Absolutely me

The only white guy in the office after black panther

LMFAOOOO KEV AND THIS ACCENT

Tahir at the end

INFINITY WAR SPOILER

me: Loki can’t die- maybe he fake how did he die i don’t understand why

friend: because Thanos went *squish*

me: thoR GoT BLOWN UP, FLOATED AROUND IN