My fiancè, like me, has also been working his ass off in grad school and his advisor told him today that he’s not making the progress he needs in order to graduate next year. It kind of crushed him.
Again, yet another rant about why I hate academia…we’re expected to do EVERYTHING in the lab— manage parts of the lab, manage multiple people usually without help, even do admin stuff for the lab along with experiments and seminars and writing papers and everything— and then our advisors have surprised pikachu faces when progress is slow and they blame us for it and make us work harder! This happened to me at my committee meeting last year too and I was crushed when they said I didn’t have enough to graduate in less than two years, despite having worked so hard to get there. And there were also times that my fiancè dedicated a LOT of time to work and I didn’t see him much and it really affected our relationship negatively.
No degree should be SO important that you feel like you can’t take care of yourself and you turn your back on people you love the most to do it. I hate that even though advisors know we have relationships and/or pets and/or families to take care of, they expect us to drop everything for research. It’s so ridiculous and honestly shouldn’t even be as tolerated as much as it is.
