@tayvinfanfiction / tayvinfanfiction.tumblr.com
I’m selling one ticket to see Taylor on Wembley, June 22nd. Section A3, Row G, seat 7.
I was going with a friend but now said friend is very sick and cannot go, so I have a ticket to sell. I’ll sell it for a very good price
Send me a message if interested!!
Guys, It’s finally done! This is the very last chapter of my Pre Christmas series! The chapter was so long that i had to split it into several posts. This is the first one and the other one will follow tomorrow. I just wanted to thank you, every single one, who read and enjoyed this series! I loved sharing it with you guys and I’m so excited to start new projects and share those with you too, even though they probably won’t include tayvin! So now, I hope you guys enjoy the last part of Tayvin ❤️
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12/17/19
Taylor awakens slowly, hears the rustling of a plastic bag and the soft laughter of her dad. She feels physically exhausted, is not able to open her eyes just yet. She hears familiar voices. She hears laughter. Family. The best feeling is to wake up next to the one’s who are the closest to you. The not so good feeling on the other hand right now is the intense pressure on her back. Taylor opens her eyes slowly, takes a deep breath. She’s still laying in the same hospital bed. Her family and Adam are sitting on the big table at the end of the luxurious hospital room. They seem to be having dinner and are chatting as If it was just another Sunday evening. Taylor moves only a little bit, but she can feel it clearly now. Her back is killing her. „She’s awake..“ is a murmur she notices while she decides to close her eyes again. She tries to ignore the pain, but it doesn’t work. How can it be so much worse than before she fell asleep? „Did we wake you?“ She hears Adam sitting down on the stool next to her. She opens her eyes again, lays flat on her back. She stares at the ceiling. She can’t move. It hurst too much. There’s no way she can move. „Babe?“ He asks again, this time a bit worried because of her weird reaction. „My back hurts..“ she breathes out slowly. Adam sighs, places a hand on her head. „Has it gotten worse?“ He asks, feels incredibly bad now for her laying in this bed while he seems to be as okay as always. She simply turns her head to look at him tiredly and nods slowly. Her eyes are puffy and she’s a little bit more pale than before. „Yeah. God.. I don’t think I can move.“ She breathes out slowly as Andrea steps up to her hospital bed. „Honey, I think that’s normal. I suffered from that too when I was in labor with Austin. I think when you’re fully dilated, the epidural will ease the back pain as well.“ She says to calm her daughter. Taylor just nods and closes her eyes again. She still seems sleepy to Adam. When they got to the hospital she was her usual self. But now is the first time that he actually feels like she’s in labor. She seems more absent. She’s in pain. Adam grabs her hand, that is laying motionless next to her body. Andrea looks at Adam and smiles silently. He is truly becoming a bit panicked now. „Do you want some ice chips, Taylor?“ Andrea asks slowly. Taylor opens her eyes. She’s still exhausted but sleeping seems impossible since her back is literally killing her. „No, I’m not hungry.“ She mumbles. Adam sighs. He was just about to say something when everyone suddenly hears a knock on the door. The doctor as well as the nice midwife from before enter the room. Dr. Tenderson takes one quick look into Taylor’s documents and then smiles at her gently. „How are we doing?“ She asks. Taylor’s head hangs sideways on the pillow. She tries to smile as well, but it doesn’t work. Her back pain is too strong to just ignore it. „I just woke up and my.. my back is killing me.“ she mumbles. Dr. Tenderson has taken place on a stool next to the bed and slowly puts on some rubber gloves. „Well, that’s absolutely normal. Let me check how far dilated you are by now.“ she says quickly without any concerns. Adam, who’s slowly losing his nerves while seeing his wife in pain takes a deep breath and places his hand on her hair. He gives her forehead a quick kiss. She is hot and a little sweaty as well. „Okay, this is going to be a bit cold at first..“ She warns while having her hands placed under the blanket. Taylor tries to take a deep breath. She never imagined the pain of giving birth to be coming from her back area. But it’s there, right on the spot where her pelvis is. And it stings. It stings badly. „Is.. is there any way that I can get the epidural now? My back is literally killing me.“ Taylor says, clearly out of breath. Adam immediately looks at Dr. Tenderson, who’s still examining his wife. If there’s anything that could make her pain go away, he wants it to happen as fast as possible. „Well, you are dilated by.. I’d say rarely three. Unfortunately, I can only give you any pain reliever when you’re having an active birth. Unless your contractions are regularly and strong, I can’t give you anything.“ she says, takes one more look at the monitor next to Taylor’s bed to check her past contractions. Taylor just sighs deeply. It’s okay. She can handle that.. „But Mona will show you some really small movements, that can help you ease the back pain at least. Is there anything else you might need?“ She asks with a calm tone and looks not only at Taylor, but also at Adam and Andrea, as well as Austin and Scott who still sit at the table at the end of the room with a slightly uncomfortable face. „No, thank you so much.“ Adam and Andrea both say and the woman leaves the room again. Austin and Scott slowly come closer to Taylor’s bed. Andrea has just given them that ‚It’s- time- guys‘- look and made them understand that it’s slowly getting serious in here and that Taylor and her baby need some quiet now. „Honey, we’ll go home. Three people in this room is enough for now. You’ll do so great and I’m so proud of you already, okay? I love you so much.“ he says, clearly more emotional than he thought he would be while seeing his daughter in this hospital bed, just about to witness one of the greatest miracles of life. He places his hand on her cheek and kisses her forehead slowly. Taylor, who consists of 50% hormones and 50% pain just nods and feels a single tear escape her eye. „I love you too, dad.“ she whimpers. Austin carefully gives her a high- five. „See you in a bit, mommy.“ he smiles slowly at her and Taylor wipes away the tear, laughing a bit as well. Andrea and Adam witness the sweet moment and watch Scott and Austin leave the room, including all the left- over food they had eaten before, when the atmosphere in the room was more relaxed - and Taylor hadn’t been in that much pain. „Oh my god.“ She suddenly says, her head turning red while she pinches her eyes together. The monitor next to her is suddenly going crazy. Peep Peep Peep Peep. Adam looks at her and the monitor terrified. Andrea just smiles calmly at Adam. „It’s a contraction, honey.“ Andrea says as Adam immediately grabs Taylor’s hand. She lets her head fall back to rock through the pain. „Deep breath. Deep breath.“ He says slowly, tries to somehow breath with her. She does what he tells her, holds onto his hand so tight that he thinks she just broke it. „Great job.“ He says slowly. The contraction slowly stops and Taylor tries to breath normally again. „You did such a great job, baby.“ He adds and tries to comfort her, while crouching down next to her so that his head is on one level with hers. She clearly is sweating now. A blonde strand of hair is starting to curl up a little and her cheeks are redly aroused. „That was the worst one until now.“ She breaths heavily. Adam just holds onto her hand and kisses the back of it quickly. He never thought that the entire experience of giving birth would be so emotional for him. But he already feels on edge. Just because she is in pain. „And you did absolutely amazing, Sweetie.“ Andrea cheers, sitting on the other side of her bed and pouring some spring water into Taylor’s glass. Instead of Adam, Andrea seems absolutely relaxed. It’s more than obvious that she has gone through this more than once while Adam and Taylor seem absolutely lost and scared. „Shit, my back is getting worse I think.“ She says and closes her eyes because of pain. Mona, who was standing right in front of the bed just sympathetically smiles at the singer. „Upper or lower back?“ She asks. „lower.“ Taylor answers without looking at her. It’s absolutely rare for Taylor to not look into someone’s eyes while talking to them. But she seems absent and exhausted. It’s more than obvious now. „Okay, can you turn onto the side for me, so that we can localize the pain?“ She asks gently. Taylor swallows, then opens her eyes again and looks at Adam. „I.. I don’t think I can move.“ she says with a shaky voice. Adam grabs her hand. „I’ll help you, baby.“ he says and slowly gets up from the stool he was sitting on. He kisses her cheek one time, while Andrea and Mona slowly remove the blanket from her body. She’s laying on her back with her huge bump while wearing one of the blue and ugly hospital gowns. Mona signals Adam that he can simply grab her arm and move her to his side without any hesitation of hurting her. While turning to the side, Taylor takes a few deep breaths. She starts to feel almost numb from the stings. She never thought she could be in that much pain at only three centimeters. „Here we go.“ Mona says and quickly exchanges seats with Andrea. „There?“ she asks, her hands on Taylor’s bare back. She’s still wearing her pink thong and nothing else. But at this stage, she couldn’t care less about anything except her pain. „Yes.“ She breathes, both eyes cringed together. She feels Adam’s hand on her hair, always stroking her. „Okay, that’s your lower pelvis. It’s hurting you because your baby is slowly moving down and your bones and tendons are stretching.“ she says. „I would suggest that we let the future daddy help us here.“ she says and looks at Andrea and Adam with a smirk. She obviously tries to soothe the situation, but the only one laughing with her is Andrea at this point. Adam nods, but has no idea how he could help her. „This is a pose that has helped so many women, even though the posture might seem odd for you guys.“ She explains and looks at Adam, since Taylor’s eyes are closed to somehow get through the pain. „So Adam needs to sit on this chair and Taylor, you will knee down and put your head on his lap so that he can massage your back. At the same time you take away the pressure and weight from your back so that you’ll feel a whole lot better.“ „Sounds awesome.“ Taylor breaths ironically. Andrea and Mona laugh a little because of Taylor’s answer and then both help her sit up in bed. As soon as her naked feed are hanging down from the hospital bed, Adam places both of his hands on her sides. She remains seated like this for a few seconds, tries to concentrate on her breaths. Her eyes are clinched together while her curly blonde hair is in a small and messy bun. Adam looks at her sitting in front of him. He comes closer to her and presses his lips onto her bangs. He remains there and gives her a long and tender forehead kiss. She must be in so much pain. Mona and Andrea witness the situation smiling and patiently. Taylor should take all the time she needs. „Ready to get up?“ Adam says quietly, with almost a whisper. „Mmhmm.“ She nods and carefully reaches for his hands. She slowly slips down, until her feet reach the floor. Adam holds her incredibly tight while walking her around the bed. „This one?“ He asks and points to one of the chairs standing in the big room. Mona nods. Adam can see that she has already placed a big pillow in front of the chair to protect and comfort Taylor’s knees. He quickly sits down on the chair, as Andrea and Mona help Taylor knee down in front of Adam. „Slow.“ Mona says and Taylor immediately rests her head on his lap. Adam naturally places his big hands on her lower back area and starts to massage it a little bit. Mona shows him some movements that can help Taylor’s muscles and tendons to relax. And Taylor immediately feels a huge weight being lifted off her back. She never would’ve thought that bending over and placing her head on Adam’s lap like a little kid would help her so much. „Oh my god, that’s so good.“ She breathes relieved, holds onto him with both her hands. She’s well aware that the two of them (especially her) must look absolutely ridiculous. But she has gotten to this point where she could not care less. She’s about to give birth to a human being. There’s no time and space for embarrassment. „Is that better?“ Andrea asks excited and Taylor just replies with a relieved sigh. „Like this?“ Adam asks, as he draws deep circles with his hands on her naked back. Mona nods and Taylor has her eyes closed again, but this time because she feels so much better. „Don’t you ever stop.“ she mumbles. Everyone in the room laughs a little, expect for Taylor, who has her eyes closed. She’s still sweaty but she seems so much more calm and settled than before. Adam continues his movements. He’d do this for the next 48 hours, If that would mean that she feels better. After only a few moments of relaxation, Adam feels Taylor slightly stirring. He understands quickly and hears the beeping sound of the monitor again. She’s having another contraction. Mona crouches down next to Taylor and Adam immediately stops his massage. He can feel Taylor holding onto him a little tighter. He hears her moan out the pain. Mona’s two hands are placed on her back and belly. Adam just holds onto her hands to keep her tight while having her head rest on him. „In and out. Your deep breaths are good. Just like that.“ Mona says. Adam hears her breath in deeply and moan slightly while breathing out again. He has no idea in how much pain she must be. He has never seen her like this. Never before and will probably never see her like this afterwards. As soon as the contraction is over, he feels Taylor move. She brings her head back up slowly. Adam just holds her arms tightly so that she won’t lose balance with all that baby weight on her knees. „I.. I need to move.“ She says out of breath „I’ve got pins and needles in my foot.“ Adam understands. He and Mona help her get up. „We have a tub in the bathroom. How do you feel about taking a relaxing, warm bath to help you dilate?“ She asks. „Oh, Taylor, that’ll help. Believe me.“ Andrea encourages her. At this point, Taylor would do anything to make her baby come faster or even shorten the time until she can finally have the epidural. „Sure.“ she says. Adam has helped her sit down on the edge of the bed again while Mona quickly prepares the tub in the bathroom. Andrea walks right after Mona to help her so that Taylor doesn’t have to wait any longer. Adam just looks at her and is a little thankful for the second of silence and intimacy they both can have. He places his hands on her big belly, right over the hospital gown. Her face is blushed and sweat is running down her forehead. She looks beautiful. To him, she has never looked more vital and healthy than right now. Her eyes are closed and she still focusses on her breathing. He kisses her sweaty bangs again and again. „You’re doing such an incredible job. You’re so strong.“ He whispers. She opens her eyes slowly and a few tears fall down. He knows that she has almost reached her limits. All he wants is for her to finally get an epidural. „Don’t cry, baby.“ He whispers and kisses her forehead again. „Does it hurt?“ He asks and she nods. „Here?“ He asks, both of his hands on the side of her belly. She shakes her head. „No, it’s.. just everything. Down there. This baby is tearing me apart.“ She cries. Adam wipes away some tears from her cheek. „I’m sure you’ll be at a five or six very soon. And then you’ll get a pain reliever and feel better.“ He calms her. She nods and focuses on her breaths again. Adam bends down to kiss her big belly over her hospital gown once more, while holding her. After only a few minutes, Andrea and Adam help Taylor move to the big tub slowly. As soon as they arrive in the luxurious bathroom, where really nothing reminds you of a hospital anymore, Adam helps her undress. „Are you wearing a bra or..“ „Yeah.“ She mumbles, clearly exhausted already. Andrea helps her take off the hospital gown and Taylor slips out of her thong as well. Adam guides her into the tub with his strong hands and helps her sit down gently. Mona jumps next to Adam to show Taylor how to slowly lay down in the water. The little pillow helps her support her head. Mona has managed to fill up the tub with just enough water so that her pelvis area is under water but her bra stays mostly dry. „Are you comfortable?“ She asks. Taylor nods immediately. „Yeah, it’s so nice and warm.“ She breaths. Adam is happy that this position seems to have helped her a little. She places both of her hands on her wet belly and breathes in deep. She seems to truly relax for a while. „I’ll go and get Dr. Tenderson to check on you again, okay? I’m sure you’re dilated more than before since the contractions are more regular.“ The midwife says and leaves the room after getting hopeful nods from everyone. „Do you want some water, Taylor?“ Andrea asks Taylor, but she shakes her head no. Her eyes are still closed while trying to get through her pain. „Adam?“ He turns around and shakes his head. „No, I’m good.“ He replies, sits on the side of the tub and caresses Taylor and her belly a bit. „Adam, have you eaten today? You look so pale.“ She says a little worried. She knows that he’s very empathetic and tends to be in pain as soon as her daughter is. But he really should take care of himself If he wants to be there for her until the end. „Yeah, I’m.. I can’t eat when she’s in pain. Too nervous.“ He says and Andrea takes that as an answer. „Fuck this.“ Taylor suddenly moans again, clinches her eyes together while trying to get through another contraction. Adam offers her a hand, but she rejects it and instead clinches onto her the rim of the tub. She moans a little louder than before yet manages to breath constantly. Adam sighs. The contractions become stronger. He has no idea how much she can take.
