• “Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?”
• “My teen angst bullshit now has a body count.”
• "Our love is God."
• "If you were happy every day of your life, you wouldn’t be a human being. You’d be a game show host."
• "Are we going to prom or to hell?"
• "Fuck me gently with a chainsaw."
• "Do I look like Mother Teresa?"
• "Wanna go out tonight? Catch a movie? Miniature golf?"
• “It’s one thing to want someone out of your life, but it’s another thing to serve them a wake-up cup full of liquid drainer.”
• “Is this turnout weak or what? I had at least 70 more people at my funeral.”
• "God, my afterlife is so boring. If I have to sing Kumbaya one more time…”
• "Let’s go get a slushie."
• “Will someone tell me why I smoke these damn things?”
• “Lick it up, baby. Lick. It. Up.”
• “This isn’t just a spoke in my menstrual cycle.”
• "There are no stupid questions."
• “If you think I’m doing another suicide note you’re wrong!”
• “I say we just grow up, be adults and die.”
• “Why do you have to be such a mega-bitch?”
• “When I get that feeling, I need sexual healing.”
• “I just killed my best friend.”
• “She’s my best friend. God, I hate her.”
• "You know what I want? Cool guys like you out of my life.”
• “What do you think I’m going to do with it, take out her tonsils?”
• ”___, my love. There’s a new sheriff in town.”
• “You don’t deserve my fucking speech.”
• "Tomorrow, I’ll be kissing her aerobicized ass, but tonight, let me dream of a world without ___, a world where I am free."
• “She belly-flopped in front of a car wearing a suicide note.”
• “If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?”
• “What’s the up-chuck factor on that?”
• "How very."
• “Did that sound bitchy?”
• "I don’t know. This kind of thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth."

• "Sorry, I’m kinda drunk."
• "I wish that this night would never be over."
• "I’m not broken, but I need a fix."
• "I’m here for your entertainment."
• "All I ever do is overthink and drink until I attack."
• "How do we take back what’s been done, what’s been said?"
• "My heart’s beating faster, I know what I’m after."
• "Once I’m in, I own your heart."
• "No one wins when love breaks down."
• "I could never leave your side, no matter what I say."
• "Just keep holding my hand."
• “If I wanted to leave I would have left by now.”
• "I bet you thought I was soft and sweet."
• "We don’t need any diamonds and gold."
• "Wait ‘til you get a load of me."
• "I really need you near me to keep my mind off the edge."
• "Who are you and where are you from?"
• "Give it to you until you’re screaming my name."
• "It’s not the first time, it’s not the worst crime."
• "If I had you, life would be a party."
• "It’s late at night and I can’t sleep."
• "I wanna see you strut."
• "Once upon a time, I didn’t give a damn."
• "Walk that walk like you don’t give a fuck."
• "I’m gonna lose my mind!"
• "Have you lost your way?"
• "Would you be mine?"
• "I’m sick of laying down alone."
• "I’m so sick of living for other people!"
• "Come on and follow me."
• "You make me want to listen to music again."
• "I’m not giving up on us."
• "Thanks for loving me."
• "None of us are promised to see tomorrow."
• "I don’t wanna hide any part of me from you."

"I wake up alone with it all." "You know that I’m falling and I don’t know what to say." “I want to be with you everywhere.” "It all comes down to you." "I have no fear, I have only love." "I still see your bright eyes." "Can you understand me?" "Don’t you hand me a line." "Let me hand you my love." "Hold me." "How am I going to manage you?" "I’ll be waiting for you if you ever want to be there." "I’ve been afraid of changing because I’ve built my life around you." "Time makes you bolder." "Tell me sweet little lies." "Close your eyes." "We’re better off apart." "Let’s give it a try." "Monday morning you sure look fine." "First you love me and then you fade away." "I’ve got nothing but love for you." "All the saints and sinners, they pay handsomely." "Wait a minute, baby." "Stay with me a while." "Said you’d give me light, but you never told me about the fire." "I’m drowning in the sea of love where everyone would love to drown." "Never change." "I think I have met my match." "There’s a heartbeat and it never really died." "You can’t get enough of it." "Don’t make me wait." "It’s not that funny, is it —— no one to turn you on?" "When you look at me with those brown eyes, what do you want to do?" "Do you have to have me the way that I want you?" “Will you take me all the way?” "Why don’t you ask him if he’s going to stay?" "Why don’t you tell me what’s going on?" "Why don’t you tell me who’s on the phone?" "Don’t say that you love me. Just tell me that you want me." "I don’t hold you down. Maybe that’s why you’re around." "Never have I been a blue calm sea. I have always been a storm." "All I know is the way that I feel whenever you’re around." "You’ve got a way of lifting me up instead of bringing me down." "You look at me and I just melt." "Who wrote the book of love?" "I’m out of my mind, but it’s only over you." "You’ve got me mystified." "I’m through waiting for you." “I don’t know why I always trusted.” “Sometimes I think that I must have been crazy to wait on you.” “I decided yesterday that I would leave you.” “I believe that I know you.” "I never did believe in time changing anybody’s mind." "I can’t define love like it should be."

• ❝I just don’t think it’s a good idea for me to sleep over anymore, you know?❞
• ❝I’m not suggesting leather straps and Crisco, just a kiss.❞
• ❝Actually something a little sexy would be good, I gotta a maybe sorta date this evening.❞
• ❝Well, I’m a Pisces, I’m into body piercings, and men with tattoos.❞
• ❝ Uh, excuse me, young man! This woman here thinks you’re very attractive!❞
• ❝Oh god, she’s perfect.❞
• ❝Well, if you can stand the shock, I actually came to see you. I need some advice.❞
• ❝ It’s just that he seemed so disappointed in me, which of course made me angry and now I don’t know where we are.❞
• ❝First of all, girls are attracted to romance more than anything.❞
• ❝I want you to look at me and see the person you’ve always known and realize that what we have is so much more incredible than just some passing physical attraction…❞
• ❝Oh, the first date. This will be interesting. Hey, what’s wrong?❞
• ❝ Good because I know a good motel.❞
• ❝Why are you so angry.❞
• ❝Well, be proud of yourself. Enjoy this moment. A loser like you probably won’t have many more like it.❞
• ❝Here I am single, sandwiched in-between two women who both dumped me. I am pathetic.❞
• ❝Why is it that we’re so ridiculously intent on pleasing the people who dislike us the most?❞
• ❝ It’s not too late to bail, okay? Believe me.❞
• ❝So you’re a smartass? Guess that’s why they put us together. People think I’m a smartass too.❞
• ❝True Love isn’t a person, it’s an idea. An unattainable idea.❞
• ❝You have no problem taking a swing at a guy, but you can’t tell a girl how you feel about her. Man, your pathetic.❞
• ❝ Am I supposed to feel good knowing that I have the power to change somebody’s life?❞
• ❝What makes a girl decide to spend the night with a guy she hardly knows?❞