lmaooooo

alex jones is literally female coded because of his hysteria. but whatever

OP I know this is a joke, but just remember that if you go knocking on enough doors asking to see the devil, eventually he may answer.

What if you had one bathroom per astrological sign

Still better than gendered bathrooms because at least astrology is real

Water sign bathroom: Wah I'm so sad I just got broken up with omg there there ill help u get through this

Fire sign bathroom:

Why is this tweet killing me all day like tea

some “doctor” peoples who went to “medical school” and “understand the functionings of the human body”: Diet Coke isn’t good for you bc the chemicals destroy ur body

me: 🙄 okie dokie … quack…

user truewarrirorslight on page 48 of a forum I’m reading at 2:45 am: Diet Coke can interfere with how you develop ur psychic powers bc of the chemicals in it

me: yoooooo Diet Coke is Not Healthy!!!

TOP 5 MOST CRINGE SECTS OF CHRISTIANITY (YOU WILL CRINGE!!!!)

5. Southern Baptists

4. Jehovah’s Witnesses

3. Mormons

2. Evangelicals

1. Catholics

Like and share this CHRISTIAN CRINGE COMPILATION

via Natalie Portman’s instagram on June 8, 2020 (click for more information about what defunding the police means)

[Handwritten in pink and purple: “Do you smoke crack?”]

This is an example of hate.

national holiday

nobody:

half full water bottle left behind on the floor of a public bus: *rolls around*

OP is an optimist

Not to be pedantic but it took me years to understand the optimist/pessimist divide via the halglass because i literally always considered it a factor of time/prior state rather than 'outlook on the world'

If I fill a glass and drink half, that glass is half empty

If i only fill a glass halfway that glass is half full

Honestly that probably is important to the metaphor because if you have a full glass and half gets poured out you are going to have a different reaction then being served that way. Like one is “I was only provided with half” and one is “half was taken from me”.

who cares

what if the glass was a bong???

dude that would be fucking awesome

Vibe

i adore tumblr virgins

i simply cannot stop thinking about this.

You can’t simultaneously wear military-grade body armor and helmets and say “WE GOT BEANED BY BEANS” you fucking dipshits

+ bonus: