tomorrow

Always reblog NSYNC the day before May

Queueing this for next year

I’m sorry that people vauged about you and made you feel like that. Praytell what things you “found out” about me?

I sure as hell found out you moved on awfully to quick on from me even when you kept telling me you “didnt want to loose me” and you kept trying to keep us together

Im not a god damn idiot Charlie

I may have been one from being your fucking toy for so long thinking you actually loved me and cared about me

but Im not one now

I know you’re not an idiot. You’re a smart dude. And I sent the ask again on Anon because I didn’t know if you had blocked me or not. And I did love you and part of me still does but you ended things, didn’t answer my calls of wanting to talk about the matter and recieve closure for the both of us, and didn’t care when I had a panic attack that night. I still do have attacks over this but I’m trying to move on like you told me to. You told me to move on because there’s someone better for me out there. Have I moved on? No. Is tonight the first time I’ve been online other than to use Tumblr’s messaging system since the break up? Yeah.

No you don’t love me

you never loved me in our entire fucking relationship and Im not god damn dumb

I dont think you know that I still followed you on quotev till I came back on there after our breakup, you moved on quite fine

That wasn’t a panic attack, that was you trying to make me feel bad to give you another chance, I dont doubt you have panic attacks, I know you do, I have been on calls with you when they have happened a few times, Im not saying that you dont

but you were god damn possessive of me and did shit /I/ wasnt okay with but you still did it

and now that I realize some things you did whilst you were possessive of me and forced me to put away a part of me you knew I was capable of handling 

I now know I was nothing but a toy to you

and rust old trophy that you liked to continously kept dropping then kept picking back up going “oh im sorry” then do it again till I gave up

I dont wish nothing bad on you, and I hope the next person you find that you actually love, I hope they treat you good and help you

but we’re not friends at this point anymore, I cant find myself to forgive you right now, I just cant

I feel humiliated, I feel used, I feel unloved, I feel like Im nothing and I wont stop feeling like that for a long while

Wow. Just wow. You really think all that? Well you live with those feelings and thoughts because I obviously can’t change your view on how our relationship was. I’m just– I’m sorry that you think that me dropping absolutely everything and pushing my own issues aside whenever you were in a depressed or suicidal mood to focus on trying to cheer you up or calm you down was me not loving you. I’m sorry that I’m human and make mistakes; that I’m not perfect because that obviously means that my love wasn’t true. I’m sorry that I made my whole world revolve around you because I genuinely believed that you loved me and would be the only one who ever would. Sorry that I gave you space when you asked because I respected you and your needs while you never cared about mine unless I was on the brink of killing myself. I’m sorry that I’m unable to be independant like you are. I’m sorry for supporting you and your creations because I believed in you and your work. I’m sorry for worrying about your safety and having to question every night whether or not you’d be alive when I got online the next day. I’m sorry for ever giving a single fuck about you, Zachary. Because if I hadn’t, it would have saved you from having to make a half-assed attempt to commit to a relationship that you were never happy with.

Oh dont you dare say that shit

You called the COPS on me when I was suicidal when I told you NOT to and also were rude to my best friend when she didnt know what to say to help me

You belittled my feelings multiple times and dont forget you were the one to tell me that I was better off fucking dead

Nothing you did revolved around me, unless you counted pressuring me into sexual stuff and telling my homophobic mother about us when I obviously was scared of her, causing me to cry and break down on my road trip cause I didnt know it was gonna be okay with her unlike with my dad

I was happy at first, but every time you hurt me, every time I lost my trust in you

I became unhappier and unhappier

I still loved you even when you told me shit that made me want to die

when you pressured me into stuff that made me break down in tears after cause I WAS MOLESTED FOR FOUR YEARS STRAIGHT AND RAPED 

And I continously said I was uncomfortable with it then had to put it away when you were unhappy

Oh gosh I sure made a half assed attempt at our relationship when I pushed away shit about ME to make YOU happy!

I do appreciate the things you did do

but that will never make up for doing that shit to me

EVER

I called the cops because I didn’t know what the fuck to do! You were gonna kill yourself and I know that you have so much potential to bring to this world and I didn’t want your future to be gone! Suicide is one of the reasons you’re supposed to call 911 for help! You didn’t wanna contact a help line or website in which you could contact a councillor or some shit so I did what I had to. I have no reason to feel bad or guilty for trying to save your life. And I was rude to her. That I’ll admit but that wasn’t because she didn’t know what to do, it’s because she flat out told me she wasn’t gonna do anything to try and help! There’s a difference between not knowing and deliberately not doing anything. I never belittled your feelings! Yeah, I made fun of a few of your intrests but I was unaware you actually liked them at those times and I always tried to get you to communicate with me so I’d know how you were doing so I could try and help. And how many times do I have to say it, I know that me saying that “the world would be better off without the both of us” was hurtful af and that my mental state during that moment doesn’t excuse jackshit and I will regret saying that to you for the rest of my life. I never pressured you into sexual shit! I always asked if you were okay with it beforehand and even apologized when you finally told me when you weren’t. And YOU were the one who told your Mom. Not me. So don’t you dare pin that shit on me. YA COULD HAVE FUCKING COMMUNICATED WITH ME. That right there would have probs solved all our problems. If you replied or were truthful when I asked you if you were okay, if something was okay, if you were happy with me or if there was anything I could do to make things better in our relationship. But ya obviously didn’t. I KNOW YOU WERE SEXUALLY ABUSED. I KNOW. But I didn’t pressure you into jackshit. As previously stated, I asked you beforehand about shit and apologized then stopped when you told me that you were hurt or uncomfortable. And I did stop shit when you told me you were uncomfortable or that shit made you upset and you didn’t have to push stuff aside. You could have been upfront about stuff but you weren’t, even after I asked you to be.

