a beautiful american woman curling up in bed with a hamburger bun pillow + slice of cheese blanket

Roasted chicken, ginger, daikon, shiitake mushroom soup with lime, cilantro, broccoli sprouts, and rice noodles

Thank u for this contribution

can someone hire me as a lighthouse keeper. my grip on reality is soooo stable and i will behave so normally under conditions of extreme isolation. and i promise i wont try to fuck the light

it really is insane how waking up early will grant you access to some of the most beautiful sights and sensations in the world that will make you want to live forever, but only if you overcome the gauntlet of a thousand razors that is getting out of bed early. truly one of life's little saw traps.

literally no better feeling than blurting out some loud dumbass joke with your buddies and hearing a total stranger ugly-snort-laugh as they walk past bc their own laughter caught them by surprise. find joy and connection in the spontaneity of strangers you son of a bitch. i fucking got your ass

do you think, for a potato chip, being dipped in an onion-based condiment is like seeing an old friend for the first time in years, both of you fundamentally changed and soon destined to die but nonetheless still here in this moment?

think again motherfucker

They hate this shit I feed them. Good

i mean this from the bottom of my heart: no one is impressed by your loud ass car. actually we talked about it and we all want you dead.

my astigmatism lets me see beautiful angels before i drive into oncoming traffic

I've asked this question before and been surprised by the results, now I have access to more weirdos it's your problem:

It is the middle of a Sunday afternoon. You have nothing on, and aren't expecting visitors, deliveries or post.

Unexpectedly, there is a knock at the door.

Not naming options to skew votes but...

I think there's something fundamentally baffling with the way most of you think.

where are the jobs for useless people who can't handle anything at all

politics apparently