11.17 pm
„And one, two, three, four and breath out, one, two, three, four… great job.“ Dr. Tenderson says, waiting for Taylor to calm down from her contraction before examining her once more. It has been a rough couple of hours. The baby girl inside Taylor’s tummy has decided to take her time and the dilation has proceeded slower than the singer would’ve wished for. Adam, who’s now sitting behind Taylor on the cushion right behind her head in the tub, helps her to sit upright. Everything inside him is churned up. He knows his wife well and he knows that she is a fighter. And by saying that, he’s talking about the girl who’s performing for hours in high heels while having a tendonitis. He’s talking about the girl who has been playing world tours while being sick or jetting around the world with a stomach bug. She truly is strong, he knows that. But with that in mind he knows that this, right here, is her limit. He can feel it. She has reached a limit of enduring pain. She’s hanging motionless in between his legs. Too weak to talk, too weak to cry. Nothing but ailing moans escaping her mouth. But even that has stopped since half an hour. She appears absent to him, almost unconscious. Even Andrea is having a different look on her face now. She’s worried as well, always placing a cold wet towel over Taylor’s forehead to regulate her temperature. He watches the doctor examine her once again. This time he sinks his head and presses a long kiss onto her head, praying that she can finally have a pain reliever. „Okay, so now something is finally happening. I think you’re almost a seven. So let’s move to the bed and give you an epidural, Taylor. You’re pain will be so much better then.“ The doctot encourages her. Taylor just nods, then closes her eyes again. „That’s great, babe. C’mon.“ She feels Adam and her mom move her a little. It’s hard work for her to get up, even though Adam is basically the one making her stand up. Andrea and Mona help Taylor dry up a little and put on the hospital gown once more before slowly walking her to the bed. Taylor breathes in and out and tries to focus on that. Only breathing. Not the pain. Only breathing.. Taylor sits down at the edge of the bed again. She opens her eyes and sees Adam looking at her while sitting down on one of the stools in front of her. He smiles softly at her to relax her a bit, but she doesn’t react, only closes her eyes slowly again. There is no way that she can think straight any more. The pain in her uterus has increased to a level that is making it impossible to ignore. „Okay, Taylor. This needle will definitely hurt a bit. But here’s what’s really important.“ Dr. Tenderson says and stands behind Adam to be able to look at her. „It’s really important that you don’t move. Okay? The local anesthesia can be very dangerous, so you have to be absolutely still, okay?“ She asks and Taylor nods in between her breaths. Adam holds onto her belly on her sides and Taylor places her hands on his shoulders to hold onto him. Adam can see three nurses assisting the doctor while preparing the epidural. He still is incredibly nervous. Maybe because she’s still in pain or maybe because he shouldn’t have read all those articles last week about the risks of a permanent nerve damage caused by an epidural. The doctor slowly places the IV on Taylor’s pelvis area. Adam can see her face changing. She must be in a lot more pain than before. Considering the fact that he hates injections, he can only imagine how hurtful this must be for her. „Great job, Taylor. Remain still.“ The doctor guides her. Adam presses a gentle kiss onto her forehead. „You’re doing this so well, baby.“ He whispers. After a few seconds, the doctor is done. Taylor takes a deep breath and moves a little. „Okay, so you should notice a numb feeling in your lower area in the next few seconds. Which gives you a chance to relax and pool your strengths for the pushing part later, mhm?“ She encourages Taylor. Andrea and Adam helps her lay down on her back again. Taylor nods, doesn’t say much. Dr. Tenderson and the other nurses as well as Mona smile at her before leaving the room again. They want to give Taylor some time to relax now. Andrea grabs the blanket and looks at Taylor. „You want the blanket baby?“ „Yes.“ She says. Adam, who still sits at her looks at her again. Andrea places the blanket over Taylor and her cold feet. „How are you feeling?“ He asks, noticed that her eyes are more open again and she seems a little more conscious also. „It really is a lot better, already.“ She says and takes a deep breath. She’s incredibly exhausted from the last hours but the pain is finally bearable. „That’s good, baby. God.“ Adam says relieved and gets up to lean over her and give her a little kiss on the lips. „It was so bad.“ she just sighs, while placing a hand on her big belly. „I know. I was so worried about you. You have no idea.“ He breathes. Taylor opens her tired eyes again and looks at him. She notices his pale face just now and starts to look a bit worried as well. „Baby, you are so pale.“ She says quietly and raises her head a little bit. „I’m fine.“ „Have you eaten tonight?“ She asks him the same question as Andrea did before. Adam sighs. „I can’t eat when I’m nervous. You know me.“ Taylor just shakes her head. Sheseems worried and almost a little pissed. „Babe, you will go to that table and eat some of your stupid chinese food now. I need you here tonight, well and alive, and I’m afraid you won’t be if you’ll faint or whatever.“ She says strictly and a little off. Adam presses his lips together and a little smirk escapes him. He looks at Andrea and she bursts into a laugh. „The minute she yells at me again is the minute I know she’s her old self again.“ He laughs a little and gets up. She remains in her position and rolls her eyes while pointing to his food. „Adam, go. Now. Lily and me, we need you.“ she says. She definitely got him with that statement. He smiles once more, forces a kiss onto her lips and walks up to the table to get a fork. „Mom, can you take care of him next time I’m in labour?“ She asks tiredly. Andrea laughs. „I did ask him to eat something before but I guess I wasn’t as strict as you. I can still learn a lot from your parenting style.“ She says sarcastically and even makes Taylor smile a little. Then she sits down on the stool next to her where Adam had been. They both hear him hiss from the end of the room but Taylor ignores it with a smile. „What time is it?“ She asks. She still looks tired and off. Even though her pain has become less. „It’s 11.30, Darling. How are you?“ She asks her daughter. „Better. The pain is gone but the pressure is still there.“ „That’s normal.“ Andrea says. Taylor nods. „Yeah, I don’t care about the pressure as long as the pain is gone.“ She sighs. „Here, Sweetie, drink something.“ Andrea says and hands Taylor the glass of spring water. She takes a few sips and hands the glass back to Andrea. „You want some ice chips?“ Taylor shakes her head no. Again. Adam then returns with an empty plate. She can’t help but smile tiredly. He’s a tall and grown up man yet he behaves like an infant at times. „See? All done. Now let me be an emotional wrack again, please.“ he says. Taylor can’t hide a small laugh as well as Andrea. „Great job, babe. I’m proud of you.“ She mumbles as Adam quickly disappears with the dirty plate. Taylor lets her head fall back into the pillow. Her sweaty hair has dried by now and her little blonde curls have come to say hello. She places her hands on top of the blanket, takes a deep breath. She can feel only small movements of Lily now. Everything she has been feeling so far is her little big head pressing against her bones. It’s true that the pain is absolutely manageable by now, but exhaustion has come over her. She feels weak and also a bit nauseous. How on earth is she supposed to actually push out that baby in a few hours? She hears Andreas phone ringing and her moms voice picking it up. It’s her Dad. Asking how she’s doing. She can hear all of that through the phone. "Hi, my love.” Adam says and places his hand on hers, right over her belly. She opens her eyes again and sees her tired husband smiling at her. She smiles too. The first time tonight. She’s glad that he has eaten something, but she’s more glad that he’s right next to her again. “Hi.” she replies with sleepy eyes. He gets closer to her face and kisses her slowly. Slowly and deeply. He still can’t believe that everything here is happening now. That this day, this moment has come for them to officially become a family. “Are you sleepy?” he asks gently and Taylor nods. “I think I’m going to try to sleep a little, if that’s okay for you..” she whispers, eyes already closed, taking a deep breath and holding onto his hand. “Of course, baby. Take a nap. I’m right here.” he reassures her. Taylor just nods and slowly drifts off. His hand still in hers. Andrea who had just left the room to take a phone call now slowly comes back to the couple. She smiles a bit while looking at Adam and Taylor. Her daughter is sleeping. Exhausted and overwhelmed by the most natural responsibility that has been given to her. “Is she sleeping?” Andrea whispers and Adam nods. She slowly walks up to them and sits down on the stool on the other side of Taylor’s bed. She’s also exhausted, yes. But she knows that not only Taylor but especially Adam need her here tonight. She looks at his face and a little smile escapes her. He does not only look tired and pale but also terrified. Terrified and scared of everything that might go wrong. “In a few hours, she’s going to be here.” Andrea whispers with a smile. Adam turns to Andrea, was way too fixated on Taylor sleeping. In all his exhaustion, he needs a second to get what she just said. “Yes, I know.” he sighs, “Can’t believe it. Scares the shit out of me.” he mumbles. Andrea laughs. His choice of words was not the best, but she gets him. “You know, when Taylor met you she knew that you’d be her baby’s daddy someday.” Andrea whispers with a smile on her face while looking at her sleeping daughter. Adam looks at Andrea, a little confused but smiling. “What?” “You know, she just had this phase where she was hating on boys and wanted to stay single forever and.. you know the story.” she laughs quietly, “but when she met you she told me that she can see herself having kids. Before you, she never wanted to have kids because of all the people and media and fans and.. attention she has. But when she met you was the first time she ever told me that she wanted kids.” Adam smiles quietly, his hand still in his wife’s. “It’s the same for me. Before her, I..” Adam talks and keeps looking at Taylor. He can’t even recognize himself tonight, feels incredibly emotional. So emotional, that he’s about to absolutely open up to her mom about things that he might regret saying tomorrow. But he can’t help himself. Tonight is crazy. Tonight is different. “Before her, I always dated girls that were… mental.” he finishes. Andrea looks at him and starts laughing. “Oh boy.” Adam joins her. He’s exhausted and tired and scared but he has to laugh as well. “Yeah. Always chose girls that deep down I knew would never… not break me in some way.” he says slowly and quietly, has no idea wether what he said even made any sense. But Andrea watches him looking at Taylor. And she gets it. “And then suddenly she came into my life.. with her cat sticker phone and all the peppermint cookies I had to eat and the sandalwood candles and..” Andrea has started to laugh again. She knows what he means and it makes her very emotional, even though she manages to not let it show. “And I just.. I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t let someone love me in such a healthy and.. honest way. And so, I.. I tried to destroy what i thought I didn’t deserve back then. And that has been the biggest mistake of my life. But I’m so happy that I went through this because.. if I hadn’t lost her, I would’ve never changed. My life would’ve never changed.” he says, deeply drawn into his own thoughts while watching the love of his life asleep. In the most beautiful and peaceful state possible. Andrea wipes away one tear from her eye. She has never heard him talk so openly about their separation a few years ago. And it absolutely touches her. It touches her to see that he really has changed. That he has made a decision and that he regrets hurting Taylor back then. “Exactly. Everything happens for a reason. And maybe this reason was Lily, mhm?” she smiles. Adam now looks back at Andrea and starts laughing a bit. “Oh god, what’s wrong with me? m’ acting like your my psychologist or something..” he mumbles, clearly ashamed of how much he just opened up. Andrea laughs and grabs his other hand that is laying on top of Taylor’s blanket. “Adam, honey. This night is one of the most important and memorable nights of your life. As soon as this little girl is here your life will never be the same, believe me. So it’s absolutely okay to feel emotional.” she soothes him. Adam nods. She’s right. Everything will change. Everything.
