Jessica Chastain

“I had no idea… all these changes in your body. It was beautiful to watch when you were pregnant, and now, too.” His hand massaged gently at her breast, and when he saw the bead of milk leak out of her, he couldn’t help bending down to flick his tongue over it with a soft hum. It had a strange flavor, not entirely unpleasant despite its strangeness. But that milk was for James, not him, so he reluctantly released her and let his hand trail back down over her ribs. 

Steve dropped his gaze to watch her hand move down his torso, and he sighed, eyelids fluttering for a moment. He had missed her touch. He’d missed her, being close, intimate. He brought his other hand down to Natasha’s thigh, let it trail upward to rub gently between her legs. “I’m glad you haven’t forgotten,” he whispered. Steve tipped his head down to trail kisses down her sternum, sighing against her skin. “I need you naked, sweetheart. Need t’see you.” His hands moved back up to the shirt he’d bunched up over her chest, waiting for her to sit up a bit so he could tug it off.

Natasha's eyes drifted shut when he lifted her shirt up, not entirely prepared for what he was thinking about doing. Then she felt his tongue and sucked in a tight breath that pressed her more firmly into him until he pulled away. She had never thought about it like this, about letting Steve taste what was meant for James, for the son they made. His curiosity and wonder made her feel like the first woman, the only woman to perform the task of making a child.

When his voice took on that pleading tone, however, she felt a jolt of electricity down her spine right into her center. Natasha sat up to let Steve pull off her shirt, then grappled for his. “You too,” she insisted, pulling on the hem and then going right for the button of his jeans instead. “I need to see you.”

The denim of his jeans was relentless against her tugging hands, only parting enough to gain a little purchase. Natasha gripped his bottom between jeans and underpants, then let go to help get her shirt over her head. His ring on her finger, his body hot and big and so close to her own, the child he put inside of her in the other room. Breathing softly over the baby monitor. She bent her head to bite his neck, then gently kiss the spot.

JESSICA CHASTAIN

Granted, he liked sex any which way with Natasha, but taking his time with her was always a pleasure. Steve let her pull his chin back and let his lips crash against hers in a slow-building kiss. He shifted his body up slightly off hers so he could drop a hand down to slip up under the hem of her shirt. His fingers brushed lightly over her abdomen, remembering fondly how big she’d been with their baby growing inside her. She had been so beautiful. 

Steve sighed softly against her lips and let his hand slide upward, fingertips counting each rib before his giant palm cupped her breast. Natasha was bigger there now, to Steve’s utter delight. “So beautiful,” he murmured, brushing his nose against hers as his hand gave the gentlest of squeezes. 

Parting her legs wider to give him more space to settle, Natasha breathed out a long sigh and smiled as his hand crept upward under her shirt. “Thought you’d like that,” she murmured against his lips. As if there were anything to complain about before; she knew her breasts were good enough before the baby, but had been interested to see how much he appreciated the change anyway. The ring on her finger scraped his skin as she slid her own hand under the hem of his shirt. “Just watch yourself; it’s been a while since I fed him, so I might leak a little.”

It was half in response to the squeeze. She felt that little hint of pressure behind the bud of her breast. His hands were so big, bigger than any man’s she’d been with before. Being with him made Natasha feel delicate in a way she hadn’t in a very long time, not since her training with the...well, with another man. A long, long time ago.

Even though James was only a mere six weeks old, Natasha already longed for the possibility of more children. The pregnancy had been risky enough as it were, and yet all she wanted was a house full of sweet soft things like her perfect son. There was little chance it could happen again. Finding the miracle drug had been entirely an accident, and the odds of finding more were slim to none. Instead Natasha pressed into Steve’s hand and allowed herself the little fantasy that they planned on making more children. After they were married.

She felt half a girl again. “I remember this,” Natasha murmured, sliding her hand down his abdomen to the waist of his jeans.

JESSICA CHASTAIN

Wake Up || Closed

James closed his eyes as he held her close. All he wanted was for Natasha to feel safe and happy with him. He’d do anything for her to be happy. “I wish you could have had that, too.” He never felt like he deserved her anyway. Neither of them would ever be able to get their fantasy lives, but they at least had each other. And she was as close to real, true happiness as he’d ever get. 

It wouldn’t be the same, but he’d give her a family if he could. They could be that suburban family with the mini van. But his life would never allow that. It was too dangerous. And with all the terrible things he’s done, he didn’t feel like he deserved that kind of happiness or life with her. 

Tipping her head to nuzzle her nose in the hollow beneath his jaw, Natasha breathed in of his scent and felt the last drops of tension slither from her spine. She melted against him like putty but the arms around him tightened. 

“I am happy with you, James,” she reminded him in the dark room, and pressed her forehead to his shoulder. “You are all I need, and I’m satisfied with what we have. I am. I swear I am.” Craning her neck, she kissed him lightly on the lips before settling on his chest. “Don’t ever think you’re not enough for me. We’re lucky even to have this, after everything we’ve been through. It’s not something I’d ever take for granted.”

Natasha stops a few steps away, sighs to herself. Shit. He’s right. She’s going to get stopped by someone, and she’ll have more luck making it to the throne room in one piece if she’s accompanied by someone who’s already been invited. At least this way, too, she can claim he invited her to come after she had to flee the country.

“Maybe you should go that way with me, then,” she says, jerking her head in the direction he just indicated. “Seems like a pretty big place. I’d hate to get lost looking like I just broke in.”