also the way dylan got to keep roscoe the jeep we all knew who the strongest relationship of teen wolf was
WHEN SOMEONE U LIKE TEXTS BACK REALLY FAST
“Your teen comes home and you smell MARIJUANA now what?”
this calls for AIR GUITAR
𝑴𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝑴𝒖𝒓𝒅𝒐𝒄𝒌/𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒆 𝑪𝒐𝒙 𝒊𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔
I didn’t exist in your life until you read this sentence
Not true showerthoughts I see your shit ass posts every day
2020
hate when i go out in public and the public is there
do i have some great news for you
How about we vote in a law that puts a cap on how long a government shut down can happen… say 20 days… before the president has to agree to a budget solution or else the 21st day congress begins the process of impreachment because civilian jobs and salaries and livelihoods are not a bargaining tool for the president to abuse is order to get their way
If you aren’t serving the people then you aren’t doing the job of the presidency and you need to be replaced
… it’s 2020 and I’m still on tumblr
I Am A Derry Girl!
You’d lived away from home for a little over five years. Moving away was simultaneously the best and the hardest thing you’d ever done. You had decided to move away for university and stayed when you were offered your dream job. While at University College London studying German with Business, you joined the uni’s London Irish Society. This society linked up with a wider one, meaning that you spent your weekend’s brunching and drinking with some of the most famous Irish faces in the UK capital. It was great to have a little piece of home to keep you sane, and the people you came to met were a huge bonus. In fact, it was due to your friendship with some of these Irish high flyers that meant you were offered a position working in investment banking that you just couldn’t turn down.
You were fairly settled in your little routine, but that didn’t mean that you stopped missing home. In fact, on nights when you felt the most low, you’d settle into your sofa with your best friend and a Chinese takeaway and binge watch Derry Girls like it was going out of fashion. The only downside to your favourite TV show about your little city is that there weren’t enough episodes. Every episode, from the very first to the very last, made you laugh more than you thought humanly possible. Some episodes made you cry, as it touched on the issues your little country had faced. Some had you yearning for home more than before.
One night of homesickness was particularly bad. It was a Friday and you’d had a pretty shit week. You were feeling sorry for yourself, and to be honest you just wanted to be left alone. Nevertheless, you stuck on the first episode of Series Two and curled yourself up into a ball under your fluffy duvet. The next thing you knew, you were looking up at a pair of very hairy legs.
“Ni?” You asked, rolling up to look at him.
“Hiya petal.” He said, huge smile on his face. He was wearing sweat shorts, his Julia Michaels jumper and a pair of stupidly long Nike socks. As usual, his shoes were probably sitting in a neat pile at your front door. His hair was flattened by a Vegas Knights baseball cap, and he had bags under his eyes.
“You okay bub?” He asked.
You nodded, pulling yourself up to sit up straight. Niall had left a bottle of rosé, a tub of ice cream and an indiscriminate plastic bag on your dining table. “Whatcha bring me?”
“Chinese, our usual.” He smiled. “You’re still logged into me Netflix babe, saw you were watching our show without me so I panicked.”
You tried to smile, but instead, all you could find were tears. He squeezed down beside you and pulled you into his arms. His lips pressed against the top of your head as your head tucked into his chest. He held you and let you cry, until finally you subsided.
“I’m so sorry Ni.” You muttered, bringing your sweater paws up to wipe away your tears.
“Don’t apologise for anything babe.” He said softly. “I still have those days when I miss home so much I feel like my heart might explode. But ya gotta tell me, because then I can help ya cope.”
“Just didn’t want you seeing me feeling all sorry for myself.” You replied.
Niall just nodded, before lifting you off him. “Let me go get ya a plate darling.”
Almost three hours later and the two of you were on the final episode. Tears welled in your eyes as the girls stood waiting for Bill Clinton to arrive. Then your favourite scene came on. James standing on Derry’s Walls, proclaiming to the city that he IS a Derry Girl. You and Niall yelled along with him.
“I. AM. A. DERRY. GIRL!” You yelled, collapsing into laughter.
At that moment, you and Niall locked eyes. You’d been ignoring the feeling you got every time you looked into his eyes for some time. But today, the way he held you, the way he had been there for you, the way he cared for you. Your heart was soaring more than ever before. So, ignoring your better judgement, you leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. He didn’t pull away, but stared at you, a little in shock. Then, as if with everything in his body, he grabbed your face and pulled you to him. He kissed you like he meant it, and as he did so, you lifted your hands to run through his hair, tugging slightly. When he pulled away, he grabbed your hands in his before leaning in once again to place a soft, sweet kiss on your lips.
“You fucker.” Niall laughed out. “Can’t believe it took ya this bloody long to kiss me.”
“I could say the same for you Ni!” You replied, the biggest, cheesiest smile plastered on your face.
reblog to delete all incest shipping
yo okay wait how come nobody made this post. why is op nonexistent
god made this post
This is so
Unnecessary
how do you explain to someone that this is your sense of humour
“What could the audio possibly be?”
*unmutes*
“Oh,”
literally how can you hate this masterpiece
this website is annoying on a fundamental level bc the tagging sytem will periodically forget tags you use every day for no discernible reason but you’ll spell “photography” wrong once in a tag and for the rest of your life it’ll ask “photgrapy??? photogopy??? photograp???? is that it???? potogap???? you fucking idiot?????”
a concept: future jake and amy having a kid BUT amy goes into labour on halloween and jake has to figure out if amy is cheating him out of the heist or if he’s actually about to have a kid
bold of you to assume she didnt plan to get pregnant exactly 9 months before halloween so that its actually both
bold of you to assume it wasnt jake who planned to get her pregnant exactly 9 months before so she’d be thrown off by contractions
bold of all of us to assume Holt didn’t pick an exact date to compliment them both so they’d have validation horniness so that jake AND amy were in disadvantage during the heist
Holt: your heteronormative lifestyle choices will bring about your demise