when i take a selfie and it comes out bad:

So I was outside replacing the broken springs on my trampoline, as is routine, when I come inside and notice half my hand is covered in blood and I was just like “ugh this again” like I’m not even phased by this shit anymore. It’s just like that one time on seventh grade camp where I almost got my foot amputated because one of my friends pushed me into a murky lake and something attacked me lmao

Okay, so on seventh grade camp there was this lake (but it was actually a dam because it was man-made) and it was pitch black, like you couldn’t see shit down there. And I was with my (then) 2 best friends Catherine and Taryn. The 3 of us were sitting on this giant branch hanging over a part of the dam and Catherine was like “lol I’m gonna jump in” and she did and I was like “should I shouldn’t I” when Taryn pushed me in and I almost died because shit that water was ice cold. Catherine and I swam around a bit when the councilors called us back to land and I get out and someone was like “Kris your entire foot is bleeding” and I look down like “well golly gosh it is” and I felt nothing. Now, we were in rural South Africa and the closest thing to a hospital was half a first aid kit so there I was in the head office getting my foot cleaned up, still not feeling shit, when the lady was like “sweetie :) these wounds are claw marks :)” and me, being 12 fucking years old, was like “I get to go home right?” but no they wouldn’t let me :(

Long story short I got attacked by a lake monster and the most horrifying part was that I had to stay at camp for the rest of the week.

#actually the only reason why i remember that particular camp was bc that was where i began questioning my sexual orientation#i bet it was the monster#unbelievable#a lake monster turned me into a lesbian#and that wouldnt even be my weirdest story

Dog retirement home

Video

I would never stop crying.

Soumonkeysaysficus:

they also have a webpage! Here it is with donation link!

i really like looking at google image searches for “firemen rescuing cats” or something because you get super cute pictures like

AND THEN THERE’S THIS ONE

“THAT’S RIGHT TWAS I that set the house ablaze!!!”

i have been laughing for ten minutes straight because of that comment

IMPORTANT

Recently, my mum and stepdad have been physically hitting my dog, Loki. Whenever he would bark or hide under the bed, they would shout at him and punch him, sometimes even kick him.

My mum is threatening to put him down, and I know he doesn’t deserve that. I need someone, most preferably in Tasmania, to look after him, please. I don’t want to see him being put in another chokehold or being dragged out from under the bed by his ears while my sister cheers them on.

He’s a Border Collie x Black Shepherd, 7 years old, male, called Loki. He’s been neutered and vaccinated, is very friendly and good with small children, but not so much with other dogs. He’s rather big but physically healthy. He’s well trained but still needs a leash when walking.

Just, please, at least reblog this, I don’t want my dog to get hurt, even if it means taking him away from my parents and giving him to someone else. I can’t handle seeing him have to suffer and most definitely cannot respect anyone who ever harms an animal, even if its my family.

If you are interested in helping, please send me a message. Please.

geekandmisandry

Any chance you know some people in the area of Tasmania that might be able to help? You’re the only person I know on here in Australia.

I don’t sadly, but I’ll reblog this and hope someone does.

SAVE THIS DOG IMMEDIATELY!!! I’M STUCK IN AMERICA BUT OUT OF MY 1000+ FOLLOWERS ONE OF YALL HAS TO LIVE NEAR THIS PERSON! BOOST THIS!

Dido ☝🏻️☝🏻☝🏻☝🏻☝🏻☝🏻

I have a lowkey fear of being secretly watched via webcam do u know how bad it would be if someone’s seen my web browsing looks do u know how many chins they have witnessed

How do I get this job?

my mom just yelled “it’s called common sense” at my dog

My Dog Looks Like A Bear And Has More Friends Than Me

8/9 lives young • hardcore • makeup • scorpio • motionless in white • im not a bitch, im just honest

8/9 lives young • hardcore • makeup • scorpio • motionless in white • im not a bitch, im just honest

becoming self aware of your breathing and blinking is the worst thing

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Kim Culbertson, The Liberation of Max McTrue 

friendly reminder to do that thing your mum told you to do before she gets home

Reblog to save a life