Ah, so he hadn’t eaten lunch! Good then, she’d get him lunch before Naruto had the chance to. Naruto could get him dinner if he had to do something. But it would be nice to go on a group mission!

"That’s where we’re going! Normally I’d suggest ramen, but since Naruto is just gonna take you there when he spots you, what about a welcome home lunch at the barbecue?"

"I would like that."

The last time he'd had barbecue, he'd managed to piss Sakura off six ways into Sunday, though with his infinite lack of knowledge in social graces then, he supposed it wasn't too much a shocker. 

Now, however, he's much more cultured, and so much more educated in social behaviors. He wouldn't ruin their bond with careless mentions of Sakura's insecurities. Hopefully. He grips her fingers tighter in a silent prayer. 

"Would you be joining us for ramen, too, Sakura?" 

Just what sort of tailor did he find? Sakura’s never seen a tailor she’d describe as a mangy runt before. Did he stop by the Land of Rice Paddies to get fitted?

Now why would she bruise him right when he got back when he hasn’t provoked her yet? He thinks such terrible things about his teammate. Things that would probably inspire said teammate to cause the bruising.

She was cheerful for the moment now though, dragging him along and beaming over at him as she walked. “We should ask Lady Tsunade for a joint mission! It’s been forever since Team 7’s been on a group mission, right?"

"It has, yes." Life was good; he's got a whole new wardrobe, Sakura beside him, benign and a friend, and if approved by the Lady Hokage, Naruto next to him too. 

"Is it possible if we sat down for lunch, too? I'm rather hungry after my trip." 

Yes, surely standing and being fitted must have been…terrible. Clearly they should be celebrating he survived to come home at all, shouldn’t they? Speaking of survival, hopefully she’ll never get the idea his long absence was because he went on an international hunt for tailors to make him abdomen showing shirts.

She beamed as she tugged him along down the street. “Well, if it weren’t fruitful it wouldn’t be a successful mission, would it? All for the best it was, right?"

Surely. It was awful though, the poor mangy runt. Nobody likes themselves an extra large platter of assholishness. 

He blinked owlishly at where her fingers wrapped around his arm, gears cranked up to spin with more vigor. His arm wasn't crushed, wasn't even bruised. 

"Right, all for the best," he reiterates, voice tapering off toward the end as he shifted to hold her fingers in his. 

Send me a '✏' and I'll handwrite your URL or anything you ask.

                      “Reading..?" Under the shade of the tree Kakashi was almost perfectly hidden, but it was nothing a young ANBU operative could miss. “How are you doing, Sai-kun?"

"Splendid, considering." 

Sai bounced to his feet and slapped his book shut, glinting bright orange under the afternoon sky despite receiving shade from the trees. He tossed Kakashi a lofty smile and padded towards him, arm raised, flippantly waving his latest discovery. 

"I'm starting to understand how you could be so invested in these."

To Strike A Conversation || Sai and Yamato

Brows furrowed from his proud state at the small twitch and even less expression in the pale boy’s face. ‘Did what I say actually make him feel bad?’ The idea passed like sour milk in the recesses of his mind hoping to never see it again.

“It is simple and obvious, for me. But you have to remember that I am a highly trained shinobi and I can see that with a look. You ask a common person that you meet on the street to have them tell you what your strength was they would give their opinion, which could very well be spot on or wrong, or say ‘I don’t know’ even if they had their own opinion or could see you with their own two eyes.”

Neither one had a sword, but he had brought them out here for a reason. He placed a strong hand on Sai’s shoulder in hopes of lessening the unpleasant thoughts about the situation.

“Don’t worry, from what I saw you probably told her exactly what I would have wanted to say to her. How about a spar to take your mind of things?”

Sparring or practice always helped him sort through things so he would try to impart some of that philosophy to him.

“Yes,” he agreed almost instantly, too quickly to suppress the urgency that stacked higher with every self-deprecating thought. The motions that follow would keep his hands moving and not twitching from nerves, and sparring would be complex enough that his mind could only be centred on one quick flowing, ever changing thought process.

Sai pressed his lips into a brisk smile, a gesture to convince not only Yamato, but himself that everything was peachy, that he was okay. But already he was feeling shorthanded; years of ruthless, gruesome training later and his mood still sunk from emotional assault. It was a very grating realisation, and his knee jerked minutely.

