She sat on the chair “am… Jack… I don’t know did this is a good time but… I want ask you did you want go somewhere after work?” She smiled at him and shook her head “Sorry… I shouldn’t ask. You’re my boss…”

"I dunno if that's such a good idea, not 'cause I'm your boss but mostly 'cause you barely know me yet. I don't want a beautiful young lady like you making a mistake you'll regret after all." Jack said after a moment of thought, reaching over to ruffle her hair a bit. "Try asking me again after you know me a bit better, okay? It's not a 'no', I promise." He assured "Anyways, our next target is kinda hard to get to. I'm sure you've heard of the BP oil spill but it wasn't all because of a rude company and poor planning. It was mostly due to that but part of it was an alien artifact. We need to go get it before someone else does, but the catch is that it's in the middle of the Gulf. No one wants to head down there with me, but are you game? I could use someone to help me out." He added after a slight pause. 

The Captain is 'In'

"You really aren’t from around here." Tony replied nonchalantly as he eyed the man’s hand debating if he dare shake it. "The names Tony Stark. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. Just about everyone knows my name." His ego had always been a problem but he was after all speaking the truth. Everyone on the planet had heard about him or at least the should have. Sighing softly he firmly grasped the man’s hand for a quick handshake then let go. Tony rolled his eyes as he took note of the blunt flirtation. "Going to ask me out to dinner as well?" 

"Well, I've never heard of you, no offence intended, but then again it was supposed to be a good century before an actually decent AI was invented too. Seems like you're not the average genius if that still remains true." Jack pointed out casually and relaxed when Tony shook his hand. At least the threatening point of their encounter had passed and he laughed lightly when Tony took note of his flirting. "I don't know yet, would you even accept or would you try killing me for asking in the first place?" He joked before poking at his vortex manipulator.

Nope, still broken, as the Doctor had assured him. No fun toys without properly educated professionals, but that also meant the easiest way out was rendered useless. "On a side note, and speaking of well made AIs, what year is it and where am I? Last I checked I was in the middle of London, England, year 2014. It wasn't until the late twenty second century that a proper AI was made, one that didn't need constant repairs and could function on its own, at least in my universe. Time is rather flexible, though, so for all I know you've made a lot of things that shouldn't exist yet." 

"Your personal assistant…?" Sarina was surprised " Wow… I-I don’t know what to say. I think you’ll be pleased of me Jack."  She smiled.

"I'm a guy who is easily pleased, just sayin'." Jack warned with a slight laugh before thinking on why on earth she'd be so honored to be his assistant. He wasn't all that cool, he was pretty weird to, so he'd been told. That and he could be morbid as hell, but that was only if he got nostalgic. He sat back down at his desk and and handed Serina the folder he'd been reading on what they'd labeled as an alien artifact that had been found by an oil company worker. Oddly enough it had been part of the cause of the BP oil spill, but just a small part. 

Jack grimaced in sympathy when the doctor mentioned radiation, knowing how that particular fate felt personally. 

"Ouch, that’s never fun. Anyways, yeah, of course you’re allowed to stop by, I was just surprised, that and the crew were confused by the ‘strange guy outside by the lift’." He explained with his usual flirtatious grin. "Wanna come in? Ianto makes a killer cup of tea." 

#No but how livid Ten is with TenToo about the whole genocide thing #Ten’s furious and shouty and definitely going to take away TenToo’s car keys and ground him for at least a month #And then there’s TenToo with his faaaaaaaaace #Just look at the ”MICKAAAAAY!” gif #TenToo’s just giddy everyone’s there and alive and it’s a party in his TARDIS #he’s like ”Sarah Jane you remember where I keep the liquor right? #Jack make yourself useful and find some plastic cups or something! #Martha there are party hats in the third drawer on the console! #Rose you’re going to need party-appropriate clothes I left all your stuff in your room #you know I like that pink dress why don’t you go ahead and put that on #knickers are unnecessary! #Jackie you can just keep running straight through the console room and don’t stop until you find the broom closet and then just lock yourself right in there m’kay!” #And Ten is fuming outside and wondering how he got to a place in his life where he actually understands why his father was so shouty when he was a kid (via gallifreyburning)

This is the actual best.

((I wanna hug him, both of them.))

PRESS J AND THEN SHIFT R

WTF HOW.

"You lot? I assume you mean me and my team, if so I have no idea what you're talking about, Doctor. Nope, not at all." Jack chuckled as he leaned back against the mirrored wall that held the front office of Torchwood. He'd come out of there when he realized the Doctor was right outside their front door, nearing the lift actually. 

"So, it's been some time since we ran into each other, huh?" He asked to try and change the topic. The incident the other man was talking about had been quite a disaster, alien encounter gone FUBAR, though they seemed to go that way far too often. "How have you been doing? Other than, uh, regenerating of course. Wanna come inside?" He offered with his usual flirtatious smile, though it held a hint of amusement. 

The Captain is 'In'

"Again? J I thought I told you to secure the door…" Scoffing lightly as he set eyes on the man he rolled his eyes then pinched the bridge of his nose. "And where excatly is home? cause it sure as hell isn’t here." Snarky. Best attitude to have when confronting an intruder. Taking in a deep breath he tried to calm his anger before calling for his suit. "Leave." He ordered the stranger as he waltzed towards the door hoping the man remembered his way out of the building. "Now." He added once he didn’t see the man responding to his previous demand.

