Impossible Loss
He'd know there would be trouble the second he made the decision to go. The Ogrons were a brutal, thuggish race but their recent return in worrying numbers meant they had to be dealt with and so he and Clara went. They were also possessed of a long memory for even imagined wrongs and so the many defeats they suffered at the hands of the Doctor rankled.
The moment it happened is frozen forever in his memory. They'd gotten through many obstacles and soon came face to face with the leader of the tribe. He was a brute like all the rest but had a gift of raw cunning that set him apart. So it was that he pretended to talk treaty with the Doctor, but the second he foolishly turned away the Ogron swung a great bladed club for the Doctor's back.
He heard Clara begin to move and turned just in time to see her intercept the blow, skewering her like a bug on a card. She mewled weakly as blood spilled from the corner of her mouth and simply sagged. The Doctor had begun to move, but he couldn't stop what had happened and so even as their backup arrived to deal with the Ogron chief the Doctor was on his knees, frantically trying to get Clara to hush just hush save your strength please don't die Clara please. But it was too late.
"Run, you clever b.." was as far as she managed of her last words.
It broke him. He howled his agony to the sky and his thin shoulders shook in great, wracking heaves of pure grief. He even snarled like a wounded animal when they tried to pry him from her. Scooping her body into his arms, he backed away toward the TARDIS looking as dangerous as any threat they'd faced that day.
He buried her next to her mother, personally. He felt.. nothing. At all. His face might well have been carved from granite for all the emotion he showed during it all. After laying her to rest, he returned to Victorian London and his cloud. He didn't even bother to tell Vastra and her lot he was there, not this time. There'd be no return for the Doctor, not this time. Too much grief, too much loss, the universe had taken from him senselessly one too many times and he was quite simply done.
He didn't eat, he didn't drink He simply didn't care enough to anymore, not without her. He knew the biological failsafes of his people wouldn't allow him to starve, he'd go into a kind of stasis. But it was enough, and the universe would be without the man who forgets.
Perhaps, he thought, perhaps I'll get to see Clara again.. as the paralysis began to take hold.
But was that truly the end? Ah, now that would be telling. Spoilers, you know.
