absolute cryptid of a bitch

burn out

Internet hugs for anyone else out there dealing with burn out or other mental and/or physical issues that make it hard to interact right now

you are 16. you are talking with a gay man in his 50s or 60s, a friend, huge and gentle with a scarf and short fluffy curls of gray hair, who has directed you in two plays staged in your mid-size artsy town. (he has not yet asked you to be in his production of The Laramie Project which will change your life. this conversation will also change your life.)

he is talking about theatre. he is talking about theatre when he was younger. he says, "of course, it was AIDS then." in the pause, you ask him. clumsy and quiet and 16 and "straight," you ask him. what was it like.

he takes a moment in which his face is not like a person's face. "there was a time," he says, "i'm not sure how long, years. when i went to a funeral every weekend." he tells you about two funerals in a day, and choosing between friends when you couldn't make it to both. he does not look at you, he looks at them. his wet grey gaze is so clear that you start to see ghosts. it will be years before you understand why it feels like your grief too. why the ghosts call you family.

The older I get, and the more on fire the world seems to be the more I feel comforted and SEEN by Sir Terry Pratchett and Discworld.

Not because all the books are inherently comfortable so much as because they feel like someone taking you by the hand and saying; “I know. I’m just as angry about this bullshit. But we can hold hands. But the sun still rises. But hope is still important. Hope wears steel toed boots and smiles with pink and bloody teeth and will make you laugh and will make you cry. It’s not okay. But we’re in the shit together, and some day it’s gonna be less shit.”

This got away from me.

What I’m saying is, I’ve got a shovel.

The Crane Wife by CJ Hauser

I saw this question posed on tiktok, but I think Tumblr would really enjoy it too.

If a fae creature offered to give one million dollars for a bone chosen at random, how many bones would you allow them to take?

Light clarifications; The fae is not the one choosing the bones. The bone is taken at random. Each bone, no matter the size or importance, is worth a full million dollars. You must also declare the exact number first, you can't go bone-by-bone. You either say 2 or you say 10, you can't work your way up to a higher number. The bones are removed instantaneously, and the money is given immediately as well. You will not get in government trouble for acquiring the money.

Tell me in the tags/replies how many bones you'd let the fae take. And as always, reblog for bigger sample size.

if you want to test your luck, this site lets you choose a random human bone :) https://randomlistgenerator.com/human-bones

turn up that fucking hurdy gurdy

The thing neurotypicals tend not to understand about the ADHD brain is that it really only has two gears

I turn to the chalkboard and carefully write out

WORKIN' HARD

HARDLY WORKIN'

Much like a cars transmission getting stuck between gears the adhd brain can also access a secret mode called HORKLY WARDIN' that feels bad

Indigenous peoples of the great plains should've never told white people about tornadoes. "I don't know man that shit never happened before you showed up"

all goofing aside I genuinely don't understand the urge to reimagine Taylor Allison Swift as a secretly queer icon when the pop music scene(TM) is like. literally overflowing with women who actually like women. Gaga and Kesha and Miley and Halsey are right there. Rina Sawayama and Hayley Kiyoko and Rebecca Black and Kehlani and Victoria Monét and Miya Folick if you're willing to get slightly less top 100. Janelle and Demi for them nonbinary takes on liking girls. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't enjoy Taylor but why would you hang all your little gay hopes on her.

Isn’t Lady Gaga bisexual?

yes that is indeed why she's on the list of famous women who like women

why have multiple people reblogged this with some horse-assed "um actually most of these people are bi or pan" did I fucking stutter I said they like girls. what is your point. I'm going to kill you.

#op probably has this post muted but the icon is too real.

the icon is because of this post

POV: you make a good post and then encounter tumblr reading comprehension

btw to just clarify for anyone who sees this reblog of this post

op is basically saying something along the lines of "yea ik taylor swift is bi but like. why is she y'all's only lgbtq+ pop icon when there are all these other lgbtq+ people in the pop scene???"

i might have worded this badly but hopefully i got the main point across

hi op here I certainly did not fucking say Taylor Swift is bi

Op is saying that liking Taylor for being QUEER or Lgbtqia+ is not a bad thing, but to also know she is not the only one.

He did not call anyone in the original post lesbian bi or pan.

He did call two people NB

you have to be fucking with me there's no way

#Op you gonna have to make a graph

on it:

#I think it’s so funny I got that damn Taylor swift ad underneath this#anyways this is reminding me of that makeup post from way back when#where someone was saying no makeup is a valid way to wear your face and everyone kept insisting that you only need like….4 products

yeah that was also my post

from nebraska earlier today. this has got to be some of the craziest tornado footage i have ever seen. from @nickgormanwx

does that other storm chaser's car have "LOL" written on it with duct tape or am I misinterpreting something

You know when Terry Pratchett said 'It doesn't stop being magic just because you know how it works'? Yeah, he meant this.

English added by me :)

#masc men in dresses are so incredibly sexy

YES. YESSSSS.

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

#tapping the reblog button with utmost care because i’m handling a historical artifact (via @malarkiness)

Made a discord sticker for study dates with my friend! Feel free to use it (noncommercially of course)

[ID: Two cats facing away from each other. The one on the left is gray and wears orange headphones while staring at a laptop screen. The one on the right is orange and draws on a tablet with a stylus. Light orange text above and below them says, "Parallel play / tonight queen?" End ID.]