Im Not Dead

someone: where do you see yourself in 10 years?

me: 

i like all those secret dogs underneath very stealthy

…. I don’t fear God, but I do fear the automatic stapler in the staff room

That small but heartfelt “fuck” brings this whole video together. 

I cannot be stopped

this is the most important video i’ve ever seen

This is a spiritual experience.

I want this as my ringtone

i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do

Wtf????

Smoove with it too 

This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters. 

“Pathetic.  You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”

reminds me of this gif

Baseball players are to be feared

Reblogging for the last one

^Same for me

They just kept getting progressively more “woah”

much woah

Oh my god this is a lucky universe

every time this post comes around, my favorite part is the “I know it’s the Mets” qualifier at the beginning lmao like how baseball that this zillion note posts starts with “sorry for putting this hellteam on your dash, bUT”

@southsidebucky

Credit: vanswarpedtour on IG

Credit: vanswarpedtour on IG

‘Kobe’ is for accuracy, 'Yeet’ is for distance.

me: look, a crab eating a strawberry

my roommate: but he’s eating such small pieces..

me: …he’s a crab

why does bart do that voice in this moment and why have i been laughing about it for five fucking hours

ya meen iddaint me noggin issme peepuhs? ohh well thas just Luverlee

My doggo, Ezri, who rarely barks and mostly borks.

When I got her, she’d been abused and would cower and pee at almost everything, and had been mistreated when she’d barked, so she never would. One day months after I had her she got excited on a walk and borked at a bird, and then immediately cower-peed. I had to re-teach her to bark by gathering her whole human pack and having everyone bark and howl and feed her treats and pet her till she got excited enough to join in, and then got more treats. Took a while but I was able to teach her to bork on command (and she’s gotta be excited or she just stares at me like “Sorry, the bork system needs charging”) and she’ll do it happily when she’s excited to go for a walk or upon seeing a friend, and at birds. I love her croaky borking, especially when she started off terrified of making a joyful noise.

I don’t care if I lose a thousand followers overnight, but if you think “tranny” or “shemale” are remotely acceptable ways to refer to a transgender person, please unfollow me.

The number of notes on this pleases both my ego and my fragile faith in humanity.

Adding on, “extra hole boy”, or “pussy boy” are equally abominable ways to refer to trans men.

Dont use Shim, shehe/heshe, chick with a dick d*ckgirl or c*ntboy either

and if you use “it” to dehumanize any trans person i will personally come to your house, break down your door, and piss on everything you own

‘Sissy’ and ‘trap’ are also utterly reprehensible…

Also if you call a trans woman futa I will kick your fucking teeth in

Please yes, im fucking sick of people looking at and consuming futinari culture and think that’s what we are

is it okay for a person who is not trans to reblog this?

Given the fact this is a legit list of words that trans people don’t want to be called/don’t want to hear, I hereby decree this post may be reblogged by everyone who wants to spread the word that these words are NOT ACCEPTABLE.

As somebody who literally had to tell one friend that “tranny” is a slur and “fem-boy” is not what you call a trans woman, I agree with this hardcore

I hope that ghost is happy and healthy like he deserves. It hurts a little because he brought a much needed sense of diversity to the alternative music industry that we don’t have. Nevertheless, his happiness and well being is more important. We still have him and the music. I hope everyone in the band is supportive and this wasn’t something more. 

you have been visited by the seven magic dragon balls your biggest wish will be granted but only if you reblog

Couldn’t risk it.

didn’t realize they change colors. now I know o gotta wish.

THIS SHIT IS REAL I GOT THE JOB I WAS NUTS ABOUT BC I REBLOGGED THIS YESTERDAY maybe it’s a coinkidink but it okay just take the necessary steps to achieve what you’re wishing for and YOU CAN DO IT