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The Chloe Joyce

@thechloejoyce / thechloejoyce.tumblr.com

the Holy Trinity, Person of interest and the 100 - Pronouns [She/Her] :)
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997

karma got its kiss for me……. thats 2017 in one video

im still so obsessed

The fucking crying/talking/screaming just kills me. Like she was so upset 😭

I might have to remake this video

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Beginner Levels

  • 0:59 - The eraser tool
  • 1:42 - The Magic Wand Tool
  • 2:00 - The Quick Selection Tool
  • 2:36 - Polygonal Lassoo Tool
  • 2:58 - The Pen Tool

Intermediate/Advanced Levels

  • 4:04 - Tonal Selection (The “So that’s how they do it!” stage)
  • 5:24 - Color Range
  • 5:53 - Mask Selection
  • 6:12 - Layer Masks
  • 6:41 - Clipping Masks

Pro Tips (7:05 - onwards)

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secondlastk

u dont understand how disappointed i am that this dog didnt appear on my dash this year and how hard i tried to find a post that included both pictures

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There's this Thing that y'all don't seem to get.

Gryffindors don’t give a shit about rules. The most hardline of them don’t even care about people. They care about justice. Right or wrong, black or white, there are no shades of grey. If it’s just, it’s always just; if it’s unjust, it’s always wrong. Hermione’s ruthlessness makes her a Gryffindor. She is absolutely sure that she is on the side of justice in everything that she does, and it’s such a Gryffindor trait.

Because Slytherins are ruthless, but they care about rules. Their own rules, usually, but rules nonetheless. They will impose parameters and limitations on themselves just so they have a framework to operate within. If doing something means violating their own internal code, then they’re not gonna do it. Even fucking Voldemort is like that. He broke every single fucking rule the Wizarding World ever put in place, but damn if he’d break his own.

And Ravenclaws? They hate rules. Fucking things just get in the way. They prevent creativity and keep people from accomplishing their goals. Ravenclaws are probably some of the most dangerous people in the entirety of the book series, because they’re brilliant and creative and ambitious and prideful, and when they snap, they do not have inhibitions. They will wreck everything that ever had the nerve to get in their way, and they will never once feel bad about it.

And then there’s Hufflepuffs. They emphasize equality. If the playing field is equal, then all other good things will come from there. People hear that, and they think that Hufflepuffs are pushovers. They cast them as the shy ones, the fearful ones, the insecure ones. Really, they’re none of these things. They are nice, accepting, friendly, this is all true, but they are also entirely willing to fight anyone that steps up to the plate talking shit. Hufflepuffs will defend themselves and other people until they drop dead, and it’s infuriating to see that only ever attributed to Gryffindors. Because the big difference is that a Gryffindor believes in acceptable causalties, and a Hufflepuff will knock your teeth down your fucking throat for even suggesting such a disgusting idea. For Hufflepuffs, there are no acceptable casualties; any loss of life is utterly unacceptable.

There are a lot of people that talk about House stereotyping, and then turn around and perpetuate further stereotypes. Gryffindors are not necessarily knights in shining armor; Slytherins are not necessarily callous villains; Ravenclaws are much more than just intelligent, and Hufflepuff is not the motherfucking potato House.

Proud Puff.

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27snowflakes

No wonder hogwarts is so dangerous. No one fucking follows the rules.

