Study, Read, Write

You don't have to enjoy self care.

Of course, having fun and making yourself happy is always a good thing. But if doing things for yourself feels like a chore, that's okay.

Maybe going outside doesn't always clear your head. Maybe working out doesn't normally make you feel any different. That's fine! It's completely valid to treat those things the way you'd treat taking medicine: "Got my sunlight chemicals. Check. Got my exercise chemicals. Check."

It might be helpful to simply treat "getting your chemicals" as something to help you sleep and/or for your long-term health. It's great when you're having fun, but it's okay when that doesn't happen.

13.4.20

Y’all know I only post original content on here unless I feel like it’s important to share. Take it in ✨

Things I learned after teaching literacy for 10 years...and after making many, many mistakes. Are these hard and fast rules? Of course not. But these helped me foster a love of reading with my students, and helped bring more joy into our classroom.

1. Reading comprehension questions is not how people learn to love reading. Answering basic reading comprehension questions rarely helps students grow. The students who can already answer the questions independently don’t need to, and the ones who can’t answer the question won’t.

2. Read out loud. No matter the age, no matter if you’re all listening to an audiobook/podcast, no matter if it’s an op-Ed piece, no matter if it’s Strega Nona for the 30th time. Read meaningful and authentic text out loud.

3. When you’re reading out loud, pause only when necessary to clarify meaning so you don’t interrupt the flow of reading. Let them get hooked!

4. Make a class on epic! so your students can read and listen to books for free during school hours! Plus there are so many engaging nonfiction books at all level that you can present to your class.

5. Every student should have a chance to read something at their level every day. It’s their right as a reader.

6. Be open about what you love to read about, and talk about your own journey as a reader! I talk about my books clubs and describe to my second graders how I still stay up late reading, or how proud I was when I finished reading my 1,000+ page fantasy novel.

7. Use videos to supplement vocabulary/topics! Especially if you have students who are English Language Learners. Nat Geo has these great short (3-5 min) videos about so many topics.

8. When in doubt, read about animals. Every child loves reading about animals.

9. Allow space for students to recommend books they loved or ask them for recommendations.

10. Keep reading sacred and fun! And smile. You get to teach reading, the best thing in the world.

“on the mountainside, weeton’s humanity seems to dissolve until she appears more bird than biped.” from wanderers: a history of women walking (2020) by kerri andrews | i am nearly in tears over the ellen weeton chapter of andrews’ book (must find myself a copy of weeton’s letters and journals post-haste) but what a way to sink back into research and writing after the new year—! 

photo from my instagram @livinghours / photo + gif pairing inspired by @galina

the inherent shame of beginning… dont look at me while i learn

“the inherent shame of beginning”

i admit, “don’t look at me while i learn” hits hard… but why is that so? when i was 7 years old i sang along to songs i had yet to fully learn by bumbling through sounds that half-resembled what i thought i heard, at full volume.

at 6, i would practice ballet moves–in which i had no instruction–outside the theater after a professional performance, in full view of the public.

at 5, i asked my teacher so many questions that she affectionately called me Bug–because i was always bugging her with my endless inquiry. i loved the nickname.

at 14, i was afraid to practice a song in my own room with no one home because, “what if my voice cracks? what if i can’t hit that note?”

at 15 i was afraid to dance in the garage with no one around because–i mean how embarrassing would it be to get the move wrong?

at 16, i forgo asking questions in class because god forbid i not understand.

what is this? “the shame of beginning”, we say. but not inherent, never was it inherent. the child loves to begin! they love making the silly mistake. the world tells us the mistake is fatal, or worse, shameful. what a tragedy. the world strangles our joy of beginning and when we’re old enough we add our own hands to the neck.

but the truth is we begin everyday and we are wrong and we’re dumb and we make silly mistakes and at the end of it all we are still the brilliant learners we’ve always been. there is no shame. it’s alright. i don’t know how to properly express that i wish upon everyone who’s reblogged this post to realize the shame is in our hands wrapped around the neck. we can let go. allow the self-kindess of your heart to soothe the bruises.

learning is no secret burden. we do it together :)

Was this meant to be inspirational? Because it is and now I’m halfway to tears

write down all the things that make you feel courageous so you don’t forget that there is bravery in you too

for better or worse i’ve recently realized that self care, for me personally, sometimes means extra effort instead of less. like making my bed every day makes me feel good about my living space even though it’s a couple minutes of work, and plating my food nicely makes me feel like i’ve made and eaten a nice meal even if it means cleaning more dishes. i used to think self care was almost synonymous with making things easier for yourself, but sometimes challenging yourself a little tiny bit more than usual is more rewarding than doing it the easiest way, although that isn’t true for everyone, i know, it’s just how things have turned out for me

I think we need to apply this to older movies as well:

The homophobic gag in that rom com,

the racist side character in that coming of age story,

don’t just brush it of as a product of the time, acknowledge that it was bad then and remains a terrible aspect of the film today

[ID: a response to the tweet ‘What’s your hottest literature take?’ (By @cxcope). The reply is from liv / @boredromantic and says:

“ young women’s criticism of the (violent) misogyny in “classic” lit should be taken 100% seriously. if a teen girl says the rapey overtones of 1984 ruin the whole book for her, she’s not less intellectual. this goes double for girls refusing to read classics that are misogynistic”]

— B.N. Harrison, from “The Unified Theory of Ophelia” (via shakespeareismyjam)

— Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic

consider: teenagers aren’t apathetic about everything they’re just used to you shitting all over whatever they show excitement about

Teen: *gets a job*

“I GOT THE JOB!”

Parents: Well, when I was your age, I already had 5 jobs and was supporting my family

Teen: *gets all A’s*

“I worked really hard!”

Parents: Well, of course you did, this is the expectation, not a celebration.

probably why so many teens take to social media where they can enthusiastically share their interests and achievements and get positive feedback that their parents never gave

A LITTLE LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK

This hit hard

I remember once, when I was in my early 20s, I was an afternoon supervisor at my job, and I worked with mostly teenagers, and the one day this one kid, who was like 15, was bored so I suggested he could clean out the fridge. He did and when he was done I said he did a good job.

After that, this kid was cleaning out the fridge at least once a week, and I was like, “why are you always cleaning the fridge?” Like, I didn’t mind, but it seemed odd. And he said, “one time I cleaned the fridge and you said I did a good job. I wanted to make you proud of me again.”

Literally, I changed the entire way I interacted with teenagers after that. I actually got a package of glitter stars and I would stick them on their nametags when they did a good job, and they loved it.

My manager had commented on how hard these kids work and I said, “they’re starved for positive feedback. They go to school all day then come to work all evening and no one appreciates it because it’s expected of them, but they’re still kids. They need positive feedback from adults in their lives.”

Like, everyone likes feeling appreciated. Everyone likes being complimented and having their efforts be noticed. Another coworker (who was a mother of teenage children), hated that I did this, and said they were too old to be rewarded with stickers, but like… it wasn’t about the stickers. The stickers were just a symbol that their effort was noticed and appreciated. I was just lucky that I learned this at a time when I was still young enough to remember what it was like to be a teenager. I was only 2 years out of highschool at that point and highschool is fucking hard. People forget this as they get older, but ask anyone and almost no one would ever want to go back and do it again, but they expect kids to suck it up because they’re young so they should be able to do school full time, plus homework, and work, and maintain a healthy social life, and sleep, and spend time with family, and do chores and help out at home, and worry about college and relationships and everything else, and then just get shit on all the time and treated like they’re lazy and entitled. And then they wonder why teenagers are apathetic.

Something that my counsellor told me that is still relevant is that sometimes you’re not going to have the time to cover all of your material or complete everything that is required to do within your studies and assignments.

 Whether it’s completing certain amount of readings or note taking or studying, each person has a unique circumstance and the education system doesn’t personalize the work for you. A person who is struggling with a mental illness, a person who is currently supporting someone else in need, a person who feels burn out easily or a person who takes longer to absorb the material; they all will get the same degree of workload from someone who doesn’t understand what each individual goes through out side of their academic life. Sometime even if there is nothing wrong, the unrealistic expectation to be working 24/7 or that you can finish so much work is not possible. 

And that’s okay. You’re human and you’re going through life your own way. It’s okay that you couldn’t finish everything and it is not the end of the world. It doesn’t make you less capable or less intelligent.

We move on. 

I no longer believe in time. My day is structured by what number cup of tea I’m on.