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full time human, part time mermaid

@idlerwheel / idlerwheel.tumblr.com

some people call me wendy
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tough year to be a game of thrones and veronica mars fan and whatever other depressing ass content is out there, iā€™m sure thereā€™s lots.

like... why have emotionally satisfying resolutions to any storylines that have been carefully and wonderfully written for literal years? lol why do that when they can just shock the viewers for the hell of it? sacrificing years of build-up for dumbass reasons.

am i becoming that millennial thatā€™s about to blame capitalism for everything? because i will. all about them ratings imo. and like, duh, i know tragedy in storytelling has been around since the beginning of storytelling but like i really do feel like itā€™s a trend lately to be as bleak as fucking possible. but maybe thatā€™s because we are living in a bleak world and so everything just feels extra darksided.Ā 

either way, not gonna care about any fictional characters ever again. iā€™m over it!

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MICROSOFT EXCEL

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whihumph

She did an interview on @thisistheread . They asked her about it. She didnā€™t even know what Microsoft Excel was.

can we just discuss how theres excel in a phone way back 2002?

She was making a spreadsheet for the amount of times he never responded to her text.

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idlerwheel

this is funny but my friend recently sent me an article that was likeĀ ā€œthe hottest chat app for teens is google docs~ā€, so like... maybe google just saw this video back in the day and it inspired them to make google drive where you can just be updating your spreedsheet with ur friends/enemies in real time. thanks kelly rowland for my gdrive rights.Ā 

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Brienne did NOT always want to be a Kingsguard

Before yā€™all start romanticizing this shit ending they gave her, a friendly reminder that BRIENNE DID NOT DREAM TO BE A KINGSGUARD ALL HER LIFE!

She became a Kingsguard FOR RENLY because she loved him and thought that was the best she could hope for given who she was. She served people because she thought she was unsuited to be a lady and heir to her father. She chose her life based on the assumption that she was unworthy of love.

The show glossed all over that and essentially confirmed the reasoning that an ugly, mannish, mulish womanā€™s best conceivable ending is to end up sworn into a celibate order for life, and write down her own painful rejection in the White Book.

D&D never gave a shit about Brienneā€™s arc, so Iā€™m not surprised they probably donā€™t even know or understand or care about her backstory. But this is why this ending (and Jaimeā€™s as well) is a fucking travesty.

To paraphrase Aerys: fuck them all.

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reblogged

a(n amateur) supercut of moira rose screaming (and sometimes just shouting/being extra), from season one of schittā€™s creek.

season two. seasons three and four are forthcoming.

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chickren
Anonymous asked:

Do you think the books will end this way as well? I just canā€™t see how theyā€™d get to this point specifically with Jaimeā€™s character, no matter how much GRRM explains it. Especially leaving Brienne like that, sleeping with her knowing that heā€™s going to leave her for Cersei immediately afterwards.

Do I think it will end that way for Jaime and Brienne in the books? No.

I think D&D are using GRRMā€™s plot points without any of his context, and sometimes with the wrong characters, and in the wrong order.Ā 

Brienne and Jaime are hit by four massive deviations:

  1. Their current Riverlands/Vale/wherever (Stoneheart?) arc was dropped.
  2. Sansaā€™s arc was altered. :/
  3. Cersei as final big bad in the books? Laughable. I think itā€™s much more likely to be (f)Aegon.
  4. The Night King in the books is a mythical/historical figure, and I donā€™t think there will be one central defeatable character to stop the threat of the Others. For that reason, I would be very surprised if the fight against the Others is wrapped as easily.

If I had to guess the Brienne and Jaime plot points that GRRM shared with D&D, they were probably:

  • Jaime and Brienne start banging
  • Brienne (maybe both of them) finds/helps Sansa
  • Jaime valonqars Cersei
  • Jaime & Brienne fight in the final battle against the Others

How their show story played out:

Game of Thrones overpowered Cersei for far longer than George will. This combined with the elimination of Jaime and Brienneā€™s post-Dance storyline meant that D&D were left to invent stories for both of them (although I wouldnā€™t be surprised if they both end up with Sansa), that did not include one another when they should have.Ā 

As a result, Jaime was left to circle Cerseiā€™s orbit, subservient to her storyline, for far longer than he should have. They apparently found it easier to keep him from breaking up with her in order to make that believable, eliminating his discovery of her infidelity and leaving him in a state of arrested development with regard to their relationship that they only visited occasionally (in minor ways) when they needed some drama.

No disagreements between Jaime and Cersei were allowed to be serious enough for him to actually break ties with her. Partly because he was a useful tool in the plot they invented for Cersei once she seized the throne in her own right, and partly because they didnā€™t have anything else relevant to the plot for him to do. They were clearly just keeping him around for the final fight against the Night King. Brienne meanwhile did eventually find and serve Sansa (book plot point).

