somethingtoprove reblogged
Emi Mahmoud, “Why I Haven’t Told You Yet”. Watch Emi’s incredible poem!
Writer friends: Is it normal for an lit mag to take over a month longer to respond to you than they said they would take? Also, if they said they would respond by Nov 1 and I still haven't heard anything, would it be super rude to email them?
Besides all the amazing food, these are the two best things I bought in #newyorkcity #thestrand
somethingtoprove reblogged
from my book of advice A SMALL BEAM OF LIGHT 10% off all of my books and free shipping using the code SHIPSAVE17 ✨www.lulu.com/spotlight/EmeryAllen✨
somethingtoprove reblogged
When a guy says he doesn’t deserve you, agree with him.
When a guy says you’re so much better than him, tell him that you know.
When he puts himself down in an attempt to get you to willingly lower yourself, don’t take the bait.
somethingtoprove reblogged
Dear Men Writers
Lesser known facts when writing women:
- High heeled shoes don’t become flats if you break the heels off.
- The posts of earrings aren’t sharp.
- Nail polish takes a long time to dry and smudges when wet.
- You can’t hold in a period like pee.
- Inserting a tampon is not arousing or sexual in any way, ever.
Feel free to add your own.
- Bras leave red marks on the skin under and around boobs and it is a magical experience when taken off.
- Make up can take anywhere from 5 to 25 minutes depending on how skilled you are.
- Taking hair out of a ponytail after wearing it for hours does not make it perfectly straight when it comes down.
- Hair when wet sticks to the skin it no longer flows, idiot.
-When women with long hair kiss, turn around, do anything, their hair falls in the way.
- Stockings are itchy and tear like wet paper bags.
- Pantyhose, tights, leggings, and stockings are each different. - Waxing hurts and leaves red skin for a while afterwards while shaving leaves stubble - Most can’t run in heels unless they have been VERY worn - Insecurity in appearance doesn’t mean “buy me a drink” - EVERYONE HAS DIFFERENT TASTES IN EVERYTHING
mistytang
-Having large breasts sucks. It sucks beyond belief. If a garment happens to fit your large chest, odds are it won’t fit the rest of you. Underboob sweat is real and terrible. Bending over for extended periods of time will tweak your back out. Running can be painful due to boob turbulence. Bras are hella expensive. Big breasts are not fun.
Putting a tampon in isnt a quick bend-poke-done kinda deal. It involves cubicle yoga, messy hands, numerous curse words as you realise it isnt in correctly and have to take it out and start again with a new one.
Yes to all of this. But also:
If her hair is in an updo, one does not simply remove a hairpin to send her hair cascading down her back. No. If her hair is an updo, it will take at least an hour and an extra set of hands to remove the 137 bobby pins that are holding her hair in place. Furthermore, there’s probably a can’s worth of hairspray in there, intended to withstand category 2 hurricane winds. There’s no cascading happening here - the best you can hope for is a misshapen nest of hair to clump and poof unattractively in the back while it still remains flat against her scalp.
This is one of the funniest posts I’ve seen in a while (especially if you read all the comments), but also really depressing because at 42 I still judge myself as having failed for not matching up to all these mythical stereotypes despite knowing they’re impossible
^^^This though
The odds of a woman having smoothly shaved legs and armpits are directly proportional to the amount of skin her clothing bares and/or the amount of fucks she gives at that particular moment.
GLASSES ARE NOT COSMETIC. If we whip them off, we do not become gorgeous fashion models. We become squinty.
-most women wear bras. Yes, even when they are trying to dress sexy. Because bras make boobs look perkier and rounder, which is something men apparently find sexy, so being a seductress or femme fatale is not an automatic reason for a female character to not be wearing a bra.
-a good bra will hide headlights, or at the very least drastically reduce their noticeability. A women with enough pointy nipple issues will opt for a padded or molded bra to hide them.
-women’s nipples do not automatically become hard pyramids visible through any and all layers of clothing the second they become even slightly aroused. They are not the female equivalent of boners. And even if their nipples do get hard, the bras they are almost certainly wearing (because even a goddamn succubus with big, honkin’ knockers for seducing men is gonna have those painful puppies in some kind of boob sling) should keep those pointy nipples from being visible to every other character in the scene, JIM BUTCHER. YES, EVEN LARA RAITH WOULD WEAR A BRA ONCE IN A GODDAMN WHILE.
ariibatchelder
- if you’re being tied up and tortured in a freezing underground dungeon, then you probably have more important things to pay attention to than how hard somebody’s nipples are, jim butcher
Well, it's official. I'm a spinster and all the straight men who don't treat women like garbage, a bank, or a mom are all married or dead. I guess all I can do now is pray that one of the good ones gets divorced eventually and hope I am good enough to at least be someone's second choice. #sadbuttrue #round1isover #atleastthefirstwifewillhavethekids
Deep question of the day: Is revenge a bad motivator if it causes you to do something positive? Examples: learning a new skill as revenge to someone who told you you were too stupid to do it, or losing weight as a fuck you to someone who treated you badly
When you're trying to get those trade secrets #dieting #healthyeating #food (Also, I'm joking, please no condescending diet advice LOL)
somethingtoprove reblogged
Last week, when a girl was murdered while jogging in Queens, the women on Long Island were unstartled and furious. They did not call to warn their daughters; they called their sons, sat them at the kitchen table and said, “If you ever, and I mean ever, so much as make a woman feel uncomfortable, I will take you to the deli and put your hand in the meat slicer, you think I won’t? You hear me? I will make a hero out of you. With mayonnaise and tomatoes and dill and onions.
Olivia Gatwood, Ode to the Women on Long Island
please listen to this it’s my favorite thing @buttonpoetry
(via read-me-to-wonderland)
(via buttonpoetry)
So I’ve decided that I am going to get my stomach removed so that when I am skinny and dudes finally wanna fuck me, I can tell them to go get their ribs removed so they can suck their own dicks
somethingtoprove reblogged
anorderingofchaos-deactivated20
Ingeborg Bachmann
somethingtoprove reblogged
dependent-boy
to anyone enduring a depressive episode: it’s ok. you’re not being lazy or selfish. your productivity doesn’t define or devalue you. you’re coping. you’re doing the best you can, and that’s ok!
Hey did you know that if you have feelings and cry when people treat you like shit that it just means you need pills to sit and smile like a ray of sunshine when people continue to treat you like garbage instead of them altering their behavior? I sure didn’t but according to my family that is what needs to happen
If you don't think men rule the world, try to go to a wedding venue and use the ladies room. Men definitely designed that shit because the stall doors open INWARD. Like really bro? I got 27 layers of tuile and taffeta and you think none of it will end up in the toliet with this set up? #youhadonejob #godhelpthebrides
Nothing like spending a night out with girls more attractive then you and watching them get hit on while all the guys look through you like you don't exist. But you keep telling yourself "It's okay, I finally have started dating someone cool, I don't need these guys." And then the next day that guy bails on you too. Can someone who is conventionally attractive tell me again how much looks don't matter? Because I would love to punch you in your face.
somethingtoprove reblogged
The Seattle Review of Books just wrote about Hanif Willis-Abdurraqib’s debut book: “The Crown Ain’t Worth Much is a brave, stirring debut by a voice beyond his years who is leading a new class of poets that are changing the face of modern American poetry.” Get your copy of Hanif’s incredible book here.