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@bitchwithavitamix / bitchwithavitamix.tumblr.com

god's personal jester
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It’s not love unless you spell it out in shrimp excrement

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so on our first date i made a joke about having a cardboard cut out of myself up on top of the walker center downtown and later on when we were dating dani said he was going to put his own cardboard cut out up there to be with mine and anyway it’s 3:30 am and im making a little paper version of the building that im going to print out tiny pictures of us and put on it for his birthday on thursday

I am very proud of doing something new and silly

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so on our first date i made a joke about having a cardboard cut out of myself up on top of the walker center downtown and later on when we were dating dani said he was going to put his own cardboard cut out up there to be with mine and anyway it’s 3:30 am and im making a little paper version of the building that im going to print out tiny pictures of us and put on it for his birthday on thursday

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i like to pretend i already died and asked god to send me back to earth so i can swim in lakes again and see mountains and get my heart broken and love my friends and cry so hard in the bathroom and go grocery shopping 1,000 more times. and that i promised i would never forget the miracle of being here

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hot2go

Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, Amy Krouse Rosenthal

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its wild tho bc for like two years this dude would come into the bar and i would hope he might flirt w/ me or look at me and i would look at him and it was just 

pleasant

nothing more 

but i looked forward to catching his voice in the crowd or when I saw his friend I knew he was somewhere near  and he was Polite and Pleasant and it was nothing more and I would wave them over if they were in the other bartender’s line and I would sometimes charge them less for their drinks if only to show that I recognized them and I tried to remember his name because I never heard it out loud and it was that and nothing more and it was pleasant and nothing more

and now I want to fall asleep in the cradle of your moon 

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i really can’t believe i told the world i would not settle for lukewarm love and it responded by setting itself on fire

Like??? I’m not ashamed of my heart. I spent so much of my formative years feeling like my heart was a burden to others and to me, like it was this glass, filled to the brim that I had to carefully transport. Then as time went on, I realized it was a vessel overflowing with love and I grew comfortable in the way that I found the details of the world romantic and they would make my heart swell and flow. And now! Now I realize that what spills from an overflowing heart does not go unaccounted for!!

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i really can’t believe i told the world i would not settle for lukewarm love and it responded by setting itself on fire

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the fkkn d*mb*ss told me (more or less) that he is “”””inspired”””” creatively since we have ben “”””””””hanging out”””””””” 

which is so insanely dumb because it’t not like i’ve been pulling out my phone to write down sticky note poetry or like i finally have an idea for a short story i might want to illustrate that finally summarizes my experiences with my heart or anything like that no i just really like k*ssing him 

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