Me @ myself: why :) the Fuck™ :) did :) you :) do :) that :):):)

I’m incorrigible too. Only she doesn’t know it.

If i had a dollar for every time someone called me ugly id have 0 dollars bitch what u thought lmao

me: i need to focus

brain: okay

me: so you need to shut up 

brain: okay

me:

brain:

YOU 👉🏻 PUT 😱 THE 👀 PEEPS 🐥 IN 🧠 THE ✨ CHILI 🥘 POT 🍛 AND 😩 EAT 😋 THEM 🍽 BOTH ✌🏻 UP 🔥 YOU 😎 PUT 😤 THE 👏🏻 PEEPS 🍳 IN 🌚 THE 💃🏼 CHILI 🥫 POT 🌿 AND 🙌🏻 ADD 🔢 THE 💁🏼‍♀️ M&MS 🍬 YOU 😭 PUT 👍🏻 THE 🤦🏼‍♀️ PEEPS 🍡 IN 🙈 THE 👅 CH I L I 🍵 POT 🥥 AND 🤷🏼‍♀️ IT 👎🏻MAKES! 😺 IT! 🗑 TASTE! 🎉 BAD! 🤯

tag yourself im macerate

*me in a mirror*: 9/10 *me in a selfie*: 6.3/10 *me in a pic someone else takes*: -2/10 *me*: ??????????

That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard.

Gone Girl (2014) dir. David Fincher

“you’re so polite!” thank you i have anxiety

joseph seed + his family ♡

*shane madej voice* if the demon doesn’t show up in 15 minutes we’re legally allowed to leave

93% of those reblogging posts about how they wish they were farmers have never kept a plant alive and that’s a fact

#two queens stand before you

hey remember when jane austen, a woman, referred to a character named richard as having “never done anything to entitle himself to more than the abbreviation of his name” in 1817. yeah me too.

The OA | Homecoming 

I’m gonna tell you my story from the beginning. And there will come a point when you’ll see why you’re here what you might do together, how you could help people that you’ll never meet. But you have to pretend to trust me until you actually do.