in he either helped her paint them or just straight up painted them himself. Hell, there are a number of works only recently (past several years or so) that have been officially attributed to Artemisia because people originally saw the signature with “Gentileschi” in it and automatically attributed it to Orazio. So, not only was Artemisia Gentileschi an amazing artist and amazing historical figure, but I don’t want it to be ignored that there are people over 400 years later who still won’t give her the credit she deserves, just because she’s a woman and obviously women can’t paint like she did.

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amarilloo

I fucking love Artemisia Gentileschi

since this version hasn’t been corrected: the ‘x-ray’ is a derivative artwork by kathleen gilje in 1998. as you can see in the original post because it’s correctly labelled. it is not an x-ray of the original work

fans of artemisia in London or able to travel here next month (oct 2020) will be delighted to learn that the national gallery is having a retrospective of her works in delayed celebration of the acquisition last summer of her self portrait as st Catherine

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aeruh

Rosemary? You mean spicy pine needles?

Are you insinuating that regular pine needles aren't spicy???

Regular pine needles are regular

Not by rosemary standards

...Have you eaten pine needles?

We've been friends for like four years, do you seriously have to ask if I've eaten pine needles or not

I mean I’m pretty sure you have but I don’t want to assume

Of course I've eaten pine needles. Various kinds. Singleleaf pinyon is weirdly the best

Are they...

spicy?

You know, I'd love to tell you but I'm pretty unclear about what marks the difference between "spice" and "strong-tasting plant that isn't considered a spice"

I’ll have to eat some pine needles myself then to find out

Ok but it only counts if they're PINE needles and not just any old needle-like leaf off a tree

I’m going to eat every needle-like leaf I see

Please Don't Do That

Needle-Like Leaf Roulette

...I'll accept this plan as long as you promise not to eat any yew leaves.

I can try very hard not to

Pine needles are distinguished by the presence of a sheath-like structure at the base of the leaf, almost always holding bundles of two or more leaves. Yews don't have the sheath thing

It’s time for me to go out into the woods and stare at needle leaves

Finally you can gain real insight into my average daily life

this conversation reads like two shakespeare characters who come out in the middle of the play to talk about something completely unrelated for comic relief and then are never heard from again

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sixpenceee

Loggers will often ‘ride’ a flotilla of logs down the river. This retired logger shows he’s still got it.                           

My adventurous ass in my 70s lol

LOGALOGALOGALOGALOG!

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A five-year-old child, Carver, sent Baby Yoda to firefighters in Oregon to thank them for all of their efforts.

They now take him everywhere:

Thank you, firefighters! 🙏

Il materiale di origine: Baby Yoda fights fires (Facebook)

This is the most wholesome thing I have ever seen. 🥺♥️

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reblogged

hey!!!!!! congrats!!!!! why??? you ask???? because you made it to today!!! even after everything !! i’m so proud of you!!

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when i was in 3rd grade there was this girl named sydney who was really nice but everyone thought she was weird cause she was obsessed with horses and were kinda mean to her but anyways she let me borrow her aragon books an i could only read like 5 pages of that shit cause it was so boring, and she was like, i know you didnt read my aragon book, i mirror watched you last night and since then ive been absolutely fucking terrified

same year we had a zoo field trip, she and her mom offered to take me so i felt like i had to repay her so  i stole a fuck ton of snacks from everyones lunches while they were feeding the elephants then i asked her mom if we could eat in the canopy zone away from everyone else and i gave them all the snacks & her mom was like “are you a mischievous spirit that my daughter has befriended ??” i was like no im a third grader … right after that they moved. i think its my fault

They probably watch you occasionally to this day

she fucking better she said she would protect me from imps

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sixpenceee

The silvery sheen of this Cutlass fish                           

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voyagerprobe

is there any temptation greater than being in the hardware store and seeing the place where they have all the little cards for the colours

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zagreus

as someone who works in the paint department of a hardware store i just wanna say that you are absolutely allowed (and ENCOURAGED!) to grab as many cards off the rack as you want so long as you don’t take more than one or two of each colour (they are free for customers but the store only gets so many at a time so please don’t just walk off with our ENTIRE supply of SW 7587 Antique Red cards)

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madmanswords

That’s too specific. Have people been stealing the SW 7587 Antique Red cards in droves lately?

legally i am not allowed to comment

I’m too cheap to actually buy paint so I’ve been going to every hardware store in collecting all the SW 7587 antique red cards and gluing them to my walls

YOU!!!!!! YOU ARE MY ENEMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Using hardware store paint?

oh we’re being snooty about paint now? lmao i’m gonna let you in on a little secret here: the stuff they sell at Benjamin Moore or the Sherwin Williams store for $70 a gallon is (as far as its actual quality and physical properties) all but indistinguishable from the equivalent stuff they sell for like $40 at Lowes or Home Depot. 

it’s a SCAM! it’s corporate sleight-of-hand! our vendors straight up ADMIT this! specialty paint stores (especially big name ones like Spectrum or Sherwin Williams) push their prices WAY up just because they CAN, and because it tricks people into thinking their product is genuinely better overall. and clearly it works

*i do feel i need to add the disclaimer that you need to pay attention to what quality paint you’re getting. if you buy overpriced residential-grade paint from a specialty paint store and expect it to be the same as the ultra-cheap contractor-grade stuff at the bottom of the quality lineup in a hardware store, you’ll be disappointed. talk to your local paint associates and read the fine print. also there are a few specialised products you can’t really get from anywhere other than an expensive paint store, just be sure to get them during one of their big sales if you want to pay a fair price lmao

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