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DOWN WITH COMMERCIALISM!

@catatonicfrommiskatonic / catatonicfrommiskatonic.tumblr.com

|| INTJ, or, Majestically Wroth || A spiritual mix of Herbert West, Captain Sisko, & Sonny Crockett... Posts accordingly. || #Team Free Will 2.0
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I have such bad dysphoria right now (every day, lbr); it’s making me physically ill. My own body is killing me. Send help, for real.

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I’m going to be shutting down the fundraiser. It’s just not getting me the help I need... My skin is in the worse shape it’s ever been in, and my chest muscles ache, and my back is so bad I don’t even want to leave the house.

If anyone has any suggestions as to how I can get top surgery funding/aid, then by all means come talk to me. There’s not a lot of hope for me, otherwise.

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catatonicfrommiskatonic
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catatonicfrommiskatonic

Thanks to everyone who has donated thus far; every dollar helps! That aside, this is actually a very time-sensitive matter. The sooner I can accomplish this surgery, the better off I will be- not only physically, but mentally.

But my body is the more pressing issue here...

I’ve read over and over that top surgery becomes less viable the longer a person binds their chest. I haven’t been formally binding as long as some, and I’m currently using a very safe style, all things considered. However, I am already starting to show negative effects from binding; as well, I have other problems related to the binding, such- Bruising, caused from me emptying the clogged pores which are all over my chest due to the inordinate amount of sweat that plagues my upper half with or without binding. My armpits are in a constant state of BURNING. And I don’t even wear my binder but 2-4 hrs a day. Oh. My boobs are starting to turn inwards (for lack of a better term), too.

Right. I can’t even exercise right now because- Well, going bra-less is not an option but wearing a bra has deteriorated my neck and posture, so, again- not an option. Binders... Everyone advises to never exercise while wearing it...

(don’tcrydon’tcrydon’tcry, self)

I AM IN PAIN. ALL. THE. TIME.

I need to get the weight off my chest and I need to get the excessive clothing off my chest.

Please, spread this message around as widely as you can. Even if you cannot afford to donate, or don’t wish to for whatever reasoning, you can reblog. Reblog to save my life. This is not an exaggeration.

#signal boost#surgery tw#dysphoria tw
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I realise I’ve been all but absent from this blog but I nevertheless appreciate each and every one of my (non-spam) followers and friends who have stuck by me in the past and present-ish.

Of course it’s difficult for anyone who has not experienced childhood trauma and abuse, and especially existential and physiological dysphoria- to understand where I’m at (past my prime; breaking point), but in the coming days I hope to establish a personal fundraiser for top surgery and it would mean a LOT to me if you would all contribute-- Ten dollars, one dollar. A nickel. Anything. Anything to give me HOPE. Frankly, I don’t have anywhere else to turn to... Family is against me, I’ve not a single “real world” friend, and I don’t have much money of my own. My health is declining at an alarming rate. I’ve gained 60 pounds where I could lose a hundred, and emotionally I’ve put on about a thousand more. My medications are as high as they will go, and the scary part is they just barely hold me together...

#CFM ;; personal
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estrangedaframian
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estrangedaframian

// Please spread, and, if possible, donate! Any amount will help me. I am desperate for this procedure. Please, please, please… This will change my life for the better! Binding isn’t nearly effective enough and puts more strain on my frame than I need (I already visit the chiro once a week, and binding isn’t going to make those trips any less frequent)…

#signal boost
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