VOLAR COMO UNA COMETA!!!

This was a complaint about a one-time incident of me having to get up at 3:30am to catch a flight idk about how some of you in the notes seem to be living on a regular basis

If King Charles dies on or before March 25th, 2024, he will technically be the shortest-reigning king in English history.

Anyway, like to charge, reblog to cast.

✨🦠⚗️🌿♋🧪✨DONT GET THAT CHEMO CHARLES✨🧪♋🌿⚗️🦠✨

the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ has only been actually typed once by a single person, everyone else who has ever used it has just googled “shrug emoji” and copy-pasted it

why repaint the mona lisa

As someone who has painstakingly typed it out because I forgot there were other options, I can guarantee my forgery was not up to the quality of the original.

did you install a katakana keyboard just to type it or did you have to Google “katakana alphabet” or something and copypaste from that

Pretty sure I just did a vaguely cursed bootleg thing like this:

-\_(“✓)_/-

that’s a guy who has lost control of his life. there is no more cheerful nihilism in his smile, no more mischief in his eyes. that’s an emoticon with clinical depression

reblog to cast level 5 spell: everyone who reads this gets a full night sleep

Pangaea was wasted on the dinosaurs. Imagine the railway network.

Pangaea was wasted on the dinosaurs. Imagine the railway network.

I hate it when I talk wistfully about the ancient world and then people are like “you wouldn’t survive back then” yeah obviously I would die immediately but do you think achilles would be able to survive in the modern world if he had to send one polite email? no

congrats to these people on being funnier than me on my own fucking post

Ha I wonder how many strokes the most complex Chinese character has like maybe eightee-

Has a Chinese son, names him bèng-dá, and he hates me

My beloved son 䨻龘 just trying to write his name in kindergarten

this email could've been a wordless locking of eyes across the street

citationless behavior

it's a weird emotion when somebody goes "doesn't this just shake you to your core and rewrite your dna and change who you are as a person" and your honest experience of it was that it was ok

Saturn Devouring His Son

I love when animals live in depictions of them that werent meant to be houses

I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me

you are making this so difficult

No experience more viscerally humiliating than walking through a heavily populated building with squeaky shoes. Look at me doing my little clown walk across the entire length of the building. Dumbass squeaking noises ringing out with every step. Sounds like I'm walking on two guinea pigs. I wish I was dead

would you let a dragon crash for the night at your place. not on your couch no. like into your lawn. or into your roof. please respond urgently i am losing altitude

Damn they were all about the glitter 30 years ago huh?

30?

Idk 32 or something I stopped counting

"how dare you hide this in the tags" -> "you sir have won the internets"

"none of these words are in the bible" -> "thats enough internet for today"

"op check your carbon monoxide detector" -> "were you on drugs when you made this"

and so on and so forth