has anyone else’s life been really off lately or is it just me

Honestly Lana yelling “bitch” and “fuck” in the background of Cherry for no reason is the biggest mood of 2017

nobody talks about how ugly taking care of yourself can be

yes, sometimes it’s taking a warm bath and texting memes to friends and keeping an aesthetically pretty journal.

sometimes it’s crying silently on your couch at 3am, hugging yourself and reminding yourself that you’re a good person.

self care is not always ‘aesthetic’ and cute…and that’s ok. don’t be embarrassed, just do what you need to do.

My buddy used to know this guy in high school that would watch porn before every wrestling match he was in. He didn’t beat the meat. Didn’t even play with it. Sat fully clothed and watched violent ass hardcore for like half an hour.

He won almost every match.

Turns out being sexually aroused with no satisfaction makes your testosterone go into overdrive and turns you into a fuckin beast for like 15 minutes.

I do it now everytime I go to the gym. Never had better workouts.

Imagine being the guy figuring this out for the first time.

if you dont nut you unlock superpowers kids

having a raging erection while wrestling is also a great form of psychological warfare

Digging is hard work.

Oh, my heart…

“im getting old” starter pack

How dare you EXPOSE me at 5:18 am on this good Monday

if your girlfriend is cold, be a gentleman. put her in the oven for 40 minutes on 350. check often and serve plain or with white gravy

if she’s cold crack her open with the boys

A woodpecker hitched a ride on the side of this man’s car during a rainy day in Chicago.

Cute but I woulda lost it 😂

Lmfaooooo the way the bird closed its eyes when he said “you’re beautiful” had me weak.

So I heard this story second-hand, many years ago, but the gist was that a friend of a friend lived in what was generally considered a bad neighborhood, because he was a super poor college student and it was what he could afford. He didn’t have any furniture, he just slept on a blanket on the floor and had a milk crate for a chair and like an old wire spool as a table. No TV, nothing in the fridge, no microwave, basically just bare walls and a roof to keep the weather off. So one day he comes home, and there’s a man in his apartment, just standing there, with this look of utter amazement and horror on his face, and he turns to the guy who’s just entered and says, “This your place? ‘cause I broke in to rob you, but shit, man, you ain’t got nothin’. Wait here, I’m’a be right back.” And the burglar left, leaving a puzzled college student alone in his empty apartment. But sure enough, the burglar came back a while later, and brought some friends, and they delivered a table, a couple of chairs, and a small TV. “I think I got you a bed, too, but that might take a couple days.”

So, the poor college student made some friends. And he didn’t ask where they got the stuff.

Broglar.

@mylifeisamusicalreference

would anyone like to idk.. treat me right

Playboy Bunnies: THEN AND NOW

I love this

beautiful

I want them to write a book

I just tried to write a poem n almost died. Never trying to get in touch w my emotions again !!!

Manners are the most important.

Learn this. Live this.

I love this