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Fanfic Prompts Masterpost

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idoltina
carmillasmaster:
Mainly for me cause I’m always browsing my blog to find them back. Hope you enjoy too.
Oh God I’m So Sorry AU Prompts - wintergrey - post
  • we were playing a pickup game of basketball and I elbowed you in the face and that’s a lot of blood I’m so sorry
  • I was in a hurry and I ran into you outside the coffee shop while you were carrying two lattes and it turns out they were both for you except that now you’re wearing them I’m so sorry
  • this is my first job waiting tables and wow these plates are heavy but I’m doing my best which apparently isn’t enough to defy gravity I’m so sorry
  • I love hockey, I am Ruler of the Rink and apparently I don’t know my own strength because I just crushed you into the boards I’m so sorry
  • running is supposed to be good for your health except I seem to have sprained my ankle and I took you out with me I’m so sorry
  • I was in the middle of a sick skateboard trick when you walked into my path and I couldn’t stop in time I’m so sorry
  • being a bike courier is great for my legs and it makes me good money and I meet hot people by running them over I’m so sorry
  • these super powers are so awesome it’s so exciting but I have zero control over them and I’m so sorry
  • you look a lot like my good friend so I ran up behind you and grabbed your ass with both hands in front of everyone I’m so sorry
  • I was hired to walk up to you and kiss you in public for the paparazzi and I only did it because I’m broke but you are a good guy and a good kisser I’m so sorry
  • I am the worst at parallel parking I mean I am so sorry about your fender I really hope one of us has insurance I’m so sorry
  • formal events are not my thing these shoes are new and this is a very long staircase at least you were at the bottom to break my fall I’m so sorry
Some AUs - peggyicarter - post
  • ‘you’re a celebrity incognito trying to hide from paparazzi and you’re sitting right next to me and i’m the only one that recognizes you’ au
  • ‘someone starts a rumor that we’re dating so let’s turn the tables’ au
  • ‘you made an obscure literary reference and i’m the only on that got it’ au
  • ‘we were both late to class and walked into each other in the hall and oh god do you have a concussion? i’m so sorry’ au
  • ‘oh my god you’re my ex’s other ex’ au
  • ‘we’re both actors and keep showing up for the same auditions’ au
  • ‘i keep overhearing you make fun of me so i finally try to stand up for myself and it actually had nothing to do with me at all i’m sorry i never meant for this to happen’ au
  • ‘we’re both teachers and all our students ship us’ au
  • ‘i kissed the wrong person on news years’ au
  • ‘i’m yelling to my friend about how attractive this celebrity is and then plot twist you’re the celebrity and in front of me wtf’ au
  • ‘the only two people in the movie theater’ au
  • ‘we showed up at a party wearing the same exact outfit. this is awkward.’ au
Cliche fanfic trope - teenagefrankzhang - post
  • Spin the bottle
  • truth or dare
  • TWISTER
  • friends locking them in a closet together
  • lab partners
  • one tutoring the other
  • nerd and jock
  • rival sports teams
  • blind date
  • stuck in detention
  • arguing but secretly being kind of turned on by it
  • P R E T E N D I N G  T O  B E  D A T I N G
AUs Ideas - doctordirectioner5 - post
  • ‘we work on the same floor and you always break the printer’ AU
  • ‘I went to the shelter to buy a cat but you want the same cat’ AU
  • ‘we are in the same cooking class and one time you forget to put the top on the blender’ AU
  • ‘I always sing along to the song you are playing on the piano in the apartment below’ AU
  • ‘we are on the same bus and you always read my favorite book’ AU
  • ‘In my art class you are a model that the class has to draw/paint/sketch’AU
  • ‘I was walking down the street and saw you doing something very suspicious so i followed you’ AU
  • ‘We are apartment neighbors and you snore really REALLY loud’ AU
  • ‘I was dancing in my room just to realize my window was open and you live next door’ AU
  • ‘We are in the same bird watching group’ AU
  • ‘I go to a medieval festival and you are one of the knights there’ AU
  • ‘My water bottle wouldn’t open so I threw it and it hit you’ AU
  • ‘I got to comic con and you are dressed as the character that many people ship with the character I am dressed up as’ AU
  • ‘ I was walking down the sidewalk and you fell out of a tree just as I walked by’ AU
AUs for when your OTP are both assholes - jonahryan - post
  • You drive a massive SUV and steal my parking spot all the time and I was just heading out to leave a strongly worded note under your windshield wiper but oh no you’re hot AU
  • I’m a barista and you’re the obnoxious customer who comes through and orders a venti macchiato while talking on the phone the whole time so I misspell your name in increasingly creative ways every day AU
  • I’m a busy businessperson and my barista keeps misspelling my name in increasingly disrespectful ways, honestly, who does this person think they are AU
  • We were both playing wingman for our friends who have now decided to go home together, and after five minutes of conversation we fucking hate each other, let’s bang it out AU
  • I saw you trying to hit the “door close” button in the elevator but I made it in and then I pushed every single button to make you later for work, but now we’re stuck in this fucking elevator as it stops at every single floor and I don’t know what to say other than “you started it” AU
  • I asked for your help getting a book off the top shelf and and you laughed at my taste and called me a nerd so I shoved you into a table of nonfiction best-sellers and that’s how we both got banned from the quirky community bookstore AU
  • I take my grades very seriously and you’re the lazy asshole who asks a ton of off-topic questions to distract the professor and I might be a foot shorter than you but I swear to god I’ll fight you AU
  • You tried to barge into a private conversation so I said something devastatingly witty and dismissive but you came back with something even meaner and more clever AU
  • Shouting match over the last Thanksgiving turkey at the grocery store AU
AUs age appropriate - haydenbyerly - post
  • We’re in a project together at school so we exchanged numbers but you accidentally butt dialed me and I found out that you kinda sorta like me a little bit au
  • You fell asleep in class and I covered for you even though we’ve never talked au
  • We take the same bus to school and there weren’t any more seats so you had to sit by me au
  • You moved after elementary school but came back for hs and we picked up right where we left off au
  • We follow each other on tumblr and decided to meet and it is actually the kid from my school that I always thought was a jerk au
  • I heard you talking shit about my fav so naturally I came to yell at you but found out you weren’t talking about the same show and you actually love the same character I love au
  • You laughed at my joke/pun in class when everyone else groaned and now you wanna hear more au
  • My parents told me to get a tutor in math so asked you for help bc I know you’re smart but the only thing I’ve learned so far is that you are cute au
  • You didn’t even know me but you saw I was sad and tried to cheer me up au
  • I noticed you looking at my test answers and I pushed my paper closer to you so you could get a better look au
  • We used to be friends in elementary school but we grew apart and now we’re in high school math together and you said one of our inside jokes out loud au
  • You’re a trouble maker so the teacher thought that changing seats so little perfect me was sitting next to you was a good idea but now we both get in trouble au
  • Meet in detention au
  • You saw me drop a lot of papers in the hall and were the only one who helped me pick them up au
  • We were both late to class and you asked me if I wanted to skip with you and I said okay au
  • We have a class set of books and when I opened mine I saw what you wrote and I wrote back so we’re kinda pen pals au
  • We don’t have any classes together but we smile and wave at each other in the halls au
  • You said something in class that made me realize you have the same secret obsession with (Zac Efron) as I do au
  • I saw your dog and ran to pet it w/o noticing who the owner was but now I see you and wow au
  • I created a hot sim in The Sims 4 and it looks EXACTLY like you au
  • I was reading fanfic on the school computer and you saw and realized it was yours au
Bad at dating - notallbees - post
  • I can’t tell whether this is a date because you asked to see a movie but I’m still not sure you’re queer, and I’m toeing the line because maybe you’re just trying to make friends
  • One of us thinks this is a date but the other thinks it’s an informal job interview
  • I decided to flip a coin about every decision in my life for a week and that’s how we ended up on a date
  • We’re both meant to be going on blind dates with other people but we sat down at the wrong table and got our hopes up
  • We took each other’s underwear from the laundromat by mistake
  • I got drunk and sent a sexy naked pic to my ex but I sent it to you instead by mistake
  • We had one really bad date and never spoke again and now our friends have set us up on a blind date
  • I’m calling to cancel our date because I’m actually in the ER right now, sorry. …I mean, sure, I guess you can come down here, but… okay…
  • We had sex at the office party but we’re both workaholics so we don’t normally date
  • We’re going on a blind date - but wait a moment, aren’t you that went down on me in a back alley behind a club year ago? … what do you mean “which one”?
  • You bought me at a charity auction and you’re probably a serial killer
  • You’re my waiter and I’m on a really crappy date with an asshole
  • Your appointment with a sexual therapist was right after mine and we got talking in the waiting room
  • We’re on a blind date, but wait a moment… aren’t you that guy who gave me a hand job at a Renaissance Faire a year ago?… what do you MEAN “WHICH ONE”?
  • We both picked the same power ballad at karaoke so we sang a duet
