aspiring punk kitten

*does a gay little flourish with my pirate sword that makes the british naval fleet want to kill me*

Sanyo ICC-0081 "Mini Calculator": You can carry a calculator with you now, you never have to make big math in your head ever again!

Math teachers: We will multiply 14,762 times 2,853,654 among others in this test, no calculators allowed

Sanyo ICC-0081 "Mini Calculator":

Linguists throughout the ages: We have spent lifetimes gathering the significations of words and phrases in various language so everyone can appreciate them as well as possible.

Language teachers: Translate this text, no dictionaries allowed.

Linguists:

why don’t you build a little birdhouse in your soul and maybe you’ll calm down 

do not

What's gender?

Ghost type Pokémon, he’s purple and fat :)

me playing with a cat: hee hee toy on a string

the cat: what the fucks it gonna take for this bird to die

Advice to live by

When a gay goth girl walks by

british crabs amiright

i don’t exactly have what you’d call “plans” for the “future”, unless “disappearing suddenly under mysterious circumstances” counts, in which case,

these two seating together has provided me with so much serotonin so i decided to share

quick question, w hat are you rodents doing to my cat? 

Here, I fixed her. I don’t know why you think we’d believe that such a creature could exist without middle legs.

quick question, w hat are you rodents doing to my cat

Okay, this is silly. She’s only supposed to have four legs.

QUICK QUESTION,,

What him tongue out for

when you want to write something really deep but it ends up sounding like