This is it. Thank you to everyone for reading my series! Enjoy the very last part xx
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01:08 am
Taylor opens her eyes. She swallows one time, feels the deep pressure in her pelvis again. She takes a deep breath. The light is dimmed while Andrea and Adam sit on the big round table at the end of the room and drink some coffee. She has no idea what time it is. All she knows is that she’s incredibly nauseous. And cold. “What time is it?” she mumbles with a sleepy voice, feels to weak to grab her phone. “Your awake!” Adam determines and steps up to her bed. “One o’ clock, baby. How are you feeling?” he asks. He notices her shakes just now. She must be really cold. “Are you cold?” he asks, already reaching for her blanket. She nods. “I’m feeling really sick.” she sighs. Andrea now also gets closer to her and places a hand on her forehead. “We should let the doctor have a look and see how far along you are, mhm?” Taylor nods. She really is more pale than before, Adam notices that clearly when he pushes the little button on the monitor that is attached to Taylor’s bump. The heartbeat of the baby seems steady. That’s what’s calming him the most. “Mhmm.” Taylor quietly moans, both eyes closed and her hand on her bump. “God, the contractions feel so weird since I’ve had the IV. Just pressure. Soooo much pressure.” she breathes heavily. Adam places his hand on her cheek to caress her a little. Dr. Tenderson enters the dimmed room and smiles at Taylor. “How are you?” she asks. Taylor, who has just recovered from her contraction looks at her. “Definitely better than before but I’m really cold and nauseous.” she says. Dr. Tenderson sits down in front of Taylor while putting on some rubber cloves again before examining her. “Well, that’s because of the epidural. Your developing a little fever because your body is very confused with everything that’s happening tonight. And the nauseousness is normal as well. I think..” she pauses while examining Taylor, then looks at her again “I think, we’re ready.” she smiles. Taylor looks at her confused. The doctor pushes one of the buttons on the monitor and takes off the cloves. She smiles at everyone and suddenly turns on the big light. Taylor squints her eyes a little. “Do you feel the urge to push or anything?” Taylor shakes her head no. “Well, I think that’s because your epidural is still effective. You are dilated by ten and it’s time to welcome your daughter, Taylor.” she says smiling. Taylor looks at her in shock, hears Andrea cheering already. She then looks at Adam who has a big but scared smile on his face. He seems just as thrilled as she is, by the thought that it’s time. It’s time to have a baby. Just when Taylor was about to say something, Mona and some other nurses enter the room and help Taylor prepare for pushing. Taylor feels how nervous she suddenly is. Will she be able to push this human being out of her? She still feels incredibly weak. What if she won’t be able to manage the pain again? “We’re gonna prepare everything and come back in five.” the doctor says and disappears again. Taylor feels the blanket being removed by a nurse. Adam, who now stands next to her smiles excited and kisses her. “Just a few pushes baby and you made it.” he says. Taylor falls back into her pillow and takes a deep breath. She reaches for his hand. “I’m so scared.” she whispers, feels Andrea grabbing her other hand. “Don’t be. It’s going to be fine. Focus on your baby girl.” she advices her daughter. Taylor nods and feels Adams kiss on her head. One of the nurses put up her bedrest. She takes a deep breath but feels tears coming into her eyes. Maybe it’s because of her hormones. Maybe it’s because she’s incredibly exhausted and about to have her first child. A once in a lifetime moment. “No no no, none of that.” Adam mumbles and leans over Taylor to wrap her face in his hands and kiss her forehead slowly. He feels her emotions and if he wouldn’t fight himself to keep it together somehow he’d cry with her right now. Like a baby. “I don’t know why I’m crying.” she mumbles. Andrea takes a deep breath and smiles. She remembers so well what giving birth to Taylor felt like. Never in a million years would she have thought that she’d be here today, to witness this moment with Adam and Taylor. “You’re very emotional right now. And that’s gonna stay like this for a bit, trust me.” Andrea smiles. Taylor laughs a bit while crying and wipes away her tears. “How do I look?” she asks. Adam rolls his eyes and Andrea laughs a bit. “Fantastic. Why?” “Don’t want her to have the first photos of herself with her ugly ass mom in it.” Taylor mumbles and everyone, including the nurses, laugh. “You look beautiful, babe.” Adam just says, also gets impatient while waiting for the doctor to return. “Mom, can you give me the little red bag up there?” Taylor asks, pointing to a little bag on the shelf at the end of the room. Andrea hands her the bag, confused of what she’s going to do next. “No way.” Adam says as Taylor starts to take out her Dior concealer and starts to fix her face while looking into a tiny mirror. Andrea starts laughing as everyone in this room. “You are crazy, woman.” Adam says, looking at Taylor who is now applying some blush. “I look like I’m dead. Why didn’t you say anything?” she asks, acts a little offended even. Adam has stood up by now, took a few steps back and holds his iPhone up to take a picture of her. “This is what I’m gonna show my daughter when she asks me about that time when her mom gave birth to her and called the glam team last minute.“ he laughs as well as Andrea. "Honey, give me the bag now. C'mon. You look beautiful already.” she says. Taylor sighs and hands her the bag. “I’m so nervous. I need a distraction.” Taylor says. She sighs and reaches for Adams hand. He can see the fear in her eyes and kisses the back of her hand immediately. “Try to relax. Calm down.” he says with a soothing voice. Taylor nods. “Can I have a chocolate shake?“ she asks. Andrea smirks, as well as Adam. "I’ll get you one when you’re done, okay?” he smiles. Taylor nods. Silence. It’s suddenly so incredibly quiet in the room. Andrea stands next to Taylor while waiting for the doctor. Adam holds onto Taylor’s hand and kisses her again and again. The singer looks at her husband. A weak smile on her face. “Do you realize that we’re about to have a baby? What the fuck?” she says. Adam nods and Andrea laughs. “I know. I can’t believe it.” “I mean.. is it legal for us to have kids? Like, I can barely keep Meredith and Olivia alive. How am I supposed to keep a human being alive?” she says, a little panicked all of a sudden. “You made her. It’s going to be absolutely natural for you to keep her alive, believe me.” Andrea says. Taylor nods. She’s right. She should calm down now. “I can’t wait to meet her.” Adam suddenly says while looking at his pale wife. Taylor just smiles, also a little emotional. “Me, too.” She leans back for a second, enjoys the silence for only a few more moments. Then, she feels some pressure building up inside her. But this time, a lot heavier than before. Her hand wanders onto her baby bump. “Contraction?” Andrea asks, as Adam automatically places a hand on her round belly to caress her. Taylor, whose head is still on the pillow just nods. She looks a bit more terrified than before and opens her mouth painfully. “I.. I feel like..” “What?” Adam says a little nervous. “I feel like I need to push. I don’t know..” she mumbles, tries to breathe steady again. “That’s what you’re gonna do in just a few seconds. So that’s normal.” he says to calm her, mostly calming himself. The contraction passes and Taylor takes a few deep breaths. Adam presses a long and loving kiss onto her head. Andrea smiles and remains silent. She has noticed how the atmosphere in the room has slightly shifted from scared and ‘trying to maintain cool by making jokes’ in the last hours to them both being simply emotional. She knows why and she knew that this point would eventually come with Taylor’s labour proceeding. They both are just about to live through the most meaningful and emotional moment of their life’s. Of their relationship. Andrea knows that it’s her responsibility to take a step back and let them have these incredibly deep moments together. Together with their baby. The door opens again and two nurses help Taylor prepare for giving birth. Adam can see in her eyes how terrified she is. His hand not leaving hers for even a split second. “You’re having the shakes again, love.” he smiles a little. He has noticed how she’s shivering again since a few minutes. She nods and smiles a little as well. “Yeah I’m cold now that the blanket is gone.” In just that moment, Dr. Tenderson and two other midwives enter the room. “Taylor, how are you? Ready?” “Ready as ever.” she smiles emotionally and looks at Adam. He leans down a little bit and kisses her. Then she looks at Andrea, who has tears in her eyes as well. “Mom, stop crying. Or I’m gonna cry too and I have to push out my baby.” she says and everybody laughs a little. Andrea wipes away a tear and Taylor as well. “Okay, are you comfortable Taylor?” “Yes.” she answers quickly. The room is fully lit and she’s laying on the sterilized hospital bed. Her legs fully spread. Adam on her right hand holding her tight and Andrea on the other side. “Okay, let me make a quick ultrasound first and then we’ll do this together, okay?” she says calmly and Taylor nods. She tries to trust her doctor, who is already starting to ultrasound her big belly again. She can hear her baby’s heartbeat so loud and she already feels tears forming. This is too early, Taylor. You gotta do the work first. “Okay, so Lily is perfectly positioned. Look. She’s ready to be in her mommy’s arms.” the doctor says and point at the monitor. Taylor can clearly see her daughters head. She feels butterflies inside her stomach going wild. “Alright, so.” Doctor Tenderson starts and positions herself in front of Taylor. Two nurses are checking the IV on her hand she just got to stay hydrated. “Let me first check her exact position.” she says concentrated. Taylor can clearly feel her touching her insides. She rests her head on the pillow, breathes steady and closes her eyes. She realizes how exhausted she is. It’s the middle of the night. She has gone through hours of pain. Even though the hardest part is just about to come. “Okay. Let me walk you through the next ten minutes Taylor.” she says. Taylor looks at her. “Ten? You’re optimistic.” she says, makes everybody laugh. Andrea, who holds her daughters hand just as excited as everyone else in the room, looks at Adam. He looks incredibly scared. “If you do exactly what I tell you, it’ll be less than ten. But you have to fight for your baby. You have to put in all the strength you have. Alright?” she says. Taylor looks at her. She nods. She really does appreciate the doctors way of handling this situation. She’s honest but calming. A good combo. Taylor looks up to Adam. She swallows. She never dreamed of this moment to come. Never. “I love you.” he says and leans down to kiss her. Taylor feels tears building up in her eyes. “I love you too.” she says and then reaches for Adams hand again. She doesn’t care at all that all the people in this room are witnessing this intimate moment between them. He holds her right hand tight with one hand and places the other one on on the back of the bed. He might need this one later to support her head. Taylor looks at Dr. Tenderson again after a few little tears have already made their way down her cheeks. “Sorry, I’m so emotional.” she laughs a little insecure. Dr. Tenderson smiles at her while having a hand in rubber cloves placed on her naked leg. “That’s absolutely fine. So, here’s what we’re gonna do. I’m gonna count down from 3 to 1. And at 1 you’ll start pushing. Focus on working with your lower muscles. And as soon as you start pushing I’ll count to 4. And then you get a quick break and same procedure again. Okay?” Taylor nods. She looks at Adam again. She’s terrified. If he wouldn’t be here with her, she couldn’t do it. “Lets go baby.” he calms her, kisses her head again for a second. “Okay. And. 3..2..1” Taylor starts pushing. Adam holds her hand that is almost crashing his. She still seems fine, puts in a lot of work. Then she’s done. Dr. Tenderson nods. “Okay, breath in and out. And.. 3..2..1” She pushes again. This time a little harder. Her eyes are closed. As soon as she stops an exhausted sigh leaves her mouth. Adam holds tight onto her hand. His head is now behind her head, right on her neck where some little sweaty curly hair come out of her small bun. She’s exhausted, can barely hold her head upright anymore. “Okay, and again.” Dr. Tenderson says. At this point, Taylor is truly exhausted. Her sighs have turned into moans. Moans of “this hurts so much” and cries. Cries that Adam would love to cure but he can’t. All he can do is watch her fight her way through all the pushes, sweating and cursing while he is only holding her hand and helping her through it, somehow. His hand is supporting her head while sentences like “one more time, baby. You can do this” and “m’ so proud of you. C'mon baby.” escape his mouth. “I.. I can’t.” she cries, Dr. Tenderson looks at her. “Taylor, I can feel your baby’s head. I need a long push. C'mon. 3..2..” Taylor moans and cries, feels like everything in her body is being destroyed. She reaches that point where her strength is relentlessly gone. She reaches that point and pushes through. And then, suddenly, it’s going fast. Too fast. There’s a loud baby’s cry and blood on the bed. There’s her mother’s “oh my god.” and suddenly there’s a baby on her chest. A crying beautiful baby. In that moment, she realizes. “Hi baby, Hi.“ she cries, her hands shaking while wrapping her arms around her baby’s naked body. "Hi, I’m your mommy. I love you.. you’re here.” she cries. The nurses immediately cover the little body and Taylor feels the baby’s head pressed into her neck. Tears are streaming down her face. She looks up at Adam. Her chest is moving up and down. She’s breathing so fast while crying almost hysterically. “Congratulations.” the doctor smiles. “Baby..” Taylor sobs while looking at Adam. He looks pale. He’s smiling brighter as ever. His left hand lands on her head and his right one is shyly placed on his daughters tiny back. The baby’s cries got less. Taylor just smiles at him while feeling her baby wrapped up on her naked skin. “I love you so much. I..” he doesn’t know what to say, feels like he has forgotten how to build a full sentence. He kisses Taylor. Sweat and tears can be tasted in his mouth. Andrea just stands next to the three in awe. She wipes away her tears as Taylor looks at her. “Mom, she’s perfect. Have you seen her? She looks just like Adam. Oh my god.” Taylor cries and Andrea nods. “Honey, I’m so proud of you.” “Is she sleeping?” Taylor asks, still absolutely shaken from what has just happened. Her hands are shaking and her voice as well. She moves a bit to face the little red face. “No, she’s just looking around, mhm?” Andrea looks at the little baby, whose eyes seem a little bothered with the bright lighting in the hospital room. Taylor sinks her head and kisses the little forehead. Again and again and again. She doesn’t even notice the nurses cleaning her up. Everything around her seems meaningless in this moment. All she feels is the warmth of her baby and her tears that stream down her face. “I love you.“ She whispers and kisses the little head again „I love you so so much..” she says again and again. Adam just stands here. His hand not leaving Lily’s back. Not even for a split second. He can only observe, doesn’t feel able to move or speak or think. This is it. This is the biggest rush of his life. “Taylor, we need to examine her real quick. She’ll stay in the room with you okay? We’ll do it right here, and then you get her back chest to chest immediately.” the doctor says very carefully. Taylor doesn’t want to let go. She feels her arms not being able to move away from her baby. She knows that she has to let go but she can’t. “Okay.” she sobs then, carefully lets the doctor take the little bundle of love from her chest. Lily immediately starts crying again. Sharp cries that almost kill Taylor inside. But what she didn’t realize in her shock of giving Lily away, was Adam immediately getting up and walking right to where the doctors are. She smiles. She knew he couldn’t leave her alone for a second. “What are you doing?” she asks him while feeling some nurses still cleaning her legs. “I just want to look after her.” he mumbles protectively, not looking at Taylor but standing right behind the doctor who is examining the naked baby. He looks at this little human being and he can’t believe it. Taylor was right. Her eyes. Her ears. Her lips. She looks just like him. Just like him. “She’s got my nose. Poor thing.” he says then, making everybody laugh. “She’s heavy, Taylor.” the doctor says happily. “And she seems absolutely healthy!” she adds. Taylor just closes her eyes for a second and takes a deep breath while smiling. Thank you Jesus. She then opens her eyes again and looks at her mom. Andrea just sits next to the bed and smiles. So bright. “Let me call Daddy and Austin and Pam and.. everyone.” she says. Taylor laughs and nods. Andrea kisses her cheek first before getting up. “I love you so much. I’m so proud of you.” she says. Taylor smiles thankfully while watching her leave the room. A nurse helps Taylor to change into a new hospital gown since her recent one is ruined with blood. Then, Dr. Tenderson comes back, with a little baby on her arm, that is wrapped into a white blanket. She’s crying loudly. Taylor immediately reaches for her. “Come here. Come to me.” she says with a longing voice and takes Lily from the doctor. The baby immediately calms down as soon as she lays her head on Taylor’s chest. The doctor smiles at the parents. “She’s healthy. Congratulations!” she smiles. “Thank you so so much.” Taylor smiles at the doctor, then presses her head against her baby’s head once more. She needs the proximity just as much as the new born in this moment. Adam sits down next to his two girls again and takes a deep breath. He watches Taylor mumble little ‚I love you’s‘ to their baby girl again and again until she seems to have fallen asleep. He has never seen Taylor this happy. She’s absolutely exhausted but happier than ever in her life. And that, right there, is where it hits him. He places a hand in front of his mouth, seems to realize just now what has happened in the last minutes. Everything in his life, that he ever dreamed of, is right in front of him. This is it. He feels tears running down his cheeks, as Taylor takes a quick look at him and smiles in shock when she sees him like this. „Baby, what..“ she reaches for him with her right hand while having her baby sleep on her chest. She has never seen him like this. He’s full on crying while looking at her. She realizes that he was in shock before. That his calm and steady reaction at first was just the shock. Taylor feels him sobbing quietly. She feels her own tears streaming down as well. Her hand lands on his cheek. „Don’t cry, baby. Don’t..“ „This is it.“ he says then, looks at her and at his sleeping daughter, „This is the best moment of my life. This is the reason for everything.“ he cries and looks deeply into Taylor’s eyes. He can see her tears as well but he sees more than that. Love. True Love…