He stood a few feet away in what would be a standard distance between sparring opponents, fists held tight in raised arms, feet dragged apart to maximise his balance. The whir of dust that gathered around his shoes was a familiar distraction, and the scent of trees and nature calmed him exponentially.

“Let’s begin,” he declared, and his lips cut deeper into his cheeks, because throwing punches and kicks was natural, and it was easy, and it doesn't require thought, but instead drowns out his doubt with sweat and satisfaction.

Experience doesn't come from books [Naruto, Sai]

If looks could kill, Sai would have been dead yesterday.As it was, Naruto set his teeth in a snarl, waiting for the old bat of a librarian to disappear back into whatever cave she crawled out of before, absolutely seething, turning on his heel to face Sai. 

"No she is not my type, you asshole!" He hissed,glancing back over his shoulder in the direction the librarian had disappeared into a moment before. The last thing he wanted was for her to return, especially since he had seemingly climbed the ladder on her ‘people i loathe simply for existing’ list. If he’d ever wronged her before, it hadn’t been intentional, and she should be the mature adult and simply let her grudge on him slide! Besides, he wouldn’t have even been promoted on her hate list if Sai hadn’t dobbed on him!

Speaking of which-

If he could get away with introducing his fist to the other’s stomach, he would have. Instead, he grabbed Sai by the collar of his shirt and slammed the slightly taller ninja against the bookcase, paying no attention to the shower of dust that rained down upon them. 

"The hell did you tell on me for!?"

Sai blinked at the abrupt change of position and the raw anger in Naruto's voice, and he worried for possibly breaching Naruto's borders of acceptability. He smile in conciliation and docilely allowed himself to be continually pinned up. 

If Naruto happened to throw a hit or two his way, it wasn't as if he couldn't evade anyways. 

"I thought it'd be funny, but the situation has sort of 'gone to shit', as some would say," he admitted none too happily.

As seconds passed, he felt choked and tethered, but the grasp on his collar hadn't increased in intensity whatsoever. Naruto's rage was thick and palpable in the air, and he felt immensely uncomfortable lingering in the same spot. 

Then he remembered the chapter on 'kiss and makeup' and he felt almost compelled to do as read. So he pressed forward and matched his lips to Naruto's in a silent gesture of apology. 

Experience doesn't come from books [Naruto, Sai]

Had Naruto expected Sai to pull such a dirty trick, he’d have paid closer attention to the particular isle he had been intent on hiding the porn in. As it was, dusty and deserted equaled the children’s section, but Naruto was hardly to blame, seeing as the amount of hours he’d spent here during his entire life could be counted on one hand- and even then he’d still have fingers left for twirling a kunai! 

So, when the librarian (who Naruto strongly suspected hated him just for the fact that he was Naruto) waddled up to him, lips set in a disapproving scowl with Sai trailing right behind, Naruto knew he was utterly screwed. 

"Oh come on!" He growled, not caring that his voice had breached the silence in the library. It wasn’t as though there were many people around to even care today anyway. This place was dead half the time and half-dead the rest! “What did i do now!? I wasn’t even reading this- he was! And here i am trying to be a good friend! Sai you dick, i’m gonna hurt you!"

“You’d better patch the silence back up or I suspect she will hurt you.” He jabbed a thumb at the woman’s temple, blinking at the height difference he hadn’t realised prior. But Sai figured she leaned more towards the cranky, grumpy nanny type, instead of the stereotypical sort of pastry baking grandmas, kind and gentle in demeanour. So he hadn’t bothered with dropping his hand, because it was roughly smacked away a moment later.

He watched in idle amusement as the librarian snatched the book from Naruto’s fingers without so much as a warning, and berated him for the few ensuing minutes for his lack of respect before leaving with a snarl – a fixture he found quite odd on a woman so worn. When she passed him, her aura was ominous, and it made his nerves skitter and his body to shift minutely in unsettlement.

“Quite a lady she is, don’t you think so?”

Phrases from Jiraiya’s book flittered through his mind in odd arrangements and he couldn’t help but wonder, “Is she your ‘type’, Naruto?”

After all, Sakura had a similar attitude that seemed to be on a constant simmer, ready to boil into fits of rage at a moment's notice, and he'd heard that Naruto had pined over her since their academy days. 

Who's a Dick || Naruto and Sai

“Not a word I said!” Naruto hissed as Sai repeated what the blonde had let slip, his face feeling like it was going to melt off soon, and he sighed deeply to try and cool himself off; he quite liked having a face, thank you very much.

