Issa Keys

i can’t believe there are people that are still in high school like… it’s literally 2018 how have you not grown up yet damn

the guy in the audience SNAPPED

i love this, video

*music intro plays, beat of silence* Audience Member: WHO IS IT??? *people laugh* Britney: It’s Britney bitch.

WHO IS IIIIIIT

I recently found my “gold” hammer after misplacing it. It’s my favorite tool ever because it looks like a regular hammer trying to be fancy,

but then you twist both halves and unscrew it to find a flat-head screwdriver in the middle.

BUT, if you twist the very end and unscrew that

you find a phillips screwdriver.

BUT DON’T THINK THAT’S ALL THERE IS! THERE’S MORE!! unscrew the very end again to find a smaller flat-head screwdriver!

BUT THAT’S STILL NOT THE END!!

unscrew the end of this screwdriver to find a final, teeny tiny, flat-head screwdriver

look at how cute it is!

it’s like a matryoshka doll of tools.

I have one of these and I keep it in my IT toolkit because that teeny little screwdriver is the right side for laptop casings, but because it lives inside a large object it’s harder to misplace than a standard tiny screwdriver. Also because the look on a client’s face when you bring out a brass hammer to fix their laptop is absolutely wild.

Do you remember them?

today i learned fish can be dicks

i am laughing so hard that white fish is such a piece of shit and i love it

Imagine showing this video to someone 6 months ago

Imagine showing this video to someone 1 year ago

oh my god.

This would literally be a closing shot in Black Mirror

Stop asking little girls if they have boyfriends Stop referring to the boys that little girls are friends with as their “little boyfriends” Stop telling little girls they’re going to have boyfriends or be “boy crazy” Stop raising children on heteronormativity and let them be children

Additionally: 1. It’s not funny 2. It’s not cute 3. You are embarrassing them 4. You are completely disregarding them when they tell you “no” and you insist

Stop doing the same to little boys too.

They are not “a little lady’s man.”

Don’t excuse him picking on a girl as him having a crush. Correct the behavior and stop treating it like it’s cute and normal.

Also stop insisting little boys have crushes on significantly older women. It’s gross.

Just let kids be kids.

Its not “men and women just cant be friends” its “you fourced romantic implications on children and made them uncomfortable/embarassed, socially conditioning them to not platonically interact with the opposite sex”

Stop it. let kids be kids. Let kids be friends

EXACTLY

YOU’RE FREAKING WELCOME TEEN TITANS FANDOM

YOOOOOOO!!!!!!

YOU’RE FREAKING WELCOME TEEN TITANS FANDOM

YOOOOOOO!!!!!!

long furby hear my prayers: deliver me a fat bank account, a short butch gf, and a bowl of cocoa puffs

@smallestcitrus

All she can offer is Infinite Pennies…..

Use them Wisely…..

Reblog this and the long furby will shower you in pennies if you keep scrolling then your bank will be dry and empty forever

This is the FUCK TRUMP fairy god mother, ,,good luck and tidings will come to you but only if you comment FUCK TRUMP

Okay but you’re missing this best part! This is the Texas woman, Karen Fonseca, who was threatened by the local Sheriff, Troy Nehls, that she could be arrested for this bumper sticker. She responded with a bumper sticker that read, “Fuck  Sheriff Troy Nehls and Fuck you for voting for him”. Meanwhile, the “Fuck Trump” sticker sales in the county where she lives have sky rocketed.  Please just read the whole story.   x 

Jesus Christ..

I’ve watched this like 30 times and I cant stop laughing aksjska

Hoooooomygawd???? safsdkasajfdsjg

Super emergency. My car broke down and I need $450 to get it fixed. My mechanic won’t do a payment plan, and I need my car so my boyfriend and I can get to and from work to provide for the child that is growing in me. I didn’t want to make another one of these posts, but we need to keep our jobs or everything we’ve been able to build back up… we’re going to lose. If you can donate even a dollar or a reblog, I will forever cherish you. I can also offer my musical abilities as compensation for your donation.

PayPal- kaleiherbert@yahoo.com

Venmo- bubblebath2006

I was able to pay for my car, as a good friend decided to lend me the money. I still have no money for gas or food, though. Please reblog. I will do anything for help at this point.

this is from july 7 2018 you guys!!

Maria Borges by Lucian Bor for Madame Figaro France August 2017