Canon: and so they never met

Fanfic: here’s a funny story

Canon: There was tension and pining, but they never even kissed.

Fanfic: Actually,

Canon: Torture the cinnamon roll.

Fanfic: Torture the cinnamon roll.

Canon: When they traveled they stayed in separate rooms

Fanfic: AND. THERE. WAS. ONLY. ONE. BED!!!!!

Canon: … and they were roommates.

Fanfic: oh my god, they were roommates…

Canon: They were international assassins who assassinated assassins.

Fanfic: But hot DAMN wait till you hear about this cafe they opened

Canon: They had a coffeeshop

Fanfic: but they were ASSASSINS

Canon: they were mortal enemies and attempted to murder each other on multiple occasions

Fanfic: bUT THEY GOT MARRIED AND ADOPTED CHILDREN

Everytime I reblog this has a new addition and it’s the best

Canon: They were straight

Fanfic: Lol

THE LAST ONE IS THE BEST ONE

I love fanfic so so so much.

Canon: Am I joke to you?

Fanon: No, just a disappointment.

rjjrrjrjfjrkekekdjtjjwjejrirjfksjwk the last one sENT ME

“When you skip the tutorial” 

(Source)

Canon: and so they never met

Fanfic: here’s a funny story

Canon: There was tension and pining, but they never even kissed.

Fanfic: Actually,

Canon: Torture the cinnamon roll.

Fanfic: Torture the cinnamon roll.

Canon: When they traveled they stayed in separate rooms

Fanfic: AND. THERE. WAS. ONLY. ONE. BED!!!!!

Canon: … and they were roommates.

Fanfic: oh my god, they were roommates…

Canon: They were international assassins who assassinated assassins.

Fanfic: But hot DAMN wait till you hear about this cafe they opened

Canon: They had a coffeeshop

Fanfic: but they were ASSASSINS

Canon: they were mortal enemies and attempted to murder each other on multiple occasions

Fanfic: bUT THEY GOT MARRIED AND ADOPTED CHILDREN

Everytime I reblog this has a new addition and it’s the best

Canon: They were straight

Fanfic: Lol

THE LAST ONE IS THE BEST ONE

I love fanfic so so so much.

Canon: Am I joke to you?

Fanon: No, just a disappointment.

rjjrrjrjfjrkekekdjtjjwjejrirjfksjwk the last one sENT ME

Fun family story: when my aunt was marrying her wife everyone was really excited but also dreading it because my aunt is known for her insanely long speeches so everyone knew her vows would be like 9 hours long so when it came time for her to say her vows she had a shit ton of cue cards in her hands and even her wife started groaning and my aunt took a deep inhale and then unravelled all the cue cards which were taped together and they all just read ‘HOT DAMN’ in giant letters and those were my aunts vows.

And now since I officially have permission to use this photo

GET FUCKED

@ other writers: how the hell do you write short things????

I think it involves blood magic.

@ other writers: How in the hell do you write long things????

It definitely involves blood magic.

@ writers: how in the hell do you write

its blood magic all the way down

@ writers: How do you learn blood magic?

it definitely involves writing

It feels like I’ve talked about this before, but to me the funniest version of Portal is if Chell is deaf.

Like, most of the major story beats, at least the ones that directly affect her, have a prominent visual component so she’s following along with the basics. But she has no idea who cave johnson is, or what wheatley was trying to explain to her, and she certainly wasn’t hurt by any of glados’ insults.

but the best part of this headcanon is imagining glados checking chell’s personnel file years down the line, noticing the word “deaf” for the first time, and just going “WHAT???”

Glados learning sign language so Chell can hear at least one of her excellent monologues and Chell just closes her eyes

oh

oh no

OH NO

Me, having a breakdown? After I compared all the bad shit Xena and Gabrielle have been through to the supercorp angst not even two days ago?? And now one of the Xena writers speaking about that exact thing???

More likely than you think.

that writer didn’t just spilled the entire tea… No.. She picked the fucking tea pot, poured it in a major big one, filled it up and slammed that shit on the entire fucking floor…

This is a perfect dismantling of the theory that the “writing just wouldn’t allow” them to write Lena/Kara together. At this point, I think they’ve missed the prime window to organically pull it off and should just say “we don’t want two f/f ships on one show” and let the shit rain down on them. Heck, I’d give them credit for doing a straight-forward (no pun intended) Myka/HG with L/K. Just say it would happen but y’know life and stuff just won’t allow for it to happen, even though everything about them screams endgame. What’s that? That’s not how W13 ended? Coulda fooled me.

Watching Jurassic Park and I have Opinions on this place as a zoo. Feeding the predators live prey?? There's other ways to provide enrichment! Also that enclosure is way too small for multiple large animals like that! Electric fences? Ha! Electric fences won't stop a fucking goat! Where's the zoo experts? Who designed these enclosures?? Were all zoos this shitty in the 90s???

This t-rex is so happy to be tearing a car apart and pushing it over a cliff! She's got so much energy! She needs healthy outlets! Where the fuck is her enrichment team???

Waking up on a Monday

Photo by Ryan Askren

And my heart

Epic is the grossest understatement.

ever notice how men criticize games like animal crossing and stardew valley on the basis of “the entire game is just doing tasks” without recognizing that “kill bad guy” is also just a task but violent?

”it’s so boring all you do is talk to people and do tasks so you can buy new things” yeah and all you do is press a bunch of buttons to kill people so you can buy new things? perish

my activity page has not known peace since i made this post i have hundreds of insufferable gamers crawling up my pant legs now but luckily i have a secret up my sleeve… i too am a gamer man. im immune to the gamer venom   

This has the same energy as that post that’s “Red Dead Redemption is just Barbie’s Horse Adventure with violence”.

i still really like this kara i drew a while back

⬅️dem shoulders ➡️