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the one the speaker loves the best must have the perfect paradox

@jesterpissboots / jesterpissboots.tumblr.com

Hi my name is Gavin and this is jackass
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kaijuno

I realize this is an animal crossing meme but as an astrophysicist I was really excited for a second that someone was finally seeing the light on how fricking difficult and a huge waste of time it would be to try to terraform Mars

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exeggcute

any comparison between early 00s online youth culture and late 10s online youth culture is fundamentally incompatible as soon as you move beyond the similarities of “lol teens being cringey” or whatever because we are in a completely different media landscape these days. making heavily-edited cosplay tiktoks is nothing like curating a deviantart gallery full of anime blingees because the former is always, implicitly or explicitly, an attempt to cash in on internet fame while the latter was simply rooted in the deep twisted psyche of someone feasting on the dark side’s cookies

Back in my day we did weird shit on the Internet because we were genuinely fucked up, not for clout

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raptorific

discord server for silent video game protagonists

chell, doomguy, link, samus, and master chief are all in the server and not one of them has ever sent a message in it. they all consider the others to be their closest friends

there’s a channel where Red sends pictures of all of his pokemon and they all get a Thumbs Up emoji react from everyone else

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stability

This is why I strongly advocate for an alien invasion movie but set in like 1142. The Anarchy is in full swing. 

it’d be so good. Everyone would map theological explanations of the aliens onto them. It’d be so much fun. 

Aliens: Take us to your leader.  Jocelyn, Peasant: All right. Um, which one? Are you for King Stephen or the Empress Maude?  Aliens: Um– Jocelyn: I recommend Empress Maude. King Stephen is a lying usurper.  Aliens: All right, Empress Maude. Take us to her.  Jocelyn: I always new God was on our side.  Aliens:  Jocelyn: You’re angels right? Come to bring us portends and tidings of the divine?  Aliens: Or to massacre you. Jocelyn: That makes sense. We’re very sinful. We deserve whatever punishment it is God has seen fit to bestow upon us.  Aliens:  Aliens:  Aliens: Wow. 

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Video game things I’m good at:

  • Knowing every obscure scrap of lore ever introduced
  • Being pretty bad at the actual game

You forgot one: having fun!

I respect you

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Justice League Dark: Apokolips War (2020)

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falconfart

HE FUCKED KING SHARK?

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madamslayyy

The comments really are a gift that keeps on giving

IT GOT BETTER

John has also had sex with Swamp Thing. 

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avatrashh

He WHAT

Thought I should mention that sharks have two penises.

Yall missed the best part

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merrillyy
Dᴇsᴛɪɴʏ │ Fᴜᴛᴜʀᴇ Wᴀʀ Cᴜʟᴛ Aʀᴍᴏᴜʀ │ Tɪᴛᴀɴ
What does the future bring? We alone have the answer. It has always been war. War between humans. War between species. War between Light and Darkness. War is the fundamental fabric of the universe. Dare we defy it? Will you help us prepare?
FWC / Dead Orbit / New Monarchy
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