someone said “i have a story idea. humans can live forever but that’s a backdrop. three satellites gain sentience. they love football. this will fuck you up for years.” 

Masterpost

(first image additions by @therealshootingstar )

“Beauty Tahani wants to battle!”

“Trainer Chidi wants to battle! …Maybe? Actually, hold on, he isn’t totally sure yet. Trainer Chidi is debating the ethical implications of Pokémon battles with himself. It’s… taking a while. Maybe you should just go.

Trainer Chidi… has a stomach ache.”

“Holy shirtballs! Trainer Eleanor wants to battle!”

“Oh, dip! Trainer Jason wants to battle! “

“Trainer Janet wants to battle, and she can absolutely assure you that she does not have a Maractus!”

“Elite Four Michael wants to battle! (He’ll meet you in the dot of the “i”)”

gerrymander -> gerrymeleon -> gerryzard

gerrymander -> gerrymeleon -> gerryzard

robert pattinson singlehandedly destroying every single joker before he’s even put the suit on

nooo don’t express serious emotions you’ve been designated “the funny one” aha

nooo don’t exist in a way that contradicts the one-dimensional version of you I’ve created in my head you’re so convenient aha

Bard: I’m going to cast Detect Thoughts.

Rogue: The only thot here is you…

im translating russian memes for practice and i... theyre so fucking funny

me: *flips pillow over to the cold side and goes back to sleep*

nurse who's been watching me in a coma for the past 5 years:

my esteemed rival,

my beloved nemesis,

dearly detested,

the homestucks ruined me

It’s missing my favorite incarnation: