@orcababymakoto / orcababymakoto.tumblr.com
[ Welpen, I had hoped it wouldn't get to this point, but alas, you might have noticed that I haven't really written anything here since August.
The problem? My new work PC allows no access to tumblr. I really thought I could write more at home, but no.
I'm sorry.
I'm trying not to abandon this account, but with my upcoming wedding party everything is pretty busy anyway.
I'll do my best to get back on here. But for now, I'm sorry to say that I'm offline.
M.]
Makoto shook his head gently, feeling butterflies - or spiders? - settle in his chest as he reached for the velvet box in his pocket.
“This is fine,” he said as he turned to take both of Sousuke’s hands in his.
“Sousuke… Um, even if you don’t remember why I’m asking you here, it’s a place of significance for us. The past us, maybe even the ones we are now. I know I put you through a lot when we… Met each other for the first time in this life, and while I regret some things, I think I am happier now. It… It gave us the chance to start over, get a fresh clean cut.
“When your past you proposed to me, he sent me through half of Tokyo, where I would meet my friends in some kind of game and I loved it. But I was also sad because you weren’t there with me. The places where we’ve been today… I started with the place where we first met, and then followed a few points of interest. I loved that garden and that’s where I wanted to take you for a picnic. I loved the dolphin show back then, but when we went there… it opened up old wounds and I could only grieve over my loss… And yours for not remembering. That’s why I was bawling my eyes out. It’s funny now, but also pretty embarrassing,” Makoto laughed as he sank to his knees, feeling a little out of place, even as he pulled the box out of his pocket.
“Now I’m asking you here, like you did in that other lifetime, do you want to marry me? Not out of obligation, but because I fell in love with who you are now,” he elaborated as he opened the box, his hands so sweaty that he didn’t manage to open it at the first try. Then, he revealed a simple matter silver band, something that looked like Sousuke would wear without fancy stones.
He had felt bad purchasing it because it had been relatively cheap in comparison to everything else, but he didn’t think that anything else suited his lover.
Makoto took his hands and immediately Sousuke knew something was off. The night was finally darkening around them and the castle in front of them and the park all around them were beginning to light up, but Makoto was looking at him in such a strange way that Sousuke hardly noticed. Suddenly, his heart was pounding.
He focused on the words for some clue of what was coming. It’s a place of significance for us… When your past you proposed to me…
Sousuke’s brows rose and his eyes widened, and he was so floored by the realization that he hardly heard much else of what Makoto said about their journey through Tokyo or the dolphin show. This was where he’d proposed before. And he had a feeling that this was where Makoto was about to propose to him.
His heart thundered in his chest and he wondered if he looked as surprised as he felt as Makoto lowered himself to one knee and revealed a small velvet box. He stared at it, and a few of the people around him who had stopped to watch the proposal softly cheered as a silver ring was revealed and Makoto finally asked the question: do you want to marry me?
If not for the shock, he would have answered before Makoto had even finished asking. As it was, he needed just a moment to find his voice again.
The crowd hushed. Even Yoshiko seemed to stare expectantly up at him.
“Yeah.” He nodded, not sure why the front of his face felt pinched until he felt a lone tear run down his cheek. He brushed it away, unable to hide his wide smile as he sank to his knees and wrapped his arms around Makoto, hugging him tight. “Yes. I’ll marry you.”
Makoto waited, his heart pounding in his chest even as he held his breath. Sousuke kept quiet for awfully long, and slowly, Makoto started to get nervous.
Was this too much? Did he ask too soon? Maybe it was out of place after all.
But Yoshiko was looking up herself, curious as to what was going on between the adults that were her dads. She held still even as a lone tear made its way down Sousuke's cheek. Makoto's eyes widened at that, ready to apologize and take it back, but Sousuke said "Yeah."
Not yes, even though that followed as he knelt down to hug Makoto, no, Sousuke said "Yeah," and somehow that was just perfect for them.
"Thank you," Makoto smiled and closed his eyes in the hug, his own tears overflowing just then.
At least they were happy tears.
tag people & add stuff & even change the format to your liking! naturally, repost; don’t reblog!
TAGGED BY: @soudevoted TAGGING: no one because I’m not active atm.
CLASSIC.
black and white. powder puffs. red lipstick. winged eyeliner. white kitten heels. black lace lingerie. icy blue eyes. rain. abandoned cars. skeletons. acid. poison. voyeurism. switchblades. strangling. overcoats. looking over your shoulder. transatlantic accents. private detectives. dinner parties. haunted mansions. cobwebs. perfect blonde curls. kitchen knives. shock. cellars. dust. ghosts. dark alleys. empty streets. horn-rimmed glasses. radiation.zombies. serial murder. suspicion. paranoia. the city. witches. the devil. cannibalism. conspiracies. amulets. abject terror. the American South. the American Northeast. England. analog cameras.
CRYPTID & URBAN LEGEND.
aliens. blinding light. dark woods. driving at night. claw marks. bite marks. men in black. memory loss. dismembered bodies. sewers. flashlights. cell phones. video cameras. cars with tinted windows. unlabeled cassette tapes. bugs. big cities. urban crimes. clowns. something rustling outside your window. glowing light. unsolved mysteries. suburbia. mirrors. the american pacific northwest. the american midwest. hiking. backpacking.
GOTHIC.
gaslights. corsets. ballrooms. candlelight. mist. starless nights. full moons. cobbled streets. horse-drawn carriages. mysterious strangers. bogs. moors. forests. mountains. castles. velvet. silver. brass. gold. jewels. domino masks. the opera. dangerous romances. tragic romances. violins. roses. lilies. empty graves. crosses. cemeteries. snow. ice. the gallows.crows. milk-white skin. ambiguous illness. fangs. pointed nails. something howling in the night. capes. gloves. top hats. straight razors. lightning. pipe organs. underground caverns. bats. mice. rats. ravens. cats. pearls. attics. talismans. axes. wood. isolation in a room full of people. vampires. werewolves. ghosts. coffins. western europe. eastern europe. bones. churches. catacombs. mausoleums. books. stitches.
PARANORMAL.
malevolent spirits. seances. spells. missing bodies. hidden graves. white noise. static. flickering lights. rings of salt. demons. poltergeists. dark histories. old buildings. cold air. wells. urban exploration. a dog barking at unseen things. iconoclasm. black ooze. old photographs. dark bodies of water. crucifixes. priests. possession. exorcisms. dolls.
SLASHER.
bloodbaths. massacres. wanton nudity. newspapers. leather jackets. letterman jackets. converse sneakers. obscured faces. social unrest. bonfires. lakes. babysitters. high school. lockers. dead leaves in the fall. jack-o’-lanterns. passing shadows. outdated television sets. nightmares. psychiatrists. hospitals. unstoppable forces. gunfire. police. landline telephones. improvised weapons. halloween. secrets. revelations. cut wires. character masks. scrunchies. wild curls. jeering children. parties. fire. swearing. revulsion. california. the american midwest. ambulances.
THRILLER.
daylight. fluorescent lighting. morgues. unwavering eye contact. tension. lit rooms. empty rooms. killer in plain sight. a dog digging in the newly-planted flower bed. steely gazes. paperwork. anagrams. codes. convicted killers. missing persons. law enforcement. federal agents. small towns. suspicion. paranoia. subdued terror. dimly-lit parking lots. a noise in the distance.
“If you say so,” Sousuke replied, giving a shrug as they walked on. If Makoto wanted to hold her, that was fine by him. He’d gladly take her when she was sleepy and adorable on the way back home.
They entered the park with the crowds, Sousuke with a firm grip on Makoto so they wouldn’t get separated. The last thing he needed was to get lost in an enormous park filled with so many people.
Makoto led them to the front of the large castle. In the dark, the lights all around them glittered, and a voice announced the fireworks would be starting in the next few minutes. Sousuke looked around, feeling eerily as if he’d been there—in that exact spot—sometime before. As Makoto’s favorite place on earth, though, he couldn’t call that surprising. His former self must have taken him there at least once.
“Should we find a place to sit?” Sousuke asked, tilting his head slightly. Makoto was staring at him, but he couldn’t be sure why. “So we can see the fireworks? Or is this a good spot?”
Makoto shook his head gently, feeling butterflies - or spiders? - settle in his chest as he reached for the velvet box in his pocket.
"This is fine," he said as he turned to take both of Sousuke's hands in his.
"Sousuke... Um, even if you don't remember why I'm asking you here, it's a place of significance for us. The past us, maybe even the ones we are now. I know I put you through a lot when we... Met each other for the first time in this life, and while I regret some things, I think I am happier now. It... It gave us the chance to start over, get a fresh clean cut.
"When your past you proposed to me, he sent me through half of Tokyo, where I would meet my friends in some kind of game and I loved it. But I was also sad because you weren't there with me. The places where we've been today... I started with the place where we first met, and then followed a few points of interest. I loved that garden and that's where I wanted to take you for a picnic. I loved the dolphin show back then, but when we went there... it opened up old wounds and I could only grieve over my loss... And yours for not remembering. That's why I was bawling my eyes out. It's funny now, but also pretty embarrassing," Makoto laughed as he sank to his knees, feeling a little out of place, even as he pulled the box out of his pocket.
"Now I'm asking you here, like you did in that other lifetime, do you want to marry me? Not out of obligation, but because I fell in love with who you are now," he elaborated as he opened the box, his hands so sweaty that he didn't manage to open it at the first try. Then, he revealed a simple matter silver band, something that looked like Sousuke would wear without fancy stones.
He had felt bad purchasing it because it had been relatively cheap in comparison to everything else, but he didn't think that anything else suited his lover.
Makoto turned his gaze away from Yoshiko as the penny seemed to have dropped for Sousuke.
“Mhm, Disneyland. Hopefully in time for the fireworks, too,” he confirmed, his smile brightening.
“Dada!” Yoshiko gurgled, bouncing her stumps legs on Makoto’s legs with barely contained excitement.
“Yes! Disneyland!” Makoto cooed, keeping her stabilized with that hand on her back.
“Fireworks, huh?” he repeated, looking out the window again. The sky was already darkening and would be like pitch soon, the bright city lights blocking out the stars caught in the vast expanse. Fireworks would be nice, he decided. Though, wasn’t it all a bit much just for a birthday? He’d have been content with watching a movie at home or maybe getting a blowjob.
Makoto looked especially enthusiastic about their destination, though, and so did Yoshiko, though she was still too small to really understand where they were going.
“I think she’s saying Daddy,” Sousuke chimed in when Yoshiko’s Dada was somehow interpreted to mean Disneyland. He chuckled, pointing out the silhouette of the large castle in the distance for Yoshiko, who babbled and ooo’d, eyes sparkling. As excited as she seemed, Makoto somehow seemed even more so.
Sousuke kept watch while the train rattled on a little while longer, and then he stood as the train came to a stop. “Want me to hold her? I’m assuming you have tickets or something,” he said as they filtered out of the train with the crowd and began the walk to the front gates of the park.
"I do!" Makoto replied and presented two tickets from his pants' pockets with a determined face. "And no, it's okay. I can still carry her. You can take her on the way home."
They walked to the entrance instead of taking the resort train, following the masses in Disney themed garments. They arrived at the gates and entered with their tickets and then Makoto led them to the place where Sousuke had proposed to him all these years back. He looked at him expectantly to see if he remembered anything or if he was already expecting something.
“Hm, no. It’s fine,” Makoto replied with a smile, handing Sousuke his bento. “I don’t really remember the whole thing myself, so this will be an abridged version anyway.”
He handed Sousuke a pair of chopsticks, too. “Also, we don’t have a whole day, so it’s going to be just two points. Do you want to see the dolphin show we went to when we got to know each other a deep I started bawling like a baby?” He asked, popping a few rice grains into Yoshiko’s mouth before he ate some himself.
The whole thing. Makoto’s words puzzled him, and he tossed the possibilities around in his head about what “thing” he could be referring to. He hadn’t exactly answered his question.
Sousuke held his chopsticks and carefully dug into the bento, picking up the little bits of meat and rice as a gentle breeze blew over them, rustling the leaves in the trees overhead. He looked around as he pensively chewed, struggling still to remember what Makoto meant. Had they been there together? Alone? Was it once a favorite hangout? A place for special occasions?
“That dolphin show?” he repeated, looking back at Makoto with one eyebrow raised in question. The memory of that was still fresh and he recounted with a chuckle, “You pulled me into the bathroom with you and I had to buy that octopus shirt after you cried all over me.” He took another bite and swallowed. “You never did tell me why you were crying… I just thought you hated dolphins or something.”
They got on the train and, thankfully, Yoshiko released the deathgrip she had on his finger once her attention was taken by something else. Sousuke watched her looking out the window, amazed and in awe of everything that passed by, even things that weren’t spectacular at all. And Makoto was there with her, happily bouncing her on his knee, as he did those days. It was moments like those Sousuke wondered how he had ever thought that having a child in their lives would upend everything.
But as the train kept on, Sousuke let his eyes wander away from those two, and he caught on to a certain theme amongst the other passengers. All of them—at least a majority—wore Disney things or cartoonish things that must’ve been Disney-related. He recognized a few, like the mermaid and the girl with the frost powers, emblazoned on t-shirts.
“Disneyland?” he asked, his eyes darting back to Makoto in surprise and no small amount of confusion—not that some part of him wasn’t excited. “We’re going there?”
Makoto turned his gaze away from Yoshiko as the penny seemed to have dropped for Sousuke.
"Mhm, Disneyland. Hopefully in time for the fireworks, too," he confirmed, his smile brightening.
"Dada!" Yoshiko gurgled, bouncing her stumps legs on Makoto's legs with barely contained excitement.
"Yes! Disneyland!" Makoto cooed, keeping her stabilized with that hand on her back.
“Hm, no. It’s fine,” Makoto replied with a smile, handing Sousuke his bento. “I don’t really remember the whole thing myself, so this will be an abridged version anyway.”
He handed Sousuke a pair of chopsticks, too. “Also, we don’t have a whole day, so it’s going to be just two points. Do you want to see the dolphin show we went to when we got to know each other a deep I started bawling like a baby?” He asked, popping a few rice grains into Yoshiko’s mouth before he ate some himself.
The whole thing. Makoto’s words puzzled him, and he tossed the possibilities around in his head about what “thing” he could be referring to. He hadn’t exactly answered his question.
Sousuke held his chopsticks and carefully dug into the bento, picking up the little bits of meat and rice as a gentle breeze blew over them, rustling the leaves in the trees overhead. He looked around as he pensively chewed, struggling still to remember what Makoto meant. Had they been there together? Alone? Was it once a favorite hangout? A place for special occasions?
“That dolphin show?” he repeated, looking back at Makoto with one eyebrow raised in question. The memory of that was still fresh and he recounted with a chuckle, “You pulled me into the bathroom with you and I had to buy that octopus shirt after you cried all over me.” He took another bite and swallowed. “You never did tell me why you were crying… I just thought you hated dolphins or something.”
Sousuke stood and stretched as much as he was able to, given that Yoshiko had taken one of his fingers hostage. She didn’t seem likely to let it go any time soon, and he was content to let her keep it so long as he didn’t need it for anything.
“Another train?” Sousuke asked when he’d heard Makoto’s plan. “You’re gonna really make me go all over the city today.” He sighed. Luckily for Makoto, with his poor sense of direction, he wasn’t likely to figure out where they were headed until there was a clear sign in front of him.
Though, Makoto seemed awfully excited about… something…
“Lead the way then. Park’s closing.”
"Not as much as you made me. In that other life," Makoto mumbled with a fond smile as he adjusted the straps of Yoshiko's carrier. She bounced happily, Sousuke's finger in a death grip as she laughed and gurgled, making Makoto grin.
A little louder, he said, "Well! Let's go then!"
He led them back to the Yamanote line to ride the few stations to Tokyo station where they got off and walked along the long corridors down to where the trains towards Chiba departed. The ride to Maihama station wasn't all that long and when Makoto pointed out a few things to Yoshiko, she watched intently, pudgy fingers pressed against the window as he held her up, balancing on his leg.
He was pretty sure that by now even Sousuke would have gotten wind, with all those people with Disney accessories on their clothes and bags and the signs everywhere.
“Hm, no. It’s fine,” Makoto replied with a smile, handing Sousuke his bento. “I don’t really remember the whole thing myself, so this will be an abridged version anyway.”
He handed Sousuke a pair of chopsticks, too. “Also, we don’t have a whole day, so it’s going to be just two points. Do you want to see the dolphin show we went to when we got to know each other a deep I started bawling like a baby?” He asked, popping a few rice grains into Yoshiko’s mouth before he ate some himself.
The whole thing. Makoto’s words puzzled him, and he tossed the possibilities around in his head about what “thing” he could be referring to. He hadn’t exactly answered his question.
Sousuke held his chopsticks and carefully dug into the bento, picking up the little bits of meat and rice as a gentle breeze blew over them, rustling the leaves in the trees overhead. He looked around as he pensively chewed, struggling still to remember what Makoto meant. Had they been there together? Alone? Was it once a favorite hangout? A place for special occasions?
“That dolphin show?” he repeated, looking back at Makoto with one eyebrow raised in question. The memory of that was still fresh and he recounted with a chuckle, “You pulled me into the bathroom with you and I had to buy that octopus shirt after you cried all over me.” He took another bite and swallowed. “You never did tell me why you were crying… I just thought you hated dolphins or something.”
“Alright,” Sousuke said with a shrug, accepting for the moment that he’d find out whatever made Makoto cry that day some other time. It didn’t seem important right then.
Taking Makoto’s advice, Sousuke did enjoy his bento. He made short work of it, in fact, and soon he was playing with the last bits of it with Yoshiko, holding little pieces of veggies (that he may or may not have wanted to eat himself) just out of her reach so she would make those adorable grabby hands he loved and he could watch her face light up when he finally let her eat it. He made the little airplane noises and everything, a lovestruck grin on his face the whole time.
When their food was gone, Sousuke grabbed both empty boxes and tossed the trash into a bin. As he retook his seat beside Makoto, he asked, “Alright. So we had dinner… Now where are we going?” He looked to Yoshiko and offered her his finger to hold onto.
Sated and full, Yoshiko grabbed Sousuke's finger as she looked around and took in their surroundings.
"Mhm, we had dinner and now we'll complete the circle of the park because they're closing up soon anyway. Then we'll go back to Tokyo main station and take another train there," Makoto beamed.
It shouldn't be too much to guess to understand that he would only get this shiny eyed about Disneyland.
“Hm, no. It’s fine,” Makoto replied with a smile, handing Sousuke his bento. “I don’t really remember the whole thing myself, so this will be an abridged version anyway.”
He handed Sousuke a pair of chopsticks, too. “Also, we don’t have a whole day, so it’s going to be just two points. Do you want to see the dolphin show we went to when we got to know each other a deep I started bawling like a baby?” He asked, popping a few rice grains into Yoshiko’s mouth before he ate some himself.
The whole thing. Makoto’s words puzzled him, and he tossed the possibilities around in his head about what “thing” he could be referring to. He hadn’t exactly answered his question.
Sousuke held his chopsticks and carefully dug into the bento, picking up the little bits of meat and rice as a gentle breeze blew over them, rustling the leaves in the trees overhead. He looked around as he pensively chewed, struggling still to remember what Makoto meant. Had they been there together? Alone? Was it once a favorite hangout? A place for special occasions?
“That dolphin show?” he repeated, looking back at Makoto with one eyebrow raised in question. The memory of that was still fresh and he recounted with a chuckle, “You pulled me into the bathroom with you and I had to buy that octopus shirt after you cried all over me.” He took another bite and swallowed. “You never did tell me why you were crying… I just thought you hated dolphins or something.”
"Mhm, yeah. That one. I guess I'll tell you later... But rather than reliving that memory, I'd like us to go somewhere else later," Makoto admitted and handed Yoshiko more rice as she made grabby hands for his chopsticks.
"Enjoy your meal!" He beamed, getting a fill of his own bento. "Ah, I'm glad the weather is so nice today!"
It would definitely heighten the chances for the fireworks at Disneyland to take place.
“You’ll see,” Makoto smiled and reached out to take Sousuke’s hand. “Follow me?”
He walked Sousuke back to the train station and then led him to the Hamarikyu garden where he had been led on the tour that had led to their first engagement. On the way, he bought two bento in a convenience store so that they could have a small picnic halfway through the park.
“This place… Does this mean anything to you? I like it, because it’s a calm in the middle of the busiest part of Tokyo,” he explained with a smile as they sat on a bench. Yoshiko had woken up and Makoto fed her apple pieces.
With Makoto’s hand in his, Sousuke obediently followed. He’d have asked where they were going when they ended up getting right back onto the train, but Makoto wasn’t likely to tell him anyway, so he kept his wondering and confusion to himself.
After a small time, they ended up at a garden—Hamarikyu Garden, by the signs.
Sousuke looked around at the trees and the gazebos and the little pond, trying to find some meaning in it, some familiarity. As they sat down on a wooden bench, he knew Makoto wanted him to remember some time when they’d been there before, but, for the life of him, he couldn’t remember when or why or if he’d ever been there at all. To him, it was entirely new.
“Will it ruin the mood if I say I don’t think I’ve ever been here?” he replied, frowning at himself. He was sure he’d never become accustomed to visiting places his old self had been before, feeling like there was a ghost hovering just behind him or as if he was from some alternate reality.
He took one of the bentos and opened it for Makoto, since he was holding Yoshiko, and then opened the second for himself to begin eating. “I sort of understand why we met at the hospital, but… why this place?”
"Hm, no. It's fine," Makoto replied with a smile, handing Sousuke his bento. "I don't really remember the whole thing myself, so this will be an abridged version anyway."
He handed Sousuke a pair of chopsticks, too. "Also, we don't have a whole day, so it's going to be just two points. Do you want to see the dolphin show we went to when we got to know each other a deep I started bawling like a baby?" He asked, popping a few rice grains into Yoshiko's mouth before he ate some himself.
Sousuke had been standing outside for only a minute, debating whether or not to go in, when the front doors of the hospital slid apart and Makoto hurried out with Yoshiko in her carrier strapped to his chest, as per usual.
He breathed a little sigh of relief.
Grinning affectionately, he accepted the offered Cola, saying, “Thanks.” And he leaned closer to press a gentle kiss to Yoshiko’s sleepy head.
She made a scrunched-up face and went right back to sleeping soundly.
Sousuke cracked open the Cola and took a sip. “Why’d I have to meet you at the hospital?” he asked of Makoto, meaning no ill will by it, and he wiped a bit of sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. “You could’ve given me a Cola at home too,” he teased.
"You'll see," Makoto smiled and reached out to take Sousuke's hand. "Follow me?"
He walked Sousuke back to the train station and then led him to the Hamarikyu garden where he had been led on the tour that had led to their first engagement. On the way, he bought two bento in a convenience store so that they could have a small picnic halfway through the park.
"This place... Does this mean anything to you? I like it, because it's a calm in the middle of the busiest part of Tokyo," he explained with a smile as they sat on a bench. Yoshiko had woken up and Makoto fed her apple pieces.
Makoto patted Yoshiko's back as he left a letter on Sousuke's bag before he told him that he would go home first. The letter read: "Meet us at the hospital where we first met. We've got a surprise... Happy Birthday!" He didn't have a plan as bug as Sousuke had had, but he wanted to propose properly this time and not just as a joke.
It was a long day at work, but with so many of their students in school again they had to start lessons later in the day. Usually, he got to work around lunch time and didn’t leave until well after his stomach was growling for dinner. That day was no different.
When Makoto announced he was going home with Yoshiko, Sousuke had nodded and waved him farewell, thinking nothing of it. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence. It was always Sousuke’s classes that went the latest and Yoshiko needed a place to rest and eat peacefully, away from all the shouts and whistles and splashes.
Thus, when he found a carefully penned note on his bag as he readied to go, he was caught rather by surprise.
“Oh… Is it my birthday?” he asked aloud to no one in particular. Makoto was better at remembering those things and it wasn’t as if he’d thirty-two years of birthdays stored in his memory, only two, and he hadn’t celebrated during either of them at all.
Nonetheless, he followed the clue to the “hospital where they first met.” It took some time to get there from across town on the train.
When he arrived, worn and somewhat confused by what Makoto could have planned for him at a hospital, he looked around the entrance for a sign of what to do next. Was he meant to go inside? He wondered.
Because it was pretty humid that day, Makoto chose to wait inside the hospital's lobby. Yoshiko was also doing much better in her carrier there since she wasn't a big fan of hot and humid weather. He nursed a bottle of soda, checking his clock and the outside every now and then until he saw the familiar hairdo of his husband. He smiled as he fingered the velvet box in his pants' pocket, vowing to do this right this time around.
He got up and hurried outside, holding a bottle of ice-cold Cola against Sousuke's bare arm.
"Hey! I see you got my message... Happy Birthday," he smiled and leaned up for a quick kiss. "I'm sure Yoshiko would say the same thing, if not for the fact that she's fast asleep."
He chuckled as he held up the toddler's hand in greeting.
At least Makoto could see things clearly. This Haru friend of his, Sousuke decided, was going to be an obstacle if he didn’t shape up. Sousuke wouldn’t let anything get in the way of Makoto’s success; not after years of searching for him and so many promises made.
He turned and grabbed some of the finally finished fish from the grill, each on little plates, and set them down before Makoto and Haru. Makoto’s had ten fish while Haru’s had three, but that was correct portioning for creatures of their size. It was probably less than Makoto was accustomed to eating at the aquarium, and Sousuke could see Nagisa’s brows upturned with some concern and sympathy, but Makoto would have to live with it and work hard if he wanted to make any progress.
“You can whine all you want,” Sousuke allowed with a stern nod as he set the plates down and took a step back to sit on the side of the boat. He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, looking serious. “But I won’t let you fail.”
Makoto looked down at the plate that he was handed with a rather pitiful expression, more used to meal sizes three times that big. He looked up at Sousuke, trying to convince him with puppy eyes to give him more, but then again, he had already snacked on a fish earlier, so maybe he had already cheated too much.
“Thank you,” Makoto said earnestly then. “Thanks for the meal!”
“Thank you for the food,” Haru said as well, kicking his tail in annoyance. He didn’t really like being told off. Especially not when he was just trying to help out his friend.
For once, Sousuke didn’t argue. Even he could admit that the idea of traversing stairs in his condition was less than exciting and he had no desire to collapse in the basement and require Makoto to drag him back up like some pathetic thing. As if he wasn’t pathetic enough already.
He stood on shaking legs, his hands on the walls and the broken furniture for support as he slowly made his way around the ground floor of the little house. Clearly, others had taken shelter there before, from the pile of torn food wrappers and the disturbed patterns of dust on the creaky wooden floor. Perhaps they’d been runaways like himself.
He paused in what must have once been a kitchen to catch his breath, leaning heavily on the remaining counter top as he looked around, feeling the sun on his face from the window that faced the treeline. There were some heavy curtains there; moth-eaten and dusty, but thicker than lace that he’d seen before. He was just reaching for them, intending to tug them down from the rod, when Makoto appeared, blankets in hand.
His hand fell back to his side and he gave Makoto a tired nod. “Yeah. For one night,” he agreed, pushing himself away from the counter and the empty spot where a fridge had once been and starting back to the entryway. He looked to the stairs that led up to the second floor and he said, “Could be beds up there, though…” There could be pillows and blankets even mattresses to sleep on, instead of some wooden floor and dusty blankets from the basement. He could make it up the stairs if that was waiting for him, but he couldn’t be the one to check.
“I’ll go and check. Don’t move,” Makoto said and pressed a kiss to Sousuke’s cheek. He put the blankets on a lone counter in what used to be a kitchen, and then hurried upstairs to check if there were any beds. After what he had seen, he highly doubted that what he was about to find was better than the bed that they had found the night after they had run away, but at least a mattress would be fine.
He did find a bed, however, the mattress inside was only a frame for the springs inside and Makoto made a face. He found a comforter at last, so he took that and carried it downstairs as well.
“The bed is.... well, more a collection of springs than anything,” Makoto said, smiling sheepishly. “Let’s lie down on this though.”
He held up the comforter with another smile, feeling less triumphant over his find than he thought he would.
Sousuke lingered in place after that quick kiss, watching Makoto walk to the living room area to sit on the couch, a picture of a happy father with his baby in arms. He’d never seen Makoto like that. A stupid grin had spread across his face before he could stop it and he turned and went for the dirty dishes before anyone might suspect that he was actually smiling.
Dishes didn’t take long. They never did. Sousuke didn’t use an excess amount when he cooked and there were only the two of them. Well, only two of them used adult-sized dishes. He washed out some of the empty bottles and nipples that had come in the duffel bag with hot water and left them out on the counter. He figured they should be in a place they’d be easy to grab if their new little monster got hungry at night.
When all was done, the table cleared, and the lights dimmed, Sousuke joined Makoto on the couch. He picked up Maruko and set her on his lap as he took her spot and pressed himself against Makoto’s side, draping an arm around his shoulders as he joined in staring down at their sleeping bundle. He didn’t say a word, not willing to break the delicate spell.
Makoto looked up when he felt the other’s arm on his shoulders, smiling happily.
“Hey,” he said softly, leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek. “She’s... she’s been sleeping all this time and all I could think of was just how amazing she is,” he confessed, shaking his head in disbelief. “I hope it stays that way, but I can... I already feel how tired we will be later on, when she cries through the night with a full diaper and all of that.”
He smiled down again. “But I don’t mind. As long as she’s happy.”
Neither of them, it seemed, could look at one another. Haru looked down at the water in the glass in his hand and Makoto stared off somewhere else, the pregnant silence between them so tangible Haru could have cut it with a knife.
A strange thing. Makoto called it a strange thing. Haru wondered if it was a strange thing. Perhaps if he was strange enough, than a normal thing was strange to him. He’d always been told he was a bit strange; it had never bothered him before. Makoto liked him just as he was. Just where he was. But that wasn’t the scariest thing.
What had terrified him more than what Makoto had said between them in that dark room was that he felt the same.
He thought of Makoto leaving him or disappearing from his life forever and his stomach churned. When he tried to imagine what might happen when they graduated and his chest seized up, his breath caught in his throat. What cruel fortune did he have that his two greatest fears might be related?
Makoto’s fingers touched his own and he finally glanced up, staring at the deep sea of green that didn’t star back. A gentle shiver ran down his spine as those same fingers drifted to his spine and then danced down and Makoto’s lips touched tiny kisses to his warm, bruised skin. He was so gentle, Haru wondered if Makoto thought he would break.
Haru set down his glass and he lifted a hand, running it through Makoto’s hair, and he tilted his head to the side, giving him his unspoken permission and encouragement. Mark me, he thought. Kiss me, take me, do what you want. Just don’t leave.
Makoto wasn’t pushed away, instead there was encouragement to do more. But more wasn’t exactly what Makoto wanted to do, he wanted to make things better. He wanted Haru to feel again. Not in the brutal king of way where everything was too much, but in the other way, where he couldn’t get enough at all.
He pressed more kisses to Haru’s shoulders before he turned him around, holding his gaze for a moment, cupping his jaw before he leaned in for a gentle kiss.