"Well, humans aren't anywhere near as rude and sassy where I come from, but I ended up near this place, so I came to check it out. I'm curious like that." Jack answered as he looked the stranger up and down, quite blatantly checking him out. He was shorter than the captain by quite a few inches but the man had the attitude to make up for it, he obviously was quite intelligent judging by all the high tech things scattered around the room, not to mention that AI he'd heard. Then he noticed the other's demands, though that made him smirk a bit. "Hey, hey, now, can't we talk this out like civilized people here? I'm not supposed to be here, I know that way better than you, trust me. However, you seem to be the smartest guy in the general area and I'm sure we can come up with a compromise that can help us both out. I need to get home, and I know some things that I'm sure you'd kill to find out about." The captain offered before he just offered his hand with a raised eyebrow but also a flirtatious smile. Old habits died so hard. "Hello, I'm Captain Jack Harkness. And who are you?" He asked with a brighter expression.

She looked at head then at Jack. “No, I’m not afraid, not disgusts me.’m Not afraid of blood, and I’ve seen worse things. I have no family but sometimes I go to the bar but it’s like I’m free. Dorzymać mystery I can.” Her blue eyes circled the Jack. “Is not that a lot of questions for a girl, Captain …?” She smiled at Jack

Jack couldn't help but smirk when Serina mentioned that he was asking quite a few questions to the young lady and it soon turned to a grin as he folded his hands on his desk top and tilted his head in curiosity. 

"You're right, it is a lot of quetions, and you didn't even answer them all in quite as much detail as I'd prefer but... you still answered them. I don't trust you at all, you seem too... secritive. You remind me of myself." Jack said honestly with a hum of thought. "Alright, we could use an extra pair of hands around here but if you are unable to pull your own weight we won't support you, you will be fired and we will remove any memories of Torchwood from your head. Understood? You'll also be treated like any of the other members of the team, just because you have a nice body doesn't mean you'll get special treatment from me. Owen, maybe, but not me." Jack said bluntly as he stood and offered his hand for a handshake. In his experiance this meant more to him than a promise and that shsowed in his eyes. "Welcome to Torchwood Sarina."

Sarina looked at Jack and sat down in the chair across from him. She smiled at him and put her helmet beside the chair.

"So know how to use weapons and pretty well know how to use a knife. As you can see I drive the engine so too have mastered the steering wheel." Stripped her leather jacket and hung it on the back of a chair. Again she smiled "That’s all, Captain …?"

Jack atually laughed when Serina asked if that was all. Oh, that wasns't even close to all he wanted to test. "You've got a sense of humor, I like that. No, that's not even close to all I'm gonna test today on you, Ms. Serina, not even close." The 'human' laughed lightly. These days he was questioning that human bit, simply because he coculdn't die but this woman didn't know that. He reached for something under his desk and pulled out a small cooler that he opened only to pull out a decapitated head of a weevil victim. He slid it across his desk in its plastic bag with a now neutral expression.

"Does that scare you? Disgust you, even? Do you want to run from that? Can you picture the crime scene that this head had to have come from? How much blood and gore would have been there? Could you analize it and stay sane? Do you have any family you'll have to keep your job secret from? Can you keep your current relationships if you do?" He asked, seeming to have an endless list of questions.

I assure you that I have everything I need. The next day Sarin appeared in the office Jack. Dressed in long boots, jeans, sleeveless Blouse and leather jacket in her hand she held a motorcycle helmet. “So … what do I do to prove that I can work here?” She smiled at Jack.

Jack looked up from where he'd been drinking coffee and looking over some reports on alien artifacts and his eyes roamed over the woman's appearance, but for once wasn't checking her out. It was to assess how good she would be in a fight. She was in good shape, the leather was a bit much but he wouldn't say that, the boots would have to go, it would hinder movement. He looked back up and gave her a bright smile before gesturing to the chair across from him. Hopefully he wouldn't have to give her an amnisa pill. That would suck, she seemed to hold some promise.

"How about you just talk to me first? Do you know how to use a gun, or any type of weapon for self defence?" He asked politely, keeping good eye contact and thankfully not staring at her rather nice chest.

My name is Sarina and I’m 23 years old. I saw you and your whole team. Want to know more?

"Sarina, huh? If you go through the front door to the tower you'll find a guy named Ianto, tell him Jack sent you and he'll take you to my office. Let's see if you're fit for Torchwood, I'm sure we've got an opening if you have the right attributes needed, if you know what I mean. We run a pretty grueome operation, oh, and if Owen tries copping a feel tell Tosh to taze him." Jack said through the intercom on the Torchwood tower that was /supposed/ to be hidden. He'd have to update the blending in plain sight effect on that thing now, it was supposed to look like the other mirrored pannels.

this has taken a century to do you know 

here’s a transparent gif of john angrily yelling through your blog hole

"Seriously, Doctor, just come in, use the lift or the door, the team knows 'bout you and Ianto will let you in without question if you want a tour. Just don't freak out about the flying dino if you do, that's Tosh's fault. I swear. Had nothing to do with that accident..."