THIRST AID KIT | S6E07 | THIRSTMAIL, VOL. 4
We don’t like to brag but our listeners are the best because they send us drabbles that make us swoon and giggle and we immediately put them aside so we can share the wealth on air. And so we did it again…
We demolished the fourth wall to bring forth some of our amazingly talented thirst-buckets’ output. Quarantine has transformed you all from thirst-Padawans to thirst-Jedi Knights. May the thirst be forever in your favor.
So we got a drabble about John Boyega from Rae …
…and one from Mélissa about Andy Samberg…
…and Mélissa AGAIN with a Seth Rogen drabble…
… and one from Syahidah about Pedro Pascal…
…and this one from Brooke in San Francisco about Aidan Turner that we promised to post in full but had to cut short on air cos it WAS HELLA LONG. (you people do not listen when we say to keep it short… 😂)
I pretended not to watch Aidan as he deftly swept Sternos into a bin, while I attempted to roll the stained and crumb-speckled tablecloths into vaguely organized lumps. Every encounter had made me like him a little bit more, and this was the twelfth shift we’d worked together since Lisa hired him to help during wedding season. Lately, being near him felt like a study in how much of an ass I could make of myself while desperately trying not to reveal that something as innocuous as seeing him button up his standard-issue black catering vest sparked a florid blush that mottled my chest and tinged the tips of my ears pink. The anxiety of this devastatingly hopeless crush was becoming unbearable.
Aidan jiggled his armful of Sternos at me and nodded at the pile of polyester fabric, blasting me with the full force of his canine grin. “Need any help with those? They’re kind of heavy, not to mention super gross. I’m pretty sure I saw a kid blow his nose in that one.”
I tried to maintain casual eye contact and not stare at his gleaming teeth or the light stubble shading his mouth and jaw. The word “wolf” pulsed somewhere in the back of my brain, like an alarm bell. Wolf. Wolf. Wolf.
“I’m good, thanks. Although by the end of this we’ll be able to tell just how many people chose the fish by smelling me.” I laughed weakly at my own non-joke, feeling a prickling heat creeping up the back of my neck. Oh god. Had I just said the words “smelling me” to this man?
Aidan twinkled at me, a closed-mouth smile dancing on his lips. Ignoring both my rejection of his help and my reference to smelling like half-eaten salmon, he started loading the piles into the laundry bins in the back of the van. With his back still turned to me, he called out, “So, um. What’s your schedule looking like this weekend?” I immediately snapped out of a lucid daydream of us dressed like the cover of a romance novel, me stroking the dark hair on his forearms while he held me from behind, passionately kissing my neck. If he wanted me to take his shift at the Osario-Miller wedding on Sunday, he had another thing coming. I may have it bad, but I’d already had my fill of bridezillas this month. “Sorry, dude, there’s no way I’m taking your Sunday shift. I got burnt out from just reading the bride’s notes for the menu. What even is a ‘paleo vegan cocktail’?”
Aidan barked out a laugh and turned back to face me, “I don’t think anyone knows.” His usual cocksure smile faltered a bit, and there was a curious expression on his face I’d never seen before. “But, actually, I was wondering if you were free on Friday? My sister gave me tickets to this Shakespeare in the Park thing, and I remembered you said that you were an English major back in college, and I thought…” he trailed off, running a hand through his mass of dark curls. “Anyway, if you’re busy that’s okay. But if you’re free, I thought we could go. We could also get food before, if you want. There’ll be food trucks there.”
I was suddenly keenly aware of the wet grass soaking the bottom of my pant legs, the hum of insects and retreating wedding guests, the sharp smell of the disinfectant we’d swabbed on the chafing dishes. Is this what a dissociative episode felt like – an acumination of all your senses? From somewhere outside my body I heard a voice. Mine. “Sure, that would be fun.”
Brooke… you did that. Aidan approves.
We also answered a couple questions that came from right here on Tumblr! Hi, Tumblr! plus a couple of Thirst Sommelier requests… SOmeone was looking for a new crush to give them that Lin Manuel Miranda vibe (broad church!) and another was desperate for a replacement to fill the Terry Crews-shaped gap on her thirst vision board. We did our best and we think we gave a few suggestions that were happy-making.
Thank you all for sending us your thirsts, big and small. We appreciate you more than you can ever know. Y’all are the best. 💜❤️
You can listen to the whole episode RIGHT HERE (more ways to listen are listed below).
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Stay cute and thirsty, but also be safe, OK? Mask up, stay home, and save lives. We appreciate you. 😘💜