Today’s date is 2^2/2^3/2^4

Squad 

#this is the best pokemon evolution ever

I’m sorry that people vauged about you and made you feel like that. Praytell what things you “found out” about me?

I sure as hell found out you moved on awfully to quick on from me even when you kept telling me you “didnt want to loose me” and you kept trying to keep us together

Im not a god damn idiot Charlie

I may have been one from being your fucking toy for so long thinking you actually loved me and cared about me

but Im not one now

I know you’re not an idiot. You’re a smart dude. And I sent the ask again on Anon because I didn’t know if you had blocked me or not. And I did love you and part of me still does but you ended things, didn’t answer my calls of wanting to talk about the matter and recieve closure for the both of us, and didn’t care when I had a panic attack that night. I still do have attacks over this but I’m trying to move on like you told me to. You told me to move on because there’s someone better for me out there. Have I moved on? No. Is tonight the first time I’ve been online other than to use Tumblr’s messaging system since the break up? Yeah.

No you don’t love me

you never loved me in our entire fucking relationship and Im not god damn dumb

I dont think you know that I still followed you on quotev till I came back on there after our breakup, you moved on quite fine

That wasn’t a panic attack, that was you trying to make me feel bad to give you another chance, I dont doubt you have panic attacks, I know you do, I have been on calls with you when they have happened a few times, Im not saying that you dont

but you were god damn possessive of me and did shit /I/ wasnt okay with but you still did it

and now that I realize some things you did whilst you were possessive of me and forced me to put away a part of me you knew I was capable of handling 

I now know I was nothing but a toy to you

and rust old trophy that you liked to continously kept dropping then kept picking back up going “oh im sorry” then do it again till I gave up

I dont wish nothing bad on you, and I hope the next person you find that you actually love, I hope they treat you good and help you

but we’re not friends at this point anymore, I cant find myself to forgive you right now, I just cant

I feel humiliated, I feel used, I feel unloved, I feel like Im nothing and I wont stop feeling like that for a long while

Wow. Just wow. You really think all that? Well you live with those feelings and thoughts because I obviously can’t change your view on how our relationship was. I’m just– I’m sorry that you think that me dropping absolutely everything and pushing my own issues aside whenever you were in a depressed or suicidal mood to focus on trying to cheer you up or calm you down was me not loving you. I’m sorry that I’m human and make mistakes; that I’m not perfect because that obviously means that my love wasn’t true. I’m sorry that I made my whole world revolve around you because I genuinely believed that you loved me and would be the only one who ever would. Sorry that I gave you space when you asked because I respected you and your needs while you never cared about mine unless I was on the brink of killing myself. I’m sorry that I’m unable to be independant like you are. I’m sorry for supporting you and your creations because I believed in you and your work. I’m sorry for worrying about your safety and having to question every night whether or not you’d be alive when I got online the next day. I’m sorry for ever giving a single fuck about you, Zachary. Because if I hadn’t, it would have saved you from having to make a half-assed attempt to commit to a relationship that you were never happy with.

WATCH: A Giant Pair of Pneumatic Articulating Feather Wings (video)

I’m sorry that people vauged about you and made you feel like that. Praytell what things you “found out” about me?

I sure as hell found out you moved on awfully to quick on from me even when you kept telling me you “didnt want to loose me” and you kept trying to keep us together

Im not a god damn idiot Charlie

I may have been one from being your fucking toy for so long thinking you actually loved me and cared about me

but Im not one now

I know you’re not an idiot. You’re a smart dude. And I sent the ask again on Anon because I didn’t know if you had blocked me or not. And I did love you and part of me still does but you ended things, didn’t answer my calls of wanting to talk about the matter and recieve closure for the both of us, and didn’t care when I had a panic attack that night. I still do have attacks over this but I’m trying to move on like you told me to. You told me to move on because there’s someone better for me out there. Have I moved on? No. Is tonight the first time I’ve been online other than to use Tumblr's messaging system since the break up? Yeah.

Maybe Anime wasn’t a mistake after all

Summer of Steven Schedule!

Here’s the schedule of new Steven Universe episodes that will be airing throughout the next month starting on Monday! 

The schedule is now complete!

Source.

The post has been updated with the final schedule!

I'm sorry that people vauged about you and made you feel like that. Praytell what things you "found out" about me?

How to help an artist:

Ditch the like button

No, seriously. If you don’t have money to help out an artist financially, the second best thing is to reblog all the things you like. While liking it does tell the artist that “hey I really like this!” It does jack shit because the only ones who will see that are me and you.

Why do you think there are so SO many posts made by people that are literally summed down to “please reblog my artwork I need the notes!”? Because no one reblogs artwork. Unless you’re a ridiculously popular blog with thousands of followers, you’ll only end up getting 1 or no reblogs.

SO HELP OUT ARTISTS AND PLEASE REBLOG OUR ART, BECAUSE WE REALLY NEED THE VIEWS ;V;)/

Artist Struggle

*Posts drawing that I’m really proud of*

Guys. Please, click re-blog. It helps way more than you think. Clicking like does nothing.

dont take me art, breh

SEVENTEEN FUCKING THOUSAND NOTES ON A SHITTY DOODLE I DID.

WHY

BECAUSE PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THE STRUGGLE, YO