02/25/15
Adam takes another sip of his vodka cranberry. He can feel a slight buzz by now, no wonders. He has no idea, when he last attended an event at Omnia without performing himself. It’s a nice perspective to be down there, every once in a while. It’s nice to feel the energy of everyone, instead of being alone on a Podest far away from everyone. Even though he appreciates his view from the side of the club, he must admit that most of the girls, dressed in short dresses and dancing a little drunk, are centered far away from the VIP session. What a shame that he and his friends must endure the party from one of the better served parts of the club tonight. Adam observes Charlie talking to some guy from Omnia, telling one of his stupid jokes from back in the days when he was an overweight kid living in England. Adam almost feels a little embarrassed, just laughs at Charlie. He then looks at the big table in the section next to them. Burns had already mentioned before, that some secretive A- listed celeb has attended the VIP area as well. And he’s reminded of that remark again as he sees a few big security guys standing in front of the table of girls. He takes a glance at the group of women. All he sees is a bunch of supermodels sitting there, laughing. He knows most of them, yes. But not personally at all. All he knows is that he has seen every single one of those tall girl in some fashion magazine. He smirks desinterested. Stupid blonde models. All of them are drunk already, laughing and dancing and being a little more than upper class embarrassing. Two blokes, that seem to be interested in the bunch of supermodels sit down next to them. The next thing he observes though is making him laugh. One of the blonde girls, someone somehow familiar to him, stops one of the other girls from pouring her expensive drink over one of her friends heads. They must all be wasted already. Except for this one girl. One girl that is dressed in a cropped wool sweater (which is absolutely inappropriate compared to all the nakedness in this club) and also looks like the only one of them who is not having fun at all. He laughs again. He must be mistaken, but isn’t that the Taylor Swift? „Mate..“ he tabs Burns on the shoulder, who just looks at him confused. „The blonde one with the winter attire.. isn’t that..“ „Yup. I think so. Why?“ he asks. Adam grins. Burns rolls his eyes and pats his back. „I’d go up and talk to her now If you wanna fuck her because she does not look like she has a lot of fun.“ Burns says and Adam just shakes his head. He looks at the table again. He can see the situation escalating a little. One of the really drunk girls managed to poor her cranberry drink over her expensive white dress. She laughs loudly while Taylor seems to help her get up. She says something to the security people at the table and drags her friend to the restrooms and passes Adam’s table. He just finishes his drink quickly and removes himself slowly from the group of people whose conversations he wasn’t following anyway. Adam slowly makes his way to the restrooms as well. They both have seemed to find a few minutes of minor traffic in the restroom area. There are almost no people waiting in front of the restrooms. Adam walks past the ladies room and remains in front of one of the mirrors in the male area of the washing rooms. He washes his hands, didn’t even come here to finish some business. He wanted to get a chance to talk to this girl. This girl, so successful and famous that could possibly buy the entire venue herself, yet seems to be the only one not enjoying herself in this luxurious Vegas Club. Adam stops the water. He takes a peak into the room on the opposite of where he is, but he can see nothing. He then, slowly, makes his way outside and rests his back on one of the walls where usually people are standing in line to go to the bathroom. He has no idea wether he is drunk as fuck or if this girl in the blue wool sweater absolutely fascinates him. All he knows is that he freezes as soon as she steps outside. Alone. Her head still in the direction of the ladies room, her arms crossed. She sighs, doesn’t even notice him at first. There’s no smile, no happy facial expression. She’s clearly not having fun tonight. „I’m waiting outside.“ she tells her friend, receives a drunk and loud „Whaaaat?“ Adam can’t help but laugh a little. She seems annoyed, yells back again „I said I’m waiting outside, Cara.“ she repeats and leans back against the wall, just like Adam, only a few more inches away from him. The DJ can’t help but observe her with a grin. She obviously looks incredibly attractive yet she looks nothing like her friends or most of the girls in this club. She’s wearing leather boots and black tights under her high waisted skirt. Her blonde short hair is wavy and there’s no spectacular make up also. She’s almost showing no skin with her rather unsexy outfit, has a tired and annoyed look on her face. He tries not to be too obvious but she notices him. She looks a bit confused. „Are you waiting for something?“ she asks. Adam swallows. He realizes that there is no line for the bathrooms, which makes it a little harder at first to find a good excuse for why he is randomly standing almost in front of her. Adam clears his throat, then looks at her again. „I’m.. uh.. waiting for a friend.“ he lies. Taylor nods. „Me, too.“ She says annoyed. Adam smiles. He doesn’t know wether she’s tired or doesn’t recognize him at all. He usually gets the ‚Aren’t-you-the-DJ‘- encounter but this time, there’s nothing. Just a tall and annoyed girl, standing in front of him. „So.. are you here often?“ He asks, hopes to develop a conversation that makes her realize that he, as well, is working in music which could possibly lead to a follow up conversation. Taylor, who still has her arms crossed looks at him. The bass of the music is loud, she seems to not have understood him. „What?“ „I asked, If you’re here often..“ He repeats. She looks at this tall and random guy and starts laughing. He joins her, yet unsure of what was so funny about the question. „Are you actually serious? Or are you hitting on me?“ She asks. He can’t help but smirk at her smart answer and opens his mouth again. Her friend as well as his imaginary friend are still nowhere to be seen. „Maybe yes to both of your questions..“ he says boldly. She’s still smiling, not as bright as before, but in a rather ironic way. „Well, you wanna know my answer to that?“ she asks, the drunk friend returning back to Taylor. Cara looks at Adam and winks at him awkwardly. He laughs a little. She seems really wasted. „I’d love to.“ He says, hopes that the conversation won’t end now already. Taylor grabs Cara to stop her from running around and making even a bigger mess than already. She looks at the tall guy in front of her. „Well I’m wearing a knitted sweater with a cat embroidered on my back. So… no, clubs like this are not on my usual friday night schedule.“ she answers, starts to walk away with her drunk friend who again, winks awkwardly at Adam. „And what was your answer to me hitting on you?“ He asks again boldly, a smirk on his face. She starts walking away while guiding her friend safely. She turns around and laughs while rolling her eyes. „You wouldn’t wanna do that to yourself. Trust me.“ She smiles softly and walks away. Adam remains there. All he can see is the embroidered cat on the back of her sweater. He can’t help but laugh a little. He must admit that this was the most awkward encounter he ever had with a girl at Omnia. Yet he can’t help but wish it would’ve lasted longer than just the short period of her waiting for her drunk friend. She seems different than most girls here and different from what he expected from meeting the famous Taylor Swift. Adam smiles and walks back. She and her friends are gone. The table is empty. He smiles softly. Somehow, she has buried herself inside his head already.
12/17/35
„Lily, I swear I’m gonna freak out. Tell Daddy to drop you off now. You need to help me find it. I’m stuck up here since an hour already and the food will be delivered soon.” Taylor says into her phone, hears her sixteen year old daughter sigh. It’s always the same with her. Lily has phases when she starts cleaning up her entire room, packs up boxes of clothes and things to give away and then ends up throwing away things that she’s looking for a week later. Taylor hates to bother her with this on her birthday, but she has been looking for her daughter’s favorite CD since an hour already. Unsuccessfully. „We’re almost there, mom. I’m coming upstairs.“ she says and both hang up the phone. Taylor sits there, buries her head in her hands. The entire attic is filled with opened boxes that Taylor was going through. Yet she couldn’t find the CD. „Mom, I’m so sorry.. it must be here somewhere..“ Taylor hears her daughter running upstairs. She looks at the tall girl with the long dark blonde hair and smiles. She’s wearing her beloved ‚Shania Twain‘ retro- sweater, doesn’t even bother to dress up nicely for her birthday. „Daddy says Hi.“ She says while starting to go through some boxes. „Thanks, honey. Is he coming to dinner later?“ Taylor asks while slowly getting up from the chair she has been sitting on since hours while going through the boxes. „He says that he has some work to do but he’ll try to make it. We ate two dozen muffins already anyway.“ She says. Taylor smiles. „Baby, you know your Dad. Kick his ass and tell him to come later. I’ll go down and start preparing everything, okay?“ She says, stroking her daughters long hair with a smile. She can’t believe her baby girl is growing up so fast. She’s not a little girl anymore, simply looks like a stunning tall young woman already. Lily smiles and turns around, receiving a kiss on the cheek from her mom. „Thumbs are crossed you’ll find your Jack Johnson CD, birthday kiddo.“ Taylor says and leaves the garret smiling. Lily, who’s desperately going through all of the boxes she has prepared to give away is already on the edge of getting desperate. She would’ve never thrown away her favorite CD of all time. She gets up to try and look through some of the other boxes at the end of the attic. The girl grabs one of the boxes from above, unsure wether this one was hers or not. She places the box on the floor in front of her and opens it up. She smiles a little confused about the picture that’s laying on top of the stuff in the box. It’s an old photograph of herself and her mom right after she gave birth to her. Exactly sixteen years ago, today. She can’t really believe that she has ever been so small. Then she looks at her mom. She smiles the most beautiful smile in the world while holding her in her arms. Whenever she sees pictures like these, she realizes what everyone is always saying. Her mom was the most beautiful woman in the world. She still is. Lily puts the photo back into the box as she finds another photo. She swallows. She can’t remember to have ever seen this photo. She smiles embarrassed. This picture looks like an old party picture from before she was born. Her dad is wearing huge glasses while her mom is acting like cutting his throat with a knife. Lily laughs. It’s funny to see her parents being that young and silly. Then there’s all sorts of other stuff in that box. A heart necklace and some candles. She wonders if her mom doesn’t want the jewelry anymore. There’s also some paper. She picks it up and starts to read it. It’s more than obvious that this sheet seems to be some piece of her mom’s song writing. She knows this one particular song that her parents have written together, years ago. Yet it’s not the entire song on the hand written note, only a few lyrics from it. Lightning strikes every time she moves. Just when she was about to put the box back again, there’s another photograph that’s falling right into her hands. Lily looks at it for a long time. She feels some sort of sadness coming over her. She is used to her parents being separated, especially because she can’t even remember what it was like before they got divorced. She was still too small to recognize what it was like when her parents were.. in love. She looks at the picture, tries to remember anything. But she can’t. All she can see is a picture of her mom on the beach. She looks beautiful and young. Her dad’s arms are around her neck and he kisses her temple with closed eyes. They both look incredibly happy. It’s only then, when Lily realizes that something is written on the back of the photo. You have successfully buried yourself inside my head. Just when Lily was about to return the photo to the box, she can hear her mom entering the garret again. „Whatcha doin’ Miss Lily..“ She asks as she suddenly sees what her daughter is holding in her hands. Taylor hesitates for a second, then sits down next to her and smiles at the photo. She looks at Lily, who looks a little embarrassed. But Taylor smiles at her. It’s okay. „I used to love this photo.“ Taylor says smiling and looks at it as well. She remembers when they took this photo. It was right when they started dating for the first time. She was so in love back then. Crazy, unconditionally, unbearably in love. „What does this mean?“ Lily asks and turns the photo around. Taylor smiles. „That’s what your dad texted me the day after he first met me.“ She says. Lily smiles. „Really? That’s so cute.“ Taylor smiles. „Yeah I know.“ she says and Lily can’t stop staring at this picture. „Do you regret it sometimes?“ she asks her mother, who has wrapped an arm around Lily’s shoulder. „What?“ Taylor asks while looking at her daughter. „Marrying Dad, back then.“ Taylor looks at Lily confused. „Why would I ever regret that?“ she asks again. „Because… it didn’t work out and..“ „Oh baby..“ Taylor smiles and kisses her daughters hair. She’s happy that they both get a chance to talk about this. „I don’t regret it for a split second, honey. Without him, there are so many things that I wouldn’t have today. And the best thing of all is you.“ She says and kisses her girl again. Lily smiles, still looks at the picture of her Dad kissing her mom’s temple. „When I marry someone someday, I.. I want them to be the love of my life. Aren’t you said sometimes, that..“ „Your dad will always be the love of my life, Lily. I just.. I just think that in life, you can have more than one big and great love. And even though things don’t always work out the way we want that doesn’t change the fact that we still loved them, so much.“ She says carefully, cuddles her daughter close to her. “And that will never change.” Lily is the definition of a ‚Daddy’s girl‘. Since she was a baby, she had this incredible connection to Adam. And Adam to Lily. That’s something she never wants to miss. Something that she is grateful for. Lily cuddles her head onto her moms chest and Taylor strokes over her daughters blonde hair. Maybe her girl turned sixteen today, but she’ll always be her baby. No matter at what age. „Mom?“ „Mhm?“ „Can you tell me the story again? When you and daddy met for the first time?“ She asks. Taylor smiles, sinks her head to press a soft kiss onto Lily’s head and starts talking. „Okay, so. It was in February in Las Vegas. I was at a Club where your Dad was performing very often. And I was so annoyed because my friends coaxed me into going with them and I was wearing this totally ugly sweater that had a cat on the back. And it was hot and steamy and everybody was having so much fun but I hated it cause I never really liked those clubs. And then when I was waiting at the bathroom, there was this weird and tall guy standing and he was looking at me with a smirk………“
Hey guys! Here you have the 10th part of That Album! I hope you like it. I’ve been through some really tough things lately and I don’t know, wishing for a love like theirs and seeing that you guys are liking what I write make me so happy, so thank you for being so nice. I hope you like this part!
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It broke my heart to hear Taylor say all of that out loud. No matter if she would be my children’s mother or someone else it was a thing I was sure of, she would be one of the best moms on this planet. “Don’t say that. You will be a mom someday, a great mom because you’re like made for being a mother. So now isn’t just your time, but it will come, trust me.” I told her, still holding her hand in mine. And I could see a beautiful smile on those soft lips.
“Well thank you for being so nice. How about you, how are you?” she asked and I turned my eyes down. Could I tell her that I miss her? “Well I guess I kind of have the same feeling as you. I’m tired of watching the same life go on and on again. I’m 33, 34 in a half year and I’m not getting any younger. I don’t know what I wanna do with my life right now. But I do know that I wanna do more than just be sitting in my studio day in and day out.”
That was what I wanted to hear for our whole relationship. That he was ready, that he wanted more. Now it felt like we both wanted the same things, but we weren’t together anymore, and we couldn’t just go back to being that dreamy couple that we once had been, or could we?
“Well, you still have time to do whatever you want. And what happened with that pizza?” I said, to change the subject a bit for now, because in a way it made me happy, but in another way it also made me sad. Because if I had stayed with him we could have had everything. Now I didn’t, because I didn’t think he would change, but apparently, he has. And what if he is ready now, to go out and meet someone, and that someone was ready to give him all he wanted. Then I would be alone, maybe forever.
“If you eat pizza now, do you think you still have room in your stomach for dinner?” he asked. “Yeah, why?” I asked and blushed a bit, liking the way this all was headed. Maybe he would ask me out, maybe I could be the girl who made his dreams come true after all.
“Why don’t you just come over to me tonight and we can talk, play games, and I don’t know, I cook you something nicer than pizza.” he said. He then paused and looked deeply in my eyes. “No strings attached, you can go whenever you feel like it”. I could tell he was a bit nervous. And that was probably a good thing, because that could mean he still have some feelings left for me too.
“Well that sounds great, I’ll be there, if you call for the pizza now” I said and he started giggling and said “In a bizzle, Swizzle” and took up his phone. “What do you want on your pizza?” he asked. “A mozzarella pizza with pepperonis, or that will say if I actually get to keep them on my pizza this time” I said and we both giggled. “Well I can’t promise anything, but I’m gonna try my best to let them stay there” he said and made the call.
A few hours later
“Well, thank you for the coffee and the pizza” I said. We were just about to say goodbye, for now. “Your welcome” he said. This felt like that last moment on a first date. Should he kiss me? Should he hug me? Should he just walk away? “Well I see you tonight” he said and kissed me on my cheek and after that gave me a hug. “I look forward to it. You know, you never were much for cooking.” I said. “Things can change, Tay, things can change” he answered. We stood there for some moments longer. I have no idea if it were seconds or minutes, but if felt like that hug would last forever. And I hadn’t felt so safe for over a year. I loved that feeling. Having his arms around me. Feeling like he protects me if something bad happens.
Then he stepped back and ended the hug. “Well..” he said. “Well..” I answered. “See you soon” he said and started walking away from me. But kept looking back when he walked away, like he wanted to see if I still had my eyes on him, like he wanted to tell me that he only walked away for now and that this wasn’t our last time together.
I walked to Ellie’s dressing room. She sat there together with Emil and had her hair and makeup done. “Well, I see you later” Emil said when he saw that I came in, and then hugged Ellie goodbye. “Taylor” he said when he walked next to me.
“ELLIE” I said. She smirked. “Your welcome” she answered and looked very proud. “You don’t even know what happened.” I said. “Well, tell me” she answered. “We’re going on a date” I said and I could see the happiness in her eyes. “When? Where? What will you wear? Did he ask you out or did you ask him?”
“Calm down. I will tell you everything! I’m not sure it’s a date, date. But he kissed me, well only on the cheek, but still he kissed me. And he’s not together with Aarika, they are just friends. So we’re meeting at his place tonight and I have no idea of what I should be wearing. It’s Adam, if he likes me he will like me in whatever” I told her.
She had an “awwww” look on her face. “Once again, your welcome. And still, I’m happy to be the first borns Godmother.”
I smirked at her. “So you knew?” I asked. “If you’re talking about Adam and Aarika not being together, then that’s a yes. And if you’re meaning the fact that Adam still aren’t over you, well that’s a yes. But that you too would be kissing, dating, sleeping together and all off that on the first day, well that I had no idea about. I thought your pride might be a problem, miss I hold onto this pride because these days it’s all I have.”
I blushed when Ellie said all about that but that you too would be kissing, dating, sleeping together and all off that on the first day, part. “I guess pride isn’t everything, but it’s not like we will be sleeping with each other tonight” I told her. “Well, we just have to see about that” she told me. And I started picturing the whole scenario in my head. What if we actually would go that far tonight. His lips meeting my cheek and his arms being around me made me craving him, but I hadn’t thought about staying the night or making love. And it wasn’t before she mentioned it I realised how much I missed it, how much I wanted it. But I also knew, that it probably was too early. One thing I decided in that moment was to let go and not trying to control the whole situation, but just go with whatever happens.
A few minutes back….
I wanted nothing more than to kiss her, but I wasn’t sure she would be okay with it. I wanted her so much, but it was important that she was on the same page. Because I never wanted her to feel uncomfortable. I stepped closer to her, kissed her on the cheek and then sweeped her in my arms, not daring to look at her face. We talked a bit and then just stood there for the longest time. It felt like home, I didn’t want to step back, but after awhile I felt like I had to. So when I finally did and after we had said goodbye for real and I started walking away from her I kept looking back at that beautiful woman. And I got happy every time I turned my face around, because every single time I found her eyes on mine.
I got a text from Emil when I got out to my car, saying “Wait for me, I need a drive”. Right, I gave him a drive here, just so we would be in perfect time for me and Taylor to meet. They did this. And I don’t know, should I be mad or should I thank them? Maybe both? Meeting her only made me realise how much I miss her and how much I love her. Maybe it will give us another chance, but it could also leave me there alone and desperate.
“So you and Tay are back together, huh?” Emil asked when he opened up the door. “Haha really funny.” I answered. Then I put in the key and starting the car. I didn’t look at him, because I had the silliest smile on my face and I knew he would tease me about it.
After a few minutes of driving he said “You can’t tell me nothing, especially not when you’re have that silly smile on your face.”
“Well she’s coming over tonight” I told him. “Adam! Taylor is sensitive, don’t just take her home to sleep with her”
I looked away from the row to give him a “are you crazy” look. “You know I want her, not just the sex, I have to tell you, that was really good, but I don’t just want her for that. I want her because I think she’s the one” I said and could see his “I would like to judge you, but dude I’m just really happy” look.
After I had given Emil a drive home and thanked him for making all of this for me I drove to a supermarket, to buy some stuff for the very special evening. I bought some candles, some flowers, some ingredients for the dinner I would make and also some ingredients for a cake. She was the one who could cook and bake, but I had practiced a lot and hopefully I could make something to win her heart over, again.
Some hours later
5 minutes. In 5 minutes she would be standing on my doorstep. I had the food ready, the cake was done, the house was all cleaned and I had packed up my bag. I fixed the lightning, I wanted it to be a bit dark, just because that looked way more romantic and Taylor is hopeless romantic. I also lit a candle on the table. Maybe it’s too much, I thought to myself. But if it was anything I was sure of, then it was that she was worth everything on this planet. Maybe she didn’t want a romantic dinner, but she sure as hell did deserve it, so why not?
I looked at the clock. It was 8pm, the time we had said. The doorbell would ring in any second. In less than a minute I would see her, the love of my life, standing on my doorstep, probably in a beautiful dress that would hug her body nicely.
8.05, I was starting to get worried. Taylor Alison Swift was never late, NEVER.
8.13, had something happened to her? Had she gotten into an accident or something? Should I call her? Should I text her? Or had she simply realised that I wasn’t the one and that she couldn’t start over with me again? That I wasn’t good enough for her?
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What will happen next? Will she show up? Have something happened or is she starting to be doubtful over it all? Over them? What do you think?
(How is it possible for me to get so much inspiration after just a simple 4 minutes long song?)
A great many years down the road…..
MAISIE POV
“I’ve got it mom! Trust me, please.” I told my mom as she tried to interfere with my packing for the hundredth time.
“I know, I know…. It’s just….” Mom said, standing in the doorway of my bedroom leaning on the doorframe.
“I know mom, it’s hard for you to see me so grown up and all that stuff.” I said, rolling my eyes slightly, “But it’s not like I’ll be gone forever. It’s only until winter break. And you and dad have snazzy jets so I know you won’t go two-week without visiting or getting me home.”
“Well…. We’ll miss you that’s all.” Mom said, her voice wavering slightly as I turned to look at her. She looked smaller as she stood there looking at me.
Here you have part 8. I hope you like it!
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July 15th
I wrote down:
Getting Adam to admit that he has feelings for Taylor - check
Getting Taylor to admit that she has feelings for Adam - check
Getting Taylor to the show - check
Getting Adam to the show
After writing “getting Adam to the show”, I knew I had to figure something out. He was one of the biggest stars that would play on the festival in Japan. He needed to be there, but he also needed to be in the UK. To realise that their love is more important than his stupid pride.
Just when I sat there in my bed trying to make some plans, I got a text from Adam saying “I’m sorry for not being able to come to your show, but how about you come over to my house next friday? Me and some friends are planning to have a barbeque. So are you up for it?”
It would be perfect! That would be the perfect time to make everything work out.
I texted him back saying “Sounds great! I’ll be there, just text me a time and what I should bring.”
July 21st
I was grabbing my things, ready to head over to Adam’s. Everything was planned, now I just had to make it possible, and I knew that was the hardest part. But I would fight to make it happen. Because that day when Adam stands at the altar and Taylor walks out in a beautiful white dress, the look on Adam’s face, I just know that will be one of the most beautiful things I’ll ever see.
“Hi” Adam said when he opened up the door and immediately swept his arms around me. “Hey you” I said. Smiling, because I knew we probably looked like two idiots when we hugged each other, knowing he’s over 30 centimeters taller than me.
We walked inside and I started saying hi to some of his friends. I was the only girl there, but I was okay with it. I usually was, or that will say all the times except from when I’m with Tay and her huge girl power gang. I liked being with boys, but I was also really thankful for Taylor and the fact that she makes me hang out with some, because sometimes girls nights and girl talk is funny, and also important.
No Aarika, thank God I thought to myself. But just moments after I had that thought Charlie had to open his mouth and say “You won’t be alone all night long, Aarika will be here soon, so don’t worry.” Thank you for the information, but that was exactly what I was worried about, but of course I couldn’t tell him that.
“Okay, I don’t mind being the only girl though” was all I answered.
A few minutes later Aarika showed up in a black short dress that showed, in my opinion, too much boobs. She hugged Adam for the longest time and then whispered something in his ear that made him giggle. This couldn’t be happening, I thought to myself, also knowing that I couldn’t do anything to make them stop.
“That’s just so fake. I mean, we all know he’s still in love with Taylor” I heard someone say and immediately turned around. I faced Emil, one of Adam’s best friends. “So you know about it too?” I asked. “It’s so obvious. Like, when did he become so happy after a simple little text? Of course he loves her. I just wish I knew if she loved him too” I heard him answer. I was surprised. Emil was usually one of the funny guys and not at all this serious.
“Well if I tell you something private, can you help me with a thing then?” I asked. “Sure, what is it?”
This was my chance. “Taylor still have feelings for him too. Joe’s just a friend, she told me. So I planned on getting them together on my show, August 19th. Then I realized that Adam have a show in Japan. But if you get him there, pretend that you’re going to Japan, but you’re really going to the UK. And I get her there, then we can make it work somehow.”
“It sounds good, but what will I tell him when we land in the UK?” he asked. I had no idea, but we almost had a month to figure something out, so that’s what I told him.
“And Aarika can’t come, okay?” I asked, to make sure he fixed it. “Sure, but neither can Joe” he answered. We shook hands and stood there with weird smiles on our faces, because now we could actually make this work.
August 18th
“We’re on our way and he has no clue” I got a text from Emil saying. I smiled and looked over at Taylor who sat just a meter away from me, drinking some coffee.
“What is it?” she asked me. It was like she knew something would happen. “What are you talking about?” I asked.
“You seem really happy. Why? What did he send you?” She said and grined. “Who?” I ask, not understanding what she was talking about.
“Caspar, dah? Or was it something from someone else?” she asked, very interested of what was going on in my love life. And that was the perfect excuse, to say that it was something from Caspar, so that’s what I had to do.
“Sorry, I just…well he really is something special.” I said, to make it more natural and hoping she would buy it.
“Omg you too are so cute, even when you’re mysterious and dirty or whatever you two are doing. I wish I had a love like yours” She said. If you only knew how much I was working for that Taylor, I thought to myself.
“So I’m gonna go and rehearse, but we can meet in a few hours if you’d like?” I said. Wanting some hours to rehearse, but also a bit time to figure out where Emil and I could get Adam and Taylor to speak with each other.
“That’s great. Just text me when you’re done and I can meet you here or back at your house or mine, whatever you’d like.” Taylor said and we hugged each other goodbye.
*After Ellie’s rehearsal*
Just a bit from the cafeteria would be the perfect place. I could be sitting there, telling Taylor to come and I have to make sure Adam and Emil are on their way too at that exact time and then when they see each other they will be lost, confused, in love or whatever, it will take them around 10-40 seconds to come back to reality. And on that time Emil have to go away, come to me. It was a hard challenge, but we had to make it work.
After I figured it all out, and checked where Adam and Emil could go in and where Taylor would come from I texted Taylor “I’m done. You can come over to my house and we can just spend some time together, if you’d like?”
We had this trip together, but we both had places in London, which is really close to Chelmsford, so we didn’t take in at a hotel. Hotels are usually great in the UK, often better than the hotels in the states, but home is always home.
She texted me back saying “Text when you’re home and I’ll be right over”. That was great, then I had time to take a shower first and tell Caspar that I probably had figured it all out. Because he had listened to all off it and laughed pretty much at how much I wanted them to get back together, but still thinking that it is sweet that I care about my friends, and that I want the people in my life to be as happy as I am.
The shower took a bit longer than expected, because Caspar decided to come in and look after something, which lead to him joining the shower and the two of us making some love. After that I wanted nothing more than staying in bed with him, the whole night long. But we could do that whenever, now I had to make sure my friends got some laid too, I thought and giggled a bit as I put some clothes on and brushed through my hair.
I texted Taylor to come over and five minutes later she was at my house. When I opened up the door she looked at me with a smirk on her face. “That took long time, huh.” My cheeks turned into the lightest shade of red. “Yeah, sorry about that” I said and we walked in.
“Hey Taylor. How are you?” Capar asked as we walked into the same room as he was in, the kitchen. They hugged each other and I just stood there, in love with the relationship my boyfriend had to my dear friend. “I’m fine, and you too?” she asked back.
“Yes, everything is amazing, good, just wonderful” he answered. Taylor looked at me with a smirk that totally said something like “You totally dissed me for having sex”. I smiled. Loving the fact that we could communicate by just a look. If that wasn’t true friendship, then what was?
“So aren’t you going out tonight sweetie?” I asked and walked to the chair Caspar sat in and put my arms around him. “So now you want me to go?” he asked. “Well, it’s a girls night. And for what I know, you aren’t a girl” I said and he smiled. Then stood up and kissed me. “You two, have fun” he said and started walking out of the room, when Taylor opened her mouth to say “You can stay, it’s okay”.
“Thank you, Taylor! But I’m gonna meet some friends anyway, so have a great night.” then he looked at me and said “Love you babe”.
Around a minute later we could hear the door close. And Taylor directly turned to me and said “okay I never imagined myself saying this, but wow. I really miss having sex.”
I started laughing. “Well maybe you have to do something about that then” I said. To give her some hope, but also to find out if something had happened the last month, that could destroy my plan.
“Maybe, but how can I find someone like Adam? I mean, with us….” she started and I cut her off with “Yeah, I’ve heard you two, you don’t have to explain.” She immediately turned red.
“What?” she answered. Totally in shock from what I just had said.
“Well, 4th of July. You two were up all night long, and I’m pretty sure almost everyone heard the two of you.” I said. “No, no, no. Do you mean my parents. Oh my God no” she answered and looked like she had done something really wrong. “So what? It’s not like your parents never had sex.” I said and laughed a bit. Knowing I had to say something else, to make her feel better and forget about that night for now.
“There is a lot of guys that are big down there you know, it’s not like Adam is the only one” I said. She started to grin. “How do you know?” she asked. I understood that she wanted to know how I knew that Adam was big, but I had to joke a bit so I answered “Because Casper isn’t my only one, and just for the information, he isn’t small either.”
We both laughed. “You know that wasn’t what I meant” Taylor said. “Well, we recorded I Need Your Love together and I didn’t just have to kiss him, or what ever we should call it. I also had to have a naked Adam jumping on me, well we had the blanked between us and it wasn’t sexual at all, but he was naked, and stuff like that, so yeah I know.”
Seeing them both really happy, really in love. And then talking about sex and Adam. I had never even thought about the fact that they had seen each other naked. And I know I could really mind it, but I didn’t. They did that music video a long time ago. And Ellie was in love with Caspar now. And she had right, maybe I should just go out and have some fun, like all the other girls in my age have done or are doing.
“But you know what, I don’t think you could sleep with someone when you still have feelings for Adam. So maybe you have to figure out that first.” She told me and I knew she was right. I wasn’t that type of girl who just had sex with someone because of my needs. And I was definitely not that kind of girl who had sex with someone when I had feelings for another man. I had to decide soon. Should I try to talk with him, or should I forget him?
Some of our friends came over and we had an awesome evening. I was so happy I decided to do this. To stop thinking about the last song on my album and just go out and have some fun. We really danced the night away and when the clock was around midnight I decided to go home. I knew Ellie needed some rest before her show tomorrow. So when I left, the others did too.
August 19th
I woke up around nine o'clock. I stayed in bed for around half an hour. Looking at some videos on youtube and open up my Instagram. I typed in Ca and there his artist name was, right in front of me. I clicked on his profile and looked at his latest pictures. He had changed. He had grown a mustache that looked terrible and his beard didn’t look as good as before. Maybe he just didn’t care anymore. When we were together he cared a lot about how he looked like. So maybe that meant he didn’t love her. Or maybe it just meant that he felt more comfortable with her. Who knew? I told myself it was the first thing, because I still couldn’t stand the thought of him being with someone else.
“Excited for today?” I texted Ellie when I finally stepped out of bed. “Yeah, I’m actually really excited, and so glad that you’ll be there” she answered.
We had decided to meet up behind the Weston Park, 10 pm. We would hang out there, she would have a rehearsal that I would listen to, then we would meet up for coffee backstage. After that we she would get her hair and makeup done and try on her clothes. Then we would hang out awhile before she went out on stage.
We met up 9.55 and walked to her rehearsal. She seemed a bit nervous. I didn’t understand why. “So here’s the cafeteria, we meet up here a bit after my rehearsal.” she told me and pointed at the place where they had some chairs, couches and served some coffee. “Okay, and Ellie it will go fine, I promise” I said, trying to calm her down. She smiled and answered “Well I hope so”.
Some hours earlier….
Great thing number one: Flying to England and Tokyo takes the exact same time from California.
Great thing number two: He was on good mood today.
Bad thing number one: I know he will be so angry when he finds out we have landed in England instead of Tokyo. I had talked with the pilot. He loved Adam and Taylor together, so it wasn’t hard to convince him.
I had also talked with the people who was in the lead of Summer Sonic Festival, so they knew he wouldn’t come. They hadn’t written about it or anything like that, to make sure Adam wouldn’t find out. Some fans would be really upset, but whatever. The true fans cared about his happiness and this could make him the happiest man on earth, if everything went as planned.
“This isn’t….” Adam said as he looked out of the windows when his pilot said we would land in a few minutes. “Surprise” I said, really worried.
“What the f*ck Emil? Why are we in England?” He almost scream to me. “Well, I wish I could tell you, but I can’t.” I answered. I could see how he turned red of anger. I knew it was stupid, I knew this would happen, but I also knew he would forgive me.
When we had landed the pilot came out and said “Mr Wiles, we had to land here. You’re having your show in Japan later, don’t you worry”. I smiled at him, but I could tell he looked a bit scared. Adam was his boss, he could fire him in any damn minute.
“Why? Why are we here?” Adam asked again. “You have a show here instead” I said. “They wanted you on the V Festival, tomorrow. And they pay you so much more than the other festival did, and you got another show in Japan, so I fixed it all and you win on it” I said, knowing I have to fix another show for him in Japan soon.
“Why didn’t you tell me that before?” he asked. “Because I wanted it to be a surprise” I told him and smiled. He still looked a bit pissed off, but maybe it would be better after some hours sleep. The time difference was always a problem, but if we went to sleep right away it would hopefully be fine. The clock was 3am in England, and when we got to Adam’s house it was around 4. “So I’m going to my house now, but you better get excited because you are the big surprise, don’t forget about that.” I told him. “Sure, goodnight” he said and I left his house. Then I sent Ellie a text, telling her that everything had worked out as planned.
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So what do you think? Will everything go as planed? Will Taylor and Adam get back together? You just have to wait a bit longer to find out!
A/N: sorry for the delay… a lot going on right now. Send requests or feedback or whatever. please be nice :)
TIME HOP TO CHRISTMAS
TAYLOR POV
The alarm went off, waking Adam and I up from our semi-decent sleep, and I quickly turned it off, in order to try and prevent the noise from waking the sleeping child in our room.
“Merry Christmas love.” Adam said sleepily, rolling towards me and smiling.
“Merry Christmas…. I think we have 5 minutes until our little monster bursts in and all hell breaks loose.” I replied, smirking at him slightly.
We had been awake until 1am helping to wrap and place presents for this morning, and then woke up again at 3am by a cranky baby.
Hello! I said this is my favorite part, but I didn’t have time to finish it, so the next one will hopefully be the best one, because that’s the one I like the most (so far). But I hope y’all will like this one too.
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July 13th
Ellie was coming over today and I couldn’t stop thinking about her relationship to Adam. Maybe our relation would be destroyed or changed, just because loser Taylor still have feelings left for her ex, that ex who probably don’t care about me at all.
The day she introduced us, wow. I can still remember it like it was yesterday. We fell in love right away. From the moment my eyes met his I knew he was the one. And he felt the same. Almost like it was a fairytale. My fairytale only needed a happy ending now. I had worked with my new album for some time and I was really happy and proud over it. The only problem was that it didn’t have that happy ending. Something was missing, and I knew it probably was that romantic fantastic song I would write if I ever got back together with Adam. But I don’t know if I can wait that long. My fans are writing about TS6 everywhere, so I have to finish it pretty soon. They’re expecting an album this year, maybe in the end of next year, but getting him back could take me years. And who knew if it even was possible?
I got a text saying “I’m here” from Ellie so I went down stairs to the door and opened it just before she had time to ring the bell. I hugged her for almost a minute. I had missed her so much. “Hey, how are you?” I asked when we pulled back. “I’m really good, almost everything is going well right now” she told me. We walked in and then up the stairs. I showed her the room she could sleep in over the night. She left her things there and then we walked down to my living room.
I couldn’t help wondering what was wrong in her life. Her tour went great, now she had lots of festivals, her new music sounds amazing, she’s having a shoe collection, she’s more fit than I’ll ever be, she’s looking really pretty and she have Caspar. So what did she miss in her life?
“So I know you’re all healthy and stuff…so I baked us some bars, all natural and healthy. And then I bought a lot of fruit so we can make a fruit salad tonight. So do you wanna try my bars?” I asked. I had never baked this once before so I was really excited over it. “Yeah sure” she answered.
I walked to the kitchen, put some of them on a plate, made some tea and then walked back to her. “Netflix?” I asked her. “If we forget about the and chill part” she joked. I giggled. “Yeah, sorry girl, but my heart belongs to somebody else.”
A second after the words came out from my mouth I immediately regretted it. I sat down next to her on my couch, just waiting for the question. “Well, I’m happy if Joe makes you happy.” was all she said.
We put on a movie and I started feeling really bad. I didn’t tell her, it was almost like lying. And she was one of my best friends. And honesty is one of the most important things in life. I paused the movie, just in the ending. “Hey what are you doing?” Ellie asked. Obviously more focused on the movie then me. “I’m not together with Joe. He’s just a friend” I said and then paused to see her reaction.
“Okay…(?)” she almost asked. “I just wanted you to know.” I said. She seemed totally fine with it. I started the movie again, turned my eyes back to the screen and then on her. She had a smooth smile. “What is it?” I asked. Wondering why she was this happy. “Nothing” was all she answered, but kept smiling like that until the movie ended.
“It was a beautiful movie” I said, glad that I had seen it before, because of the fact that I couldn’t focus when we watched it. “Yeah, but a bit boring too. I mean I used to see love like that in real life. But I guess it’s more romantic on the movies, because they always take the other back and yeah you know” she said.
I saw that as a hint. She was talking about Adam and I, or wasn’t she? Maybe it was just one of a million of the other thoughts I was having about him every day. He’s always there in my mind. Adam would love this shirt, if Adam and I ever get back to together, at our wedding, our future kids, ahhh it was like I was obsessed with him. How could it possible stop? Could I even make it stop? Or would I think about him every day for the rest of my life?
“Did you know Adam wrote a song about me?” I asked, just to bring it up when we were talking about love. She looked at me a bit worried and answered “Yeah, what did you think?”
I looked down for a moment, I had to answer something smart, because I didn’t want to say I LOVE ADAM WILES, because I didn’t knew how she would take that, and I wasn’t even sure I was ready for her or other people to know. I mean Abi knew, and Joe too. Well, Austin and my parents had probably figured it out too, but otherwise no one knew.
I then looked up at her and said “Isn’t it weird that he was like hey I love you and adore you the first second and was flirting with his ex the other? I mean, maybe I really dodged a bullet.” She didn’t look too happy when I said it. “Well, he didn’t even answer my text, so I probably did” I added.
“Wait, what? You texted him? Why?” Elli almost screamed out. “I….I…” I knew I went too far. “I just wanted to know why he never told me, because maybe that would have saved our relationship.”
“You care about him…..So you still like him, huh?” Ellie asked. “No” I said and could feel my cheeks blush. Omg I was like a teenager all over again. “Taylor, you still have feelings for Adam. Why don’t you just go back to him? I loved you two together” she answered.
“Well, it doesn’t matter if I have feelings for him or not” I looked down at the ground, because I wanted to hide that my eyes started tearing up. “He’s in love with Aarika. I threw it away and now it’s gone forever. It probably just wasn’t meant to be” I said.
Ellie hugged me. “I’m sorry honey” she said. And a few tear fell down my cheeks. I felt too emotional, but on the other hand, who could blame me? He should have been a better man, but I should have been a better woman too. He didn’t cheat or anything like that, so it’s not just his fault our relationship ended. But if he only had told me, instead of pushing my love away. If he only had told me he loved me and wanted me to stay, I would have.
We made some dinner, sat down outside on my balcony and just talked for awhile, I played her some of my new songs, she played me a few of her newest songs and then we went to bed. Elena knew my secret about Adam, but she hadn’t told me he was single or anything like that, so I guess she knew that it was something serious between Adam and that girl. It broke my heart, but I was happy she was the one who told me, because she was the one who started it, now she had been the one who ended it.
July 14th, evening
“Thank you so much for letting me stay here and for two amazing days.” Ellie said. “Well you’re always welcome in my homes, you know that. And it was really nice to catch up. We have to see each other soon” I said when I hugged her goodbye.
We pulled back from each other and just when I’m about to say goodbye she answers “You know actually, I have some festivals now. And I would love if you came to at least one of them. And yeah you could hang backstage, so no one will see you and take pictures of you.”
I thought about it for a second. I had been so busy lately. I hadn’t been to one of Ellie’s shows in forever, so why not? “Sure! Just tell me a date.”
“I have one in Russia, one in Romania, one in Poland, well what do you say about coming to my show in the UK? It’s the easiest, I guess.”
UK would be so much easier than the others, I loved it there, they have cute boys, and a lot of my friends are living there so I could do lots of things if Ellie can’t hang out with me the whole time.
“Perfect, text me all the info and I’ll be there” I answered and we hugged each other goodbye one last time.
When I walked to my car from Taylor’s house I had millions of thoughts in my head. Adam had feelings for Taylor and Taylor had feelings for Adam. Now I just have to get Adam to my show in the UK too. And there, well they just have to get back together, somehow.
I took up my phone from my purse when I got to my car and clicked on message and then Adam :D. “When will you be in the United Kingdom the next time?”
I got an answer pretty quick “I don’t know, why do you ask?”
Because Adam freaking Wiles I’m trying to be a matchmaker, I wish I could have answered, but of course I couldn’t. So instead I answered “Can you come and watch me play August 19th? I miss the two of us hanging out backstage and just having lots of fun!”
“I have a festival, sorry. But we have to do that sometime.”
Seriously? He had a gig and that one gig would make him unhappy for the rest of his life. What could I do now? I basically told Taylor that Adam was with Aarika, just to make it a surprise and so they could hit it off much easier, but now….what if she decided to finally move on or something? What if he has too many gigs? I thought I had everything planed out, but apparently I hadn’t.
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Is it over? Are Tayvin over forever and always? Or will Ellie find away for them to get back together? You just have to wait until the next part to find out more! Have a lovely day or evening <3
do u have a link to the one where andrea walks in on them in taylors room at a party at her moms house
http://teylors.tumblr.com/post/139089229087/redefined-humiliation-tayvin
It was a beautiful summer morning, the sun teasingly entering the master bedroom through a slit in the curtains. Taylor stirred slightly, feeling a sturdy surface beneath her. Unsurprisingly, she found her fiance’s chest underneath her head and smiled. It had been an entire year since Janice’s kidnapping, and Taylor and Adam were stronger than ever. They needed to be, with a stubborn daughter like Janice in their care. Although Janice never fully recovered from learning about her father’s murder, she was happier with Adam and Taylor. They were their own, small family.
TAYLOR POV
I had told myself it was just nerves making me feel sick, just nerves. But then I felt the bile rising in my throat and I was a goner, tossing everything from the wastepaper bin and seeing the few bites of food I had eaten at dinner come out.
Maisie immediately shrieked and ran to get Adam, who quickly came running in. He immediately sat next to me and rubbed my back gently.
“You’re okay darling…. Better to get it out then make you sicker.” He said gently, making me cry even more. “You should’ve told me you were feeling rotten, we didn’t have to have that dinner.”
“I’m fine, trust me.” I say, trying to smile at him, but his concerned face made me whimper again.
Hey you! Here you have the next part of that album. I hope you like it! If you have missed the story, you can find the other parts here:
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I got the first text from Dillon, then another one from Emil. They all still had some contact with her, or at least more contact with her than me. I still had her on snapchat, but I didn’t dare to look at her photos. Because I knew she would see my name. She only had around 50 friends on there, or at least she only had that when she was mine. But everything was different then, so maybe this wasn’t the same either.
It was a picture on a breakfast. I could see that it was in her Rhode Island house, because of the furniture. Taylor wasn’t that “normal girl” that had what everyone else’s had or what was the most popular. She had what she liked, you could mostly see that in her Nashville kitchen, but all her houses have unique details that no one else has.
On the picture you could also see a hand. It was a male hand, because it was too big, thick and manly to be a girl hand. Some girls have manly hands, but the most of Taylor’s friends were supermodels or just really skinny anyway. So I was pretty sure it was a guy. And therefore also pretty sure it was Joe.
When I opened it the first time, the one from Dillon, I felt my heart break into a million little pieces. I thought she already had done that with my heart. I thought she had done that when she left me, met Tom, hang out with Tom, met Joe, and was seen with him. And this time, seeing that she makes it official with her friends, well she broke it once again. I guess this would keep happen everytime I see her with another guy.
But the second time I saw it, when I opened Emil’s message, I got angry. Because I realised he can’t make her as happy as I did. He can’t possible be a better man, or could he? I needed her! And that Joe guy, he could just go back to living with his parents instead of living with my girl. He shouldn’t be there, I should. He can’t just take her.
I had my 4th “party” or maybe we should call it meet up, because it wasn’t that many at my place. And Ed and I wasn’t up the whole night singing karaoke, like we did last year. It was just some friends and my family.
I had decided not to post anything on my instagram, tumblr, facebook or anything like that. I only took a few pictures to my snapchat, for my friends that couldn’t come, so they could see what was going on.
My dad and mom wanted to go back to Nashville the fifth and Austin had to fly back to California for some work. Joe would go back home to England for awhile and my other friends went back to their regular lives too. I wanted to record my new song that I had been written a few days earlier, so I decided to go back to Nashville and meet up with my guys there.
On the flight home with my parents they asked me a bunch of questions like; are you and Joe just friends, what are you doing about the rumors, have you heard something from Adam and so on. It was many other, more comfortable questions that came up also, but these questions, they were the hardest to answer, especially the last one. Because Joe and I, well we were just friends. And the rumors, I see them as annoying, but right now, pretty good. And Adam, what should I say? He wrote at least one song about me, telling me that he loves me, and then hanging out with another girl, just like I’m nothing.
Otherwise, the flight was pretty calm. We talked about my mother and her cancer. How she’s fighting and it gets better, but that it still hasn’t gone away. About my father, his work, his friends and everything else that goes on in his life, which was so much more than I thought. And then my brother Austin. He’s so grown up now, and I can still remember him as a kid. The cutest and funniest of them all. Well, I guess he still is today. I feel like he’s always the second child, just because I’m famous or whatever we should call it, but I love him and am so proud over his work. That he gets to do what he loves, well that makes me the proudest sister on this planet. Now we both only have one important thing left, finding true love. Or I knew I had found mine, but also that I had lost it, and probably had to fight really hard to have a chance to win him back.
I would meet with Ellie later today. To find out what she knew. She had been in Italy, but would now come to America for a few days, so I had made sure she got some time to meet me.
I was nervous. Because Ellie was the one who first introduced me to Taylor. She was the reason I changed my opinion. I had always wanted to meet Taylor, so maybe we would have hit it off anyway, sooner or later. But I was so sure she wasn’t my type, I mean come on, I swiped left on her when I played tinder. So maybe I wouldn’t have looked at her for that long to realise, that that girl has the most beautiful blue eyes on this planet.
The clock was 2pm when she came over to my place. “Hey you” she said and hugged me. “Hello Ellie” I said and hugged her back. “I haven’t seen you in so long, I had almost forgotten how tall you are” she said. I started giggle and joked back “Well, I had almost forgotten how short you are”.
We walked inside and when we got to the kitchen I offered her something to drink. She said she would love some tea, the typical thing with European or at least with British people. We loved our tea. “Sure thing” I said and started making some.
“How are things between you and Tay?” she asked me, out of nowhere. “Ehm…what do you mean?” I answered. Not really knowing what to say. “Oh come on Adam. You asked me about Joe. Are you gonna act like you don’t have any feelings for her? Because sure thing, your song told me a totally different story.” I looked down at the ground, not wanting to face her. Not wanting her to know the truth, because how lame wasn’t I. It had gone over a year and I still wasn’t over her.
“You know what? I don’t even think they are together. I mean come on, she would have posted something fun with him. Remember your 4th of july together? She was all over you, and you were all over her. And none of us dared to go anywhere near her bedroom that night, I mean, I never understood how you dared to do whatever you did to her, with her family in the house. I mean if you guys only had heard yourself.”
My face turned red when she reminded me of that night. I felt awkward, because I hadn’t even thought about how loud we were, when her parents actually were there. But they always liked me anyway, thank God.
“You don’t know that” I finally answered and looked up at Ellie.
“That they aren’t together or that you two were like animals that night. Because I’m pretty sure of the both of them. But I’m gonna be honest, I don’t know how Taylor feels about you. I mean, Better Man had some tough words in it.” she said and I could see that she felt a bit guilty for pushing me, when she didn’t knew how Taylor felt. She knew as good as I that Taylor is a strong women that doesn’t need a man by her side. And maybe she doesn’t want me or any other guy there by her side.
But Ellie was right about one thing. They didn’t post any pictures, and yeah sure it was her break and everything, but if they were together and she really loved him, she wouldn’t have cared.
We talked for awhile, she played me some of her new music and then she had to leave.
I had just left Adam’s house, and I was a bit in shock actually. Because Adam loved Taylor. I loved how they hit it off right away, after I had introduced them to each other. I loved how happy they made each other the first year and how good I felt, for bringing so much happiness into two people’s lives.
So I decided to do whatever it took for them to get back together. And the Adam part was pretty much done. He had basically admitted that he still have feelings for her. The only thing that was left with Adam was his pride. But I knew he would be able to give it another chance so much easier than Taylor would. But before I started working with her pride, I had to find out if she still have feelings for Adam. Ellie the matchmaker was back, I thought to myself and giggled. If they both still had feelings for each other that would just prove how silly they are. Because other people would give anything for a love like theirs.
I took up my phone and went to my contacts. Wrote in TayTay and then clicked on message. “Hey Tay, sorry for not being able to come to your party. But we should totally catch-up sometime. When do you have time over for meeting your old friend ;)? ”
Half an hour later I got a reply saying “It’s okay. Sure thing, how about some day next week?”.
“13th?” I asked, because that day I was totally free.
“Sounds great! Where do you wanna meet?” Taylor answered right away this time. She had so many houses so when I met her it was always so many options.
