@thehalfblooddean / thehalfblooddean.tumblr.com
while looking up 1950s slang, i found the phrase “come on snake, let’s rattle,” which has 2 meanings: asking someone to dance, and challenging someone to a fight
and. hhhooooooooo boy does that fact have some Potential
Invite your crush to the dance floor, but instead they just fuckin deck you
Willow’s face be like I know things betch an’ you wrawng.
i just remembered annabeth took a poisoned knife for percy at age 16 and oh man
Michelle went at Kanye neck!!
I want this framed
DRAG HIM MICHELLE
boss
“your ‘thing’ with kim” 😂😂 she ain’t have to do Ye like that.
🙏🏾👏🏾🙌🏾
END HIM MICHELLE!!!!
THE DRAG OF 2015
always ALWAYS reblog. always.
omfg is this real 😂😂😂
JESUS??
JESUS????
i had no idea they were so frickin huge
I love them so much because they’re about as sharp as a baseball and their anatomy is ridiculous to the point of them literally being classified as plankton for years because they just sort of get blown around by the ocean and look confused, but because they lay more eggs than ANY OTHER VERTEBRATE IN EXISTENCE, evolution can’t stop them
Why is no big predator coming and gnawing on them?
Their biggest defense is that they’re massive and have super tough skin, but they do get hunted by sharks or sea lions sometimes and they just sort of float there like ‘oh bother’ as it happens
Even funnier, because they eat nothing but jellyfish they’re really low in nutritional value anyway, so they basically survive by being not worth eating because they’re like a big floating rice cracker wrapped in leather.
Perfect example of “survival of the fittest” NOT meaning being some hyper aggressive, muscular manly asshole. This creature fell upon the complete opposite combination of traits and just rolled with it and evolution was like “well, it’s working, somehow".
“detective terrible detective.”
shout out to my fave under-appreciated unbreakable transgender hero
The thing that gets me is he didn’t ASK for the impenetrable skin. Poseidon was just like “cool cool but you know what you need? skin of IRON. don’t worry bud it’s on the house”
so… Poseidon made his trans boyfriend bulletproof. alright.
I’ve been thinking about that last thing all day and
I’m pretty sure I have a new ship…
Sharing this here because everyone seemed to really like the first one and I’m so pleased with the way my dumb drawing came out
Too cute
this is the purest thing on the internet right now
real talk my mom never invaded my privacy, always knocked and waited for my “come in” instead of barging into my room, never tried to read my texts or journals or notes, and I always came to her with sensitive subjects; to the point of telling her I lost my virginity the /day/ I lost my virginity
what I’m saying is: respect your kids’ privacy and they will come to you with shit you’re worried about them doing
she straight up asked him if he’s the baby
when exactly is uptown funk gon give it to me?
saturday night when you’re in the spot did you not hear bruno
Uh huh, uh huh, life’s like this…
worst cooks in america is genuinely one of my favorite shows
one of my favorite phrases is ‘that’s a problem for future me’ because it combines two of my favorite things, mild humor and intense, panic inducing procrastination
unstoppable force (my compulsive need to overshare) vs. immovable object (my paranoia that saying anything will cause everyone to hate me)
