pov: you just open tumblr app

Happy boop day🥰

war never changes

your honor who gives a fuck. like for real

Tolkien is having his first ever egg. It’s. Not going well.

TOLKIEN IS A SNAKE. HES MY SNAKE. MY PET SNAKE. AUTHOR JOLKIEN ROLKIEN ROLKIEN TOLKIEN IS NOT BIRTHING AN EGG

every ghibli movie is better with some guys in it

need to be honest with you gals something really gay happened when I was at the gym today, I was naked after my shower when a topless woman walked over to me at my locker and was like ‘wow! Your hair is so pretty & vibrant!’ then she reached out and twirled a strand of it around her finger and I made this awful snorting laugh sound like hnkyhnhnhn said thank you then she smiled at me and walked off I don’t think I can ever show my face there again ☠️☠️☠️

uquiz questions be like: "if you were made of paper, would you drink chocolate milk knowing it would dissolve you????" uquiz results be like: "You have repressed feelings and trust issues because of that one incident with the carpenter. Words come naturally to you, but making people understand them is almost impossible. The autumn leaves have lost their cheerful glow as the years rolled by. But it's okay. Tell your grandfather that the day has finally come."

worst part of communities who are into environmentalism is the fact checking. alongside of reasonable beliefs about pollution and industrial development effects on the environment, there is always some Facebook antivaxxer type thing in there

there was someone saying that proximity to powerlines causes cancer and i was like...That Doesn't Sound Right so i looked it up and the first website i found that claimed powerlines caused cancer sells very expensive shiny discs that protect you from electromagnetic frequencies thru some undisclosed means

They also have shiny discs that generate a non specific energy field that makes your food more nutritious and stuff

fun fact! you can give yourself fun and cool titles like "director of quantum biology"

i also want to share this information (derogatory) about microwaves

breaking atoms apart is also known as Nuclear Fission. Your microwave does not 👎🏻🙅🏻‍♀️ ❌do this

Breaking chemical bonds is also known as Cooking. Your microwave does 👍🏻✅⭐️ do this

everyone knows this is the defunctland guy right

[teen sister in a 90’s movie voice] my pronouns are what/ever/major/loser now get out of my room

talking to a queer person you just met and slowly beginning to realize they're a category 10 normie is honestly horror movie material you're just saying your funny words seeing the recognition-as-human slowly drain from their eyes feeling the violins in the score swell as it dawns on you that this person has never even interacted with an armpit in a sexual context

OK kinda want one

For years I would look at posts and questionnaires about neurodivergence that takes about being so focused on something that you forgot to eat and be like, "Couldn't be me. Being hungry is so uncomfortable! Your stomach is growling and cramping? How do you ignore that?"

Then someone informed me that neurotypical people have a whole bunch of "hungry" sensations before they get to that point.....

They what

Yeah, I don't get it either, but apparently this is a Whole Thing.... Like they somehow detect blood sugar dropping and go, "Ooh, time for lil snack!"

See also: there is a feeling of "oh, I need to pee" that happens before "fidgeting around in my seat to finish this thing before running to the bathroom"

I read this and was like, "this can't be real" and then I looked for sources and like--

WHAT??????

what the fuck

character who’s villain origin story is having a job