So we reach Season 8, and they send Jaime off to battle the Night King (book plot point), decide they may as well finally have him get with Brienne (book plot point), after all they laid the groundwork for their relationship starting in Season 2. Then once thatā€™s all over, Jaime has to get back to KL to die with Cersei, probably because they couldnā€™t bear to have him valonqar her, if I had to guess. That is most likely a result of their intense fascination with their show version of her character.

How I suspect their book story will play out:

Jaime and Brienne (currently together in the Riverlands or wherever in the books) will play out whatever their Winds+ storyline is, which they definitely both survive. They will then part ways with Jaime returning to deal with Cersei and however many of their kids are still alive, and Brienne doing whatever with Sansa (taking her to Jon? idk). I would not be at all surprised if they start banging before they separate, but who knows.

JaimeĀ ā€œdealsā€ with Cerseiā€“possibly at KL, possibly at Casterly Rockā€“and probably ends up killing her or causing her death. I believe he outlives her (weirwood stump dream, lights). Jaime, probably with Widowā€™s Wail in hand, then joins Brienne and everyone else for the final battle in the North (and also has his long awaited Tyrion reunion). I believe Jaime dies in battle against the Others. Brienne lives in the books too, or I eat my hat.

The difference between the book and show Jaime/Brienne relationship:

Brienne and Jaime are written as soulmates in the books. Everything about their arcs is made to fit together like two sides of a zipper. Georgeā€™s big joke is that itā€™s Cersei and Jaime who talk and look like soulmates, when itā€™s actually Brienne and Jaime who in every conceivable way complement one another.Ā 

Jaime and Cerseiā€™sĀ ā€œromanceā€ is a satirical send up like Romeo and Juliet, made to mock the silliest elements of typical melodramatic tragic love. Itā€™s at the center of Jaimeā€™s origin story, but theirs is not the story GRRM is telling in the books. I say again:Ā 

There is a reason Jaime doesnā€™t need a pov until he meets Brienne.

The imagery in Jaimeā€™s weirwood stump dream of Cersei and her light leaving him while Brienneā€™s lit sword is the only thing standing between him and death is, to me, as clear as an author can be without flat out stating intended plot points about where ALL of that is headed.

If you thinkā€“for one momentā€“that Jaime and Brienne are not one anotherā€™s great loves in the books, you have failed utterly to interpret the narrative. Did GRRM assume that D&D would understand that the plot point ofĀ ā€œJaime and Brienne start bangingā€ meant that they were consummating their soul deep love? Probably. Did D&D totally not pay any real attention to Jaimeā€™s pov ever and probably never do anything but have their interns write summaries for Feast and Dance? Probably.Ā 

They clearly know JB is a love story, but in their minds Cersei is the center of the Westeros universe and it would be inconceivable for Jaime not to feel exactly the same way about her that they do.Ā And hey, Jaime always will love Cersei in a way in the books, but I absolutely do not believe that love will ever EVER be to the exclusion of Brienne.Ā 

If you never really read Jaimeā€™s Feast and Dance chapters, you might not understand exactly how far Jaime has moved on emotionally. I think they heard the plot point ā€œJaime valonqars Cerseiā€ and just decided, oh tragic love! And I really do think thatā€™s the explanation. Jaime and Brienneā€™s romance being the big central thing for Jaimeā€™s character did not fit their version of Cerseiā€™s story, and just did not compute with their understanding of his character.

(And never underestimate how much they really may have wanted to stick it to Nikolaj for harassing them for years about when they were finally going to portray Jaimeā€™s real book story and love affair with Brienne. We know George told Gwendoline that Jaime and Brienne were his Beauty and the Beast. I have no doubt GRRM told Nikolaj the same. No wonder he kept playing Jaime toward that ultimate end.)

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Iā€™m sorry, but the idea that this was foreshadowed is bullshit. For every one instance in the show or books that can be construed as ā€œmadness,ā€ there are three that show Daenerysā€™s compassion, good heart, and better nature win out.

If they wanted a ā€œMad Queenā€¦ā€ who hates bellsā€¦ Cersei is right there.

At the sound of the ringing bells, Cersei remembers her walk of shame, and how she promised to make Kingā€™s Landing pay for the way they mocked and jeered her.

Alsoā€¦ Cersei never gave the order to surrender. You think sheā€™d be just good with someone overriding her authority and surrendering for her? Cersei? The woman who pulled off the murder of her husband, the framing of Margaery Tyrell, and blew up a Sept?

These writers decided, in one episode, made the decision to have Daenerys and Cersei switch places, a move that makes no narrative sense because there has been no build up to it.

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