He was going to say something else, but before he could two bottles of sakura-scented shampoo came hurling at him and he just about managed to catch them both. He looked at the label and made a sound that was something like ‘tchuh!” before pouting. Looking at the mere scent of the shampoo rubbed him the wrong way for a number of reasons and he marched to where Sai had been when he threw them, putting them back then stomping off after his shopping companion.

“Not that. Maybe get these,” He said gruffly, pointing to small gathering of clementine-scented shampoos which stood out amongst the others because of it’s noticeable orange colour. The agitation and heat on his face must’ve been melting his brain, because he was quite unaware of his actions which could easily fuel more teasing from Sai. His face twisted in thought at Sai’s suggestion. “Yeah… gift card… sounds good. Then can we leave? Unless you wanna get some shampoo for yourself called ‘I’m a massive butt so I might as well smell like one’? Butt-scented. Sounds like something you should use. Wonder if they sell it?” He said with a slight sneer, knowing that Sai would most probably come up with something to counter it easily but enjoying having a chance to be sassy too all the same

He scanned the Clementine-scented shampoo critically, unsure of his liking towards the scent, but the colour was so wholly Naruto, it would be a ridiculously appropriate gift. He plucked away the bottles in Naruto’s arms and replaced them with the Clementine-scented ones instead.

“I could actually use a new bottle of shampoo myself, but I doubt the shop sells anything smelling remotely of butts.” He canted his head in feigned obtuseness and suggested, “Maybe you could manufacture it, since you smell like an ass most of the time.”

“And for your information, my butt is not massive.” It was perfectly proportionate the way it is, and he felt and inane urge to huff in dissatisfaction. He also bit down on the impulse to cuff the blonde over his ear, and managed to reason it was not because it might seem overtly intimate, but because knowing Naruto, he would drop their entire purchase and spend the better half of their afternoon scrabbling on the ground searching.

Long hours with knuckleheaded ninjas seemed to send his emotional ineptitude reeling into nonexistence. It was equal parts disconcerting and settling, but it wasn’t an adequate place or time to mull over such thoughts, so he dashed them with a smile and proceeded to the counter.

“Coming, Naruto?”

Experience doesn't come from books [Naruto, Sai]

…what the hell had just happened? 

Naruto sat stunned where he had frozen up, lips slightly parted and eyes wide in surprise. Uh, had- wait- what!? 

What!? 

“W-what’s that supposed to mean!?” He snapped in a hushed whisper, face heating up ridiculously fast as he attempted to cover up his awkward blunder by snatching the book up and whacking Sai atop the head with it. He knew these books would do Sai no good! 

“That’s it! As your friend, i’m returning this piece of trash!” He stood up, book in hand and took a few steps towards the shelving, only to pause in his gait and glance around. Honestly, he had no idea where this piece of crap was supposed to go, but the lady was back at her desk and Naruto had no intentions of passing it directly to her. He was already labeled as a troublemaker- he didn’t need a pervert label tacked on! 

With an agitated growl and the setting of his jaw (teeth clenched and he swore he felt a muscle spasm in his temple) Naruto strode down a random isle, intent on shoving the book in some far off, dusty corner where Sai wouldn’t be tempted to look for it. Seriously, the nerve of the guy!? First acting like he was going to kiss him, then insulting him right on top! If they weren’t shackled by the library’s law of silence, he would have decked the guy where he sat!

“Rude,” he chided in delay. He pressed his palms over the desk to push himself up, lips taut in a cheeky smile, and strode right up to the librarian with a light swagger in his steps. Naruto’s becoming would be quite a monumental spectacle after all – monumentally hilarious, at least it would be to him.

“Excuse me, good ma’am, but I’m here to report one Uzumaki Naruto on reckless placing of an adult novel in the children’s book aisle.” The overhead tag said ‘children’, but libraries were few and far between in a shinobi village like the Leaf and were hardly sought after. Sai personally thought it’d be more adequate to alter the tag to ‘least frequented’ or ‘most dust collected’. Besides the few scrolls on jutsus or medical training, most others were packed with a fine layer of dust and scented of decay.

He garnered a disapproving squint by the aging librarian and she was soon waddling towards the direction of his pointed finger with angry mutterings under her lips. Sai trailed behind, catching utters of ‘delinquent’ and ‘good for nothing troublemaker’ but none of which a note of appreciation to his behalf.

“Rude,” he reiterated.