  • We’re both trying to take advantage of the unlimited appetizers deal on separate dates at TGI Fridays and I got the mozzarella sticks and I’m on my sixth plate and I want to die, can I PLEASE swap you for some of your wings?
AU - ironinkpen - post
  • “You’re a celebrity and I’m a paparazzo, sorry friend I have to take pictures of you to pay my rent next month” AU
  • “You’re a store clerk and oh shit I just spotted my ex please let me hide behind your desk-thing” AU
  • “I don’t know you but I need some place to stay for the night, my roommate’s getting some” AU
  • “I’m helping my niece’s girl scout troop sell cookies and hell no, fuck off soccer coach, we were here first” AU
  • “This has been a very bad week and you just grabbed the last box of my favorite comfort food at the supermarket” AU
  • “You’ve locked yourself outside of your apartment and there’s a storm rolling in and I pity you so I’ll let you into mine” AU
  • “We’re neighbors who don’t really talk but your cat might have gotten my cat pregnant?? We must raise this little kitty family together” AU
  • “A toddler broke your nose and I may or may not have snapped my thumb during a very intense game of Mario Kart and now we’re both sitting next to each other in the hospital waiting room” AU
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If anyone wants something remove or added just message me. 
Also 
important college AUs to consider for your otp:
  • “i’m the grader for this class and you have literally the worst handwriting i have ever seen. i am tracking you down to warn you that if you turn in another pset like this i will have to give you a zero because i cannot understand anything you have written”
  • “we casually hook up at parties sometimes but this time you got so drunk you couldn’t make it all the way back to your dorm so i let you crash in my room because it was closer and it turns out you’re really cute when you wake up in the morning, fuck”
  • “you live in the room next door to mine and you have been playing the mountain goats very loudly for the past five hours. are you. i mean. are you okay.”
  • “you live in the room next door to mine and you’re always having really loud sex, what the fuck”
  • “we’ve never talked but your favorite spot in the library is right across from my favorite spot so i see you all the time and sometimes we give each other commiserating looks”
  • “did you claim the tv room for a star wars marathon the same day i was planning to claim it for a lord of the rings marathon”
  • “we don’t know each other that well but we’re in the same circle of friends and they’re all abroad this semester so it looks like we’ll be spending a lot more time together while they’re gone”
  • “my friends and i are trying to study in this empty classroom, you and your friends seem to be having a very loud impromptu dance party in the adjacent room, i went over to tell you to shut up but somehow you convinced me to join in”
Fun AUs
“You saw your ex coming your way with their new significant other and freaked out. You grabbed my hand, whispered a quick plea to let you propose to me in front of them. I agreed because you’re cute” AU
“Oh no, my ex is at our high school reunion and their significant other is hot. I grabbed your hand and started flirting wildly with you as they walked by” AU
“I play the violin and you play the saxophone and we’ve been fighting over this corner for weeks now” AU
“I’m the one who started screaming in the middle of campus during finals week. You’re the one I saw spitting their drink out of their nose laughing” AU
“Sorry my little sibling dragged me over here to squeal over your hair. It’s so bright what did you use because I’ve never managed to get that good a color in my hair” AU
“I’m having a shitty day and you just ordered the last piece of my favorite pie” AU
disgustingly cute domestic scenes to imagine your otp in:
  • getting slightly too drunk in the middle of the afternoon and slow dancing to dumb cheesy old music and kissing in a way that’s more laughter than actual kissing, mouths clumsy and hands gripping tight and sunlight slanting over them as they move lazily together
  • curling up on the sofa together, feet tucked under thighs and arms around shoulders, watch the kind of crap tv that only airs at 3am because they don’t want to go to untangle themselves to go to bed
  • hectic mornings when they each need to be somewhere and they’re rushing around each other, ducking into bathrooms and bedrooms and kitchen cupboards, pausing to straighten tops and press kisses to cheeks
  • going through old photos together and collapsing into laughter every three pictures, and zooming in on ones where they’re pulling awful faces or ones that were taken at just the wrong moment
  • getting ready for nights out together, standing shoulder to shoulder as they brush their teeth or get their faces ready or style their hair, knocking elbows and hips as they try and hog more space
  • standing quietly together in the kitchen after long, exhausting days, leaning into each other for support, breathing in the smell of home, fingers carding through hair and stroking down spines, until they feel like they can relax and smile properly again
Tone vocabulary list
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there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator

see what intrigues me about college isn’t the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this

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haedia

Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn’t be counted late. I mean, that’s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance. 

Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning “Look who’s late” face, and walks on inside.

What he didn’t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it” and SCALED THE BUILDING!

She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom. 

He did a double take, started to say “How the hell d—” when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed “STOP DOING THAT!”

omfg the amount of fucks college kids don’t give astounds me

IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREENSHOTS

I LOVE THE IMPLICATION THAT THIS STUDENT HAS A REPUTATION FOR SCALING THE BUILDINGS

Once on my way to class I got in the elevator and the only other person in it was someone dressed in a full chicken suit. Honestly the most unusual part about it was that he was the only other person in the elevator. We rode up a few floors in silence. Chicken wasn’t saying anything and I wasn’t gonna question it because - college.

We get to the next floor, the door pings open, and standing on the other side is a guy dressed in overalls with a pitchfork. Unnamed chicken suit elevator partner reached across me to quickly hit the door close button several times with his wing until we went up to the next floor.

I was absolutely late to class but to this day have never regretted it.

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skypig357

Lmao

modern art

Okay, at this point there has to be something wrong with me, right? I’ve watched this 20 times in the last half hour, I still don’t know what they are saying half the time, but it doesn’t seem to matter because i’ve been crying my eyes out laughing for the entire last half hour …

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vergak

what the fuck is this from i gotta know

it’s called letterkenny and it’s about a man who gets dumped and then goes on to shirk his pacifism and reclaim and hold his title as the toughest dude in the rural town of letterkenny ontario. every episode cold opens like this in increasingly bizarre ways.

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shiftingpath

I read the bit about not being able to parse what’s being said and then I read the bit about it being set in this fuckin province, and I thought, like, what kind of accent could they possibly use that was so incomprehensible while still setting it in northern goddamn Ontario? and actually, okay, you know what, despite having lived immersed in it my entire life I’m not sure i’ve ever seen this exact accent on tv before, it is just weird to see actors using it

My cousins grew up with the guy who wrote this show and is the main actor. It’s scary accurate for hick town Ontario (it’s based on the town of Listowel) and apparently some of the characters are based so closely on real people that they’ve recognized themselves while watching.

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urulokid

MOM BROUGHT FIVE GUYS HOME IM SO EXCITED OH MY GOD

clarification: five guys is a restaurant chain that specializes in gourmet burgers and fries i’m not having an orgy

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mabylc

me: not today, satan 

satan: you’ve been canceling our plans for weeks now. if it’s something i said, please just tell me

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reblogged
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1squirtle

reblogging bc 2017 is the year of me and my followers getting our shit together

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stability

I remember my biggest problem when I was trying to get my first internship was that even though the whole interview went really well, I didn’t know that employers actually want you to ask questions at the end of the interview, which is probably why i got a weird look after saying i had no questions and then never got a response lol. So it’s definitely good to read stuff like this so you know what you have to do succeed

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That point in a piece of fanfiction where you can tell something embarrassing is about to happen so you start fucking around on tumblr because you’re a huge baby with a crippling overabudance of empathy.

I do this with every media I consume. I pause movies and have to walk around and prepare myself for second-hand embarrassment sometimes.

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