Fucked up how humanity discovered electricity and radiation and made machines and learned to make airplanes and cured diseases and our takeaway isnt that "Some Magic Is Real And Here's Why", but that magic is fake this is big boy science and it's totally not magical

Me upon being isekaid to a fantasy world: you say you dont have magic but you conjured up that frog the other day whats with that

Wizard who spent decades mastering his craft, understands how and why it works, and processes it entirely as a regular part of his day to day life: did you just call creature conjuring magic

Works the other way around too in isekais.

that wizard: and you said you don't have magic in your world but there are lights that come on, that do not use candles or flames or emit any heat at all, the moment that you walk into a room? you don't even have to say anything?

me, squirming uncomfortably: for a while there an earlier version ran off of two claps

the wizard: an earlier version of what? the spell? the spell you use to make the lights come on?

if I say "I have to Austin Powers my car out of a parking space," do you understand what i mean

like this?

the way tumblr tags trend is so funny, sometimes it seems like if ONE post gets popular the entire tag trends.

I’m gonna do an experiment. let’s use the tag

uhhhhhh

#mole interest

ITS NUMBER ONE NOW

— Unknown

(1) daikon Japanese radish

STOP SCROLLING

Your life ends in the wasteland.

there’s a japanese radish just below this post but you can’t reach it

sometimes you want to relish a special meal, and sometimes you just want to munch on something without really thinking about it.

in the same vein, you will occasionally find yourself starting a book/movie/etc and then immediately have to stop because no, this needs to be savored. but at a later date bc right now u just need media to munch on

Technically true.

He got the job.

He takes his job seriously.

I fuckin’ love this comic. Makes me smile like crazy every time it pops up.

He is the dad to the sheep-

Why are all of you reblogging this without the important context that Alan Denton is a writer on Sonic Boom?

well that’s kinda on his wife then ngl

Bottle rocket under ice

rad 

I’m pretty sure that the reason the ice fractured into six slices is the same reason snowflakes are often six sided and it has to do with the shape of a molecule of water and I just think that’s so freaking cool.

How would it even stay lit though?

!!!!! it IS actually because of the structure of water molecules! Water molecules are fuckin weird, as are lots of other liquid substance molecules, because theyre shaped like fuckin HEXAGONS! hexagons are those weird, six-sided shapes that re very sturdy, but they dont tend to sit very well when stacked together. thats why, when you fill up a glass of water to its full capacity, it can go OVER the brim a little and not spill over. It’s also why water beads.

anyway, so since water is essentially made up of a gazillion little hexagons, it tends to gather into larger hexagons as it shapes together. this is not visible unless the water is in a solid form, aka ice. when the water is split, it tends to crack around the established hexagons. that bottle rocket exploded in the PERFECT place to show this phenomenon and its geeking me out.

ALSO! the bottle rocket stays lit because the fuse was definitely waterproof and made with magnesium and an oxidizer of some sort. this means that they will burn underwater because they dont need the oxygen from the air to stay lit. thats so fucking weird isnt it. im tipsy and its the 4th of july. sorry for the science haha

Don’t you dare apologize for science

Reblogging for science, explosions, and cool hexagons!

WAIT

It’s finally happened.

After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.

“I like your shoelaces.”

Oh. Oh no.

I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”

The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”

Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.

Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.

@victoriansecret I found your friend!!!

john green is back on tumblr so heres some things we’re NOT gonna do okay.

we are NOT going to make jokes about the time he got bullied off here the first time. it was fucked up then and its fucked up now. (that includes jokes about the infamous cock post. you would think it goes without saying but apparently not :/ )

we are NOT going to bully him. its mean and he’s here for a good time same as everyone else. cyber bullying is still cyber bullying if someone is a well known author.

okay? okay. 

sorry what

That header photo doesn’t do the dragon justice. (For shame!). Here’s NASA’s own photo:

(Source [Because NASA is funded by taxpayer money, all their images are public domain, BTW])

THE TIME HAS COME

he is here 

Reblogging for THE ART HOLY SHIT

REALLY THOUGH IMAGINE SEEING THIS KIND OF SHIT AS A DANE IN THE 900S

bro whyd i think they meant an actual freaking dragon

Hate diet culture so much bitches will b like “don’t eat processed carbs they’re so bad for you” like and??? So what?? God did not give us grain and stone to grind it with for no reason. Bread is inevitable. Bread is food for the heart and the soul. U think I’m gonna give that up in pursuit of instagram fitness?? U think I’m gonna deny myself the simple pleasure of toast with jam so I can endlessly chase an ever-shifting standard of beauty that ultimately means nothing? In 20 years I will no longer be beautiful and in 60 my body will be vacant food for other, smaller creatures. But the taste of fresh bread? Of homemade donuts and still-warm pie? I will carry the taste on my tongue into whatever follows this life. So like. Stop telling me I should diet lmao. I’m not abt to martyr myself just to get a man to look at me.

Op genuinely thank you for this

“bread is inevitable” is our household motto now