Trista Mateer (via tristamateer)
☆
Here’s both sides of my sign!
sunday by Andre Pilli on Flickr.
I will find myself and love her so fiercely
room thangs 🌿
WHEN THEY ASK ME, “WHY DO YOU HESITATE TO CRY OUT?” | bianca phipps (via biancaphipps)
Amy Harmon, The Song of David (via seulray)
One Wake up. Your body will feel heavy with the weight of his leaving, Lift it anyway. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, Let your feet feel the floor beneath you. Remind yourself it is still there. It never left. Make your own coffee, Laugh at yourself when you forget to add the water. Try again. Do it until your coffee tastes like the day you want to have. Be proud that you made it by yourself.
Two Take a walk, Look at every stranger you pass on the street, Remind yourself you are not alone. Go to bookstores, Remember other people have stories too. Keep walking, until you’ve gotten as far away from his memory as you can, And when you feel yourself sprinting backwards Trap yourself in the love that is still around you. Let your brother call you twice a day just to say hello, Fall asleep in your best friend’s lap, Remember that his hands are not the only hands that can hold you. Everyone has hands, even you. Touch every part of yourself and learn how to make your body become an ocean. You will turn to waves, Learn how to do it all by yourself You are your own current, You are your own crash.
Three Cry. Cry again and again Because there is nothing wrong with trying to understand. Do not let anyone tell you to get over it, As if love were some tangible thing you can get over, As if it were a mountain to be climbed, Call that mountain Volcano Erupting, Dare them to try to make it all the way up and over Without getting burned.
Four Rebuild. When you’ve finished Love Actually for the third time And you’re out of chocolate ice cream, Use the fire he lit to burn down the box he put you in. His paper walls could never hold an ocean. Explore your own sea, Learn everything you possibly can. Buy yourself new hiking boots and Keep climbing mountains. It will be hard, but it will be worth it. Sacrifice your ankles, Let them blister. With time, they will heal. With time, so will you.
A Lesson in Being OK After the Door Closes // Clara McGowan
God, when I met you, I was too young ask questions. Dazzled by your brightness, Star peeling away from sky, I thought if I sat on my father’s shoulders– Tiny hands stretching into empty nothing– I would reach you. I would know what you felt like, I swore I knew what you felt like.
God, I am older now, A sort of in between girl, Not yet grown but too old for father’s shoulders, And I have forgotten why I loved you at all. I can’t see you anymore. Squinting towards heaven, I see no stars. Only an expansive blackness, A sort of vague emptiness. Sometimes I still listen for your voice, I built an altar out of my future And sacrificed my love for you, Why am I still so lonely?
God, I am standing on top of the cliff you built for us, I want to believe when I jump, you will catch me. I hear sea kiss shore below me, I hear wind shaking trees, I do not hear you. My feet stay planted. I can’t do it. I can’t move.
On Having Faith // Clara McGowan