Ass Crack Bandit

[1/?] (insp.)

Great news guys 🎉 

So if women wear makeup at work we’re “frivolous” and it harms our leadership chances.. but if we don’t wear makeup we are being unprofessional and are deemed less competent.

So we just need to think of a way for women to not have faces and we’re all set 🤔

A clear example of how performance of femininity is both compulsory (enforced by social, legal, and economic consequences) and devalued because of misogyny.

the only competent woman is the faceless old woman who secretly lives in your home

Power move of the century.

Son the crazy part is I feel like dogs deadass be understanding when you do this

Daily reminder that Gizmodo is a piece of shit website that doesn’t let people enjoy anything.

Gizmodo author, through gnashing teeth and tears: I’d treat her right…

Look, we’re all hot for Helen but you don’t fucking disrespect Bob like this.

Bob is one of the best dads and husbands in media today and I will fight anyone who says otherwise

this is a pro-bob blog. idiot anti-bobs dont interact.

like obviously i hate buzzfeed and would never work at a place that has such a large hand in destroying serious journalism but i cannot deny that it would be literally the sweetest gig of all time. work in an office with a bunch of other hungover 29 year olds, screenshot posts made by 16 year olds on tumblr who are funnier and smarter than i am and call it an article complete with my own byline, and finish off my day by getting drunk on camera and being paid to do it. that’s the fucking life babey

Right. 

I’ve been seeing this post on my dash all day and normally I’d let this nonsense pass but I’m sick so my ability to tolerate bullshit is at an all time low. 

This is absolute crap - OP is equating BuzzFeed’s lifestyle section with its news section. Lifestyle focuses on listicles, quizzes and light entertainment. News focuses on exactly that. News. 

How good are they at news you might ask? 

I have a masters in digital journalism - I’ve worked for major news organisations across broadcast, print and digital. I was a producer for a major news show by the age of 24; I’ve been mentored by some of the best journalists in Australia - and do you know who everyone told me I should be paying attention to?

BuzzFeed. 

“If you’re lucky, you’ll land a position at BuzzFeed,” my lecturer who holds MULTIPLE doctorates in media and journalism told my class after she took us to a tour of the BuzzFeed Australia office. 

My expertise is in Australia media so you’ll have to excuse the focus on what I’m about to say. 

BuzzFeed Australia was one of the first digital news organisations to become part of the Parliamentary press gallery.  They were instrumental in shaking up the Australian Parliament, leading to dozens of by-elections and threatening to trigger a Federal election after they discovered a number of politicians were holding office whilst dual citizens - which is illegal in Australia. They have spent months pursuing Minister Michaelia Cash for her role in the death of an 18 year old boy in the controversial Work For The Dole scheme, and for her office tipping off the media ahead of police raids on a union office. Oh, and they were the first news organisation in the country to break the news that a major bank had lost the personal financial details of 12 million clients - every other news outlet lifted the coverage directly from BuzzFeed.

And that was in the last 12 months.  

Oh and that Trump piss tape story that everyone here on Tumblr loves to crap on about? That was a BuzzFeed exclusive. 

There’s a really stupid trend on tumblr to seem ‘edgy’ by mocking things that are popular or successful. Don’t shit on the hard work of dozens of journalists who report on incredibly important news and write it with our generation in mind, and then have nerve to turn around and complain that the mainstream media only focuses on older people. 

You just look sad. 

BuzzFeed has been bettering the media landscape for years, and they’ve been doing it while everyone is mocking them. 

Rebooting for this great commentary.

Am a journalist, can confirm

The old way of journalism is dying, and through my work in the industry I’ve come to learn that it’s the industry’s own fault.

Old masters we praise refused to adapt to an evolving culture and changing landscape, and it’s biting them in the ass right now. Some are trying to make up for lost ground, but a lot of others are digging in their heels and falling victim to the confirmation bias they hate.

Buzzfeed was created in the new age. It has nothing to change because it was never intended to do things the old way. It’s spearheading digital journalism (i.e. the literal future of journalism).

Old masters are being bought out by digital media entertainment companies right now, and they’re freaking out. They’re going from writing investigative pieces about government waste to compiling lists of the 20 cutest ugly dogs. They’re watching their friends and coworkers get laid off as the big companies “trim the fat” to make the “paper” more profitable. They’re living a forced change at the hands of a big, scary “unknown” and they hate it.

Buzzfeed isn’t at risk of that, because Buzzfeed has been doing this shit all along.

They’re not facing the fire. They were born in it.

They’ve laid the groundwork for how journalism needs to adapt. They’ve figured out how to get ad revenue in the online world, which is what everyone else has failed to do.

You have someone write 3 bullshit lifestyle pieces a day.

“Ariana Grande’s ponytail evolution”

“30 times OS updates screwed over users”

“These birds had babies and we are LIVING for it”

You make sure you deliver on the headlines. Clickbait won’t work. People won’t trust you when you deliver harder news if you can’t even deliver bullshit.

Get those clicks. Get those views. Get that following. Get that ad revenue. Get those sponsorships. Get that funding.

Use the funding to support harder pieces.

“Report: Justice Kennedy refused to retire unless Kavanaugh replaced him”

“President Trump spent over $1 million of tax payer money on trips to his own resorts”

“Refugee women abused, miscarrying in Trump Camps”

This is how we have to do it now. This is what the digital era demands. Anyone with a ounce of knowledge in the area and a lick of sense could tell you that. The problem is: journalism is run by old masters, and old masters will never admit that they’re way is wrong until it’s too late.

Don’t turn your nose up at adaptation and evolution. It’s how survival works.

^^^ thank god someone finally said it…

me after one shower

Fun FMA manga fact:

This isn’t mentioned in Brotherhood, but the reason Roy and Riza came to Resembool scouting out the Elrics is because someone fucked up the ages on Ed and Al’s file.

Literally Roy and Riza are riding in the back of some horse-drawn carriage into Resembool chatting with the driver like “yes we’ve heard rumors of two alchemist brothers here, Ed and Al Elric ages 31 and 30 respectively. Do you know where they live?” And the driver pretty much answers with “lol what? Those kids are like 10.”

Except now Roy and Riza are already THERE so they decide “Fuck it. Let’s pay a visit anyway.”

So everything that went down in the series is thanks to some mysterious fuck up in the Amestrian Intelligence Department and I salute that person.

Bonus: He buries his goddamn face in the document at the end, like staring at it closer might make it less wrong.

roy’s reaction is literally

Spot the difference

what’s the mood for tonight?

Showing up to the function both overdressed and underdressed at the same time

him

yes

devour the dumpling child

who is he

is this the short before Incredibles 2

Same Place, Different Take // July 2017

Instagram

i literally dont talk to anyone unless they talk to me first

NPC Energy