@chickentits / chickentits.tumblr.com
before the magnus protocol fully comes out and everyone jumps on the lena bandwagon bc she’s a hot evil woman i NEED it be known that i have been an elias fucker since day one i am not a follower i have faced persecution defending him you can check my records
sometimes i wonder if every part of my personality these days is a glowing beacon that shrieks to the world "this woman has a tumblr account!" and i start to get legitimately concerned about it except then i remember that all the people best equipped to recognize the signs in the wild are also on this website so. devil's sacrament, etc. the fact that the phrase "devil's sacrament" came so readily to my mind just then is probably a point in favor of an affirmative answer to that first question isn't it
the fact that we all understood what you meant by "devil's sacrament" without a second thought is proof of the second statement
no matter how terrible my day is. i can always end my day in bed imagining fictional characters making out sloppy style and fucking raw. and that's beautiful. there's some good in this world mister frodo and it's worth fighting for
uh oh
UH OH
(me, my parents, my sister, and the baby are sitting at the kitchen table eating lunch)
baby, pointing at the light fixture over the table and signing "on": o.*
my sister: we actually can't turn that light on right now, because the lightbulb inside is burnt out! it needs a new one.
baby: ighbu.
sister: yes, lightbulb! granddaddy said after we eat he's going to climb up there on a ladder and change it, and then the light will come on!
baby: gadada! adda, uuu! ighbu o!
sister: exactly!
baby, signing "on" and pointing at the light and then my dad, with increasing urgency: GADADA ADDA UUUU. O.
my sister: we're going to finish eating first though, ok?
baby: nonono. O. gadada adda uuu.
[a split second goes by]
baby, pointing to himself: ba. adda uuu. ighbu.
me: you're going to climb the ladder and change the lightbulb yourself?
baby: dzyeah. *pointing to the buckle where he is buckled into the high chair* ububu.
me: unbuckle you? so you can change the lightbulb?
baby, highly businesslike: dzyeah.
*pronounced like "on" without the n
happy 4/20
We have to keep reblogging this so future historians will read it and puzzle endlessly over its meaning
The heavy implication that historical ‘abstract’ poetry that people have been analysing for ages without being able to conclude the meaning could have just been shitpost level in-jokes between poets is sending me.
my mom was born on 4/20 in pottstown and smoked weed until the day she died. tumblr pls let me blaze this post in her honor.
happy early birthday to op's dead sponsored weed mom who is finally blazing one more time
to everyone in the tags saying they're smoking weed in her honor i thank you. she would have wanted it this way. here's a photo of her in minecraft sunglasses the last time we went thrifting together.
When I worked in a tea shop, I actually got a few people coming in requesting jasmine tea. Why jasmine? Because that’s what Uncle Iroh would drink on Avatar: The Last Airbender.
So here’s something to think about:
Even though he was royalty, Uncle Iroh was a master of preparing his own tea– even after he left with Zuko, he could always be seen preparing it on his own, eventually opening a successful tea shop when the one he worked at turned out to be awful.
For a firebender, heating a pot of water wouldn’t be difficult– a few seconds of rage and you’d have it at a rolling boil– but a rolling boil would ruin the tea.
The secret to a good cup of tea is often in the temperature of water that you use.
Jasmine, green and white tea tends to need between 160-180* F (71-82*C)– go any higher than that, and you’ll scald the leaves and wind up with bitter tea. Let it steep for too long, and it’ll scald anyway. So you can’t just boil the hell out of it and walk away; to be really good, a cup of tea needs a lower temperature and a softer flame. It needs patience and attention. And that’s where Uncle Iroh excelled.
It was such a wonderful character detail, and I love it so.
…I…wait…I just…b…
*Gags* “This tea is nothing more than hot leaf juice!”
“Uncle…that’s what all tea is.”
“How could a member of my own family say something so horrible?”
DO YOU MEAN THAT ZUKO NEVER PREPARED A GOOD CUP OF TEA BEFORE BECAUSE HE WAS TOO IMPATIENT TO PROPERLY HEAT IT AND THAT IROH PUT TWO AND TWO TOGETHER RIGHT THEN AND THERE?
“We’ll have to make some major changes around here!” — His next line which he says firmly, grabbing the teapot and looking at Zuko as he turns.
Like literally after this the main plotpoint between these two is Iroh teaching Zuko how to be more patient/kind/open-minded while also teaching him how to properly work in the tea shop and I just…do you mean to tell me those two were actually not just random meshing plotpoints but were a direct correlation?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME, BRYKE!?
my personal ethic of Not Being A Fucking Bummer is REALLY being tested lately holy fuck
it’s hard to be a hater who wants other people to have a nice time with something they enjoy ://
op tryna make bees come outta ppls bones
Thank you for appreciating my image cropping
hold on. Was suck him good and hard through his jorts supposed to conjour the image of someone who has an unzipped fly because this entire time I've been imagining someone slurping on wet denim
Truly one of the sentences of all time. Wetpilled denimmaxer
girl meant to haunt the narrative has been dragged back into it and is soooo mad about it
she's fucking shit up she's swatting glasses of water off the table like a cat because soooomebody around here wouldn't let her stay dead 🙄
Kiss me. [requested by anon]
As someone who buys a shit tonne of vintage and retro items all the time I need to tell you about the "shart zone" and "prime nuclear cockroach material"
when buying used items i will do anything in my power to avoid the shart zone, which is in the range of 5-10 years old, this is a short enough amount of time for especially electronic items to have not found a way to fall apart horribly but have become out dated enough to have no support and likely will not retain any value. I do however LOVE the nuclear cockroach material zone which is anything 20+ years old. If it still works after 20 years it is going to work forever. A great example of this is my pc which exists in the shart zone and has to be revved up to turn on lawnmower style, but my N64 works fine.
HELP THIS IS MAKING ME CHUCKLE REVVED UP LAWN MOWER STYLE
By revved up lawnmower style what I mean is my pc needs to be turned on by pressing the on button repeatedly until it gets the idea. Doing CPR on that cunt