“Nashville?” I asked, knowing she didn’t want to be seen too much on her break.
“Okay, I’m fixing a bed for you.” She answered. Taylor was always so opened. I could take in on a hotel, but of course she thought I should stay at her place. I knew it was worthless to fight it so I only wrote “See you then” back to her.
Right after the texting conversation with her I started planning everything out.
Yes! I am back haha. I'll try to upload something this or next week ❤️❤️
Awesome!!! I can't wait Xx
@forevergoingwiththeflow is back?!??! YAYY
🎉🎉🎉
Hey guys! I told you it would be up today :) Okay I said tomorrow yesterday, and the clock is 11.45pm in Sweden. Maybe it’s the July 12th for some of you, but the time difference will always be a problem. Anyway, this one is longer and I really hope you like it!
If you haven’t read the story, you can find the other parts here:
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I woke up late that morning, because my party went on for a long time. I thought and hoped I would wake up to a text from the girl I missed more than anything in this world and I had. Or I had probably gotten the text at the party, just that I didn’t check my phone all the time, because I wanted to remember that evening.
“Never ever in my wildest dreams” I would have said if someone told me I would write this much lyrics to an album. But I had gotten my heart broken for real this time. The women I loved had walked away from me. At first I was mad, and that’s why I gave out My Way and why the whole twitter thing happened. Today, well let’s just say I miss her. And that’s why I gave out Faking It. Other songs and parts of songs on the album is also about her, us and our relationship, but Faking It is probably the song that mean the most to me, because I’m actually telling the world about my feelings and love for her.
I clicked up the text and read “Why didn’t you tell me?” That was all. No more, nothing less. I have to admit, I was a bit disappointed. But maybe this meant she still loved me and wished I would have told her.
“Mates, guess who texted me” I wrote to my closest group of friends. I layed there in bed and just smiled. Maybe, just maybe I had a chance. Wow, you sound like a little boy who just got laid, I thought to myself. But this was so much more. This could change my life!
“I would have said Taylor, but I don’t think she said she loves you when she just landed in Rhode Island with her new boyfriend. And yeah, sorry ‘bout that bro…”
WHAT? WITH HER NEW BOYFRIEND? I knew about the rumors, I was so jealous when I found out, but I guess I didn’t believed it. I guess I couldn’t believe that Taylor dated a guy like that. A guy that lived with his fu*king parents at the age of 26 or however old he was. He looked like a kid, but I knew Taylor liked boys like that, just look at her exes. I only thought she might had gone over to the more mature looking guys at this age, after Tom and I. Well, maybe it was for the best. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be, but I wanted her. I knew it sounded childish, but I wanted her all to myself. So I searched on the internet for “Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn Rhode Island” and it seemed like they had landed there together. Or at least they both were there.
I got mad, I wanted her. And I couldn’t lose her to someone like that. I had a hard time dealing with her fame, but how in the world could he handle it. He’s probably a nice person, but let’s face it, right now he’s a nobody. Wait, he’s a nobody, so he’s probably only using her, and she will go in 100% for that damn relationship, like she always does. But I just know he can’t handle it! He will break her heart and she will give up on true love, adopt a baby and just let it all go. She will love that child more than anything in the world, but she will be alone forever, and so will I.
A tear fell down from my face. I couldn’t think about Taylor and I not having babies. We had talked about that so many times. How our kids would be really tall and the cutest kids that ever walked on this planet. But maybe she would have kids with him, Joe. Or maybe she would adopt. She talked about having kids all the time when we were together and how she wanted a big family. She’s 30 in a few years, so she will probably feel more pressure now. Because she always told me she wanted to wait, just a little bit longer. I wish she had forgotten a pill or something like that, because then we would have gone in for saving our relationship more than we did. We both just gave up. But today, I can’t help wondering why.
I took up my phone to text Ellie and ask about Joe and the 4th. I wanted to do it, but in a way I didn’t. I was scared. Scared to find out that Taylor is with another guy and that it might be something serious between them. Also scared of Ellie annoying me over it, because I just know she wouldn’t shut up if I tell her.
“Hey! Are you going to Tay’s 4th of July party and do you know if Joe is going?” I wrote and then pressed send. I wanted to know, but I knew it would hurt me. I’m usually the strong man who doesn’t cry and sh*t like that, but after losing Taylor, I cried like a baby.
“Someone is jealous, huh? She’s just having a small thing this year, because pretty much everyone has plans. I don’t know if I’m going or not, but to the important question, yes, he is!”
I couldn’t believe it. Or I knew it was possible, that she actually moved on, don’t care about my songs, but the whole internet….wait, I have to check what they had to say about it! Because of the fact that it was really late and not morning at all when I woke up it was a lot of things said. People loved the album, which made me happy. And on tumblr, well let’s just say everyone understood Faking It was about her, so they understood that I still love her. I clicked on her profile and saw that she hadn’t posted or liked anything in a long time. And tumblr used to be her favorite place to spend time on, well I guess it wasn’t anymore. Maybe she didn’t care, but maybe it would actually hurt her to go on Tumblr again and maybe that’s the reason to why she stays away.
Anyway, I have to get her back. I have to do whatever it takes to get her back. Not just because of the great sex or that she’s really beautiful, but also because she inspired me, gave me hope, made me happy, was my best friend and really did make me a better person, a better man. But apparently I wasn’t good enough. But my whole world had fallen in pieces when she left me and I had to get my life back.
I got another text from Ellie, it said “But I don’t know if they are a thing or not. I can ask if you’re wondering….”
What could I possible answer? I went on social medias a bit longer and then I found something that broke my heart a bit. Me standing and talking with Aarika and looking at her boobs. WHY DID YOU LOOK AT HER BOOBS ADAM? WHY? I asked myself. People on the internet thought we were back together and some said that we probably were friends with benefits. Maybe this was my chance. If I make Taylor jealous, maybe she would feel like she have to fight for me. Well that’s a great idea.
“Okey thanks, but no I have Aarika now.” I texted back to Ellie. I wanted her to ask, but if Taylor actually was together with Joe, she would understand that I still love her and would probably just think it was sad, that I couldn’t get over her, so my plan have to work.
I decided to call Aarika and some of my boys, to ask if they wanted to come over and if Aarika and I were snapped in a picture together, or if she just were seen in my house, I knew Taylor would be jealous, or that will say if she still have feelings for me.
I took one plane and Joe another, but we met up on the airport in Rhode Island. I hugged him and said “Thanks for coming”. He smiled and then answered “well, the pleasure is mine”. We walked over to my driver. On the drive to my RI house we talked about everything between heaven and earth. Including Adam’s new album, and especially Faking It. Joe thought it was as clear as I, the song was about me.
I just needed to hear it from people, to don’t feel crazy. He said he loved me, but then stared at another girls boobs. Other people would probably just say “yeah, he’s a dj. That’s why!” But Adam was nothing like that when we were together, and that’s what make me so unsure about it all. I mean, I recorded some beautiful love songs about me and Adam and our relationship, I wrote the songs when we were together, so of course they are happy. Maybe this was just one of those songs. But would he really write it from a watching back perspective and answer some of the things from my songs I’ve given out about him?
When we got to my house I gave Joe a house tour and showed him his room. It was pretty close to mine, just in case he would get lost or something like that (It’s a big house 😂).
I gave him some time to pack up, and when he did that I decided to make us some tea and looked after the cookies I baked yesterday that I had in my suitcase. The best thing with having a lot of houses is probably that you don’t have to bring too much. Because I have clothes, games and my typical 4th of July things there already. So I only had to bring the most important things and of course something nice to eat on the flight and after landing, that will say, before I have time to cook or bake something.
Joe came down just when the tea was ready. So we walked outside and sat behind my house, not to make it too obvious and not showing too much. Maybe some fans would see us and take a picture, but we didn’t mind. It would just be wonderful for my plan.
After we had drinking the tea and when the cookies were in our stomachs instead of the plate we decided to watch a movie and then he decided to go to bed, he was really tired because of the time difference.
When I had some time over I went up to my bedroom, and took up my phone from the suitcase. I had a new text from Abi, also a new picture. I opened it up. It was a picture that one of Adam’s friends had posted on his private Snapchat of Adam, Aarika and two other guys playing billiard. He stood behind her, holding his arms around her body to show her how to do it “the right way”. He used to do that with me too. I was usually the one who won our games, but I liked it because I felt so close to him. Our friends always said something like “ohh you two, get a room” when he did it in front of people. Because it was just so much chemistry and maybe some sexual attention too. I missed that. But now she was the one who stood in front of him and not me. It made me sad, but at the same time angry. Why did he do this? He didn’t even look into the camera, so he probably didn’t even knew the picture was taken. He was probably just in love with her, but he can’t be. Because he should be in love with me!
ADAM POV
“Alright Maisie. It’s go time!” I said, smiling at her as she bounced around smiling widely, “I can heard mommy’s car coming up the driveway.”
“I am SO excited daddy!” Maisie said, squealing slightly as I chuckled.
We were standing by the front door, ready to welcome Taylor home and get the evening underway. It was not almost 7 PM, so it was getting darker outside and in my opinion the candles made the firepit look like a fairy land of some sort. We had also lined the path using outdoor fairy lights and flowers.
The door opened and Taylor walked through. I was smiling widely, wearing a nice shirt and slacks, with Maisie standing next to me in a daisy covered dress with her hair nicely brushed and in an aliceband. But as soon as I saw Taylor’s face my smile dropped. She was pale and looked stressed – not in a way where everyone would notice, but I know her every expression and she was definitely stressed.
Hey guys! Here you have part 3 of the story. Part 4 will be out tomorrow! I hope you like it <3
That album part 1: https://jackieswift.tumblr.com/post/162440799402/that-album
That album part 2: https://jackieswift.tumblr.com/post/162487913687/that-album-part-2
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Some hours later….
“How to win Adam’s heart over
Step one:
Make him believe I don’t care about him and that it’s impossible for him to get me back - why? - He wants what he can’t have.
Step two:
Figure out if there is something serious between Aarika and him, if they are fwb or if he’s only playing me.
Step three: Get my friends to talk with him about me, to find out how he feels about it, me, us.”
Oh my God, Taylor. You’re like a fifteen year old girl. You can’t plan step after step, how to win his heart over. Or could I?
“Taylor, what are you doing?” Abi asked. She had probably woken up because of the light from the lamp on my night table. “I’m….” I said and before I even knew it she had my paper in her hands. “TAYLOR ALISON SWIFT” she said. I knew that wasn’t a good sign. She would probably lecture me up about how this was a bad idea. “It’s so obvious that you love him. So why don’t you just ask Ellie to talk with him? You don’t have to make him jealous and everything.” I nodded and said she was right. Then we went back to sleep. Or she did, I kept planning everything in my head. Because I knew I couldn’t ask Ellie. Because she would get that I still am in love with him….wait, did I just…well I guess it’s true. I’m still in love with him.
I slept some hours that night, dreaming about Adam and I starting over, buying a house, getting kids. It was such a beautiful dream. When I woke up that morning I couldn’t help getting tears in my eyes. Because I wanted it to be true so badly.
Abi and I had a lovely morning. We didn’t talk about my letter at all. Maybe she had been too tired when she saw it, that she didn’t remember it. Or maybe she just waited for a better time to bring it up, because she knew I still was in chock. I had probably lost my man. And to who? AARIKA? Okay she seemed really nice, but right now I didn’t like her. Because she could stand in the way for my happily ever after.
I thought a lot about it that morning. It was like I was this new Taylor, that didn’t care that he might have another girl. A Taylor that wanted him to love me, and not her. I knew I couldn’t just steal him, not because you actually can steal a boy, but I couldn’t break her heart. But maybe they were just friends, and then it wouldn’t be “stealing”, that was what I had to tell myself.
I texted Joe. “Hey Joe. Are you ready for 4th? And can I call you?” I didn’t want to break his heart, so I had to make a deal with him. “Hello Taylor! Yeah, I’m so excited! Thank you for inviting me. Sure, what is it?” I took a deep breathe and told myself everything would be okay. Then I hit the call button.
“Taylor! What’s up?” he asked and I didn’t quite know what to answer.
“Joe, yeah….hello. Ehmm…” I said before he interrupted me by saying “Are you going to propose or anything like that? Because Taylor you know I like you and all, but I’m not really sure I’m ready to get married and settle down and everything.”
We both laughed. This is why I liked him so much. This is why I’ve spent so much time with him lately. He’s funny.
“Well, actually no. I’m just a bit heartbroken and you know all the rumors that’s going around right now….” I said, just waiting for him to tell me yes. And a moment or so later that’s exactly what he did. I took another deep breath and said “What do you say about kind of playing along?” All I got was silence. “I mean….we can be seen together and all that, but not too much. Not kissing and stuff like that, just us hanging out. I mean you will get publicity and I’ll get…”
“ADAM” he said. He was smart, I liked that, but I kind of wish he didn’t understand.
“Well I hope so….” was all I answered.
“What you described is basically a friendship Taylor, just that you wanna hang out with me more openly than we’re doing today. And I guess I’m not a huge fan off the reason why, but I like you, so sure” he said. I smiled. He was okay with it! “Thank you, thank you, thank you. I owe you one.” I told him.
Before we hung up we talked a bit about today. We planned on going to my RI house together, but meeting on the airport because he was in London and I was in Nashville. And maybe some paps would take a picture of us at the airport, and for the first time in a very long time, I didn’t mind it. Because I knew that if Adam still loved me, it would kill him to see me together with Joe.
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I know it’s pretty short, but the next part will be out tomorrow so you just have to wait a bit longer to find out what happens, and what Adam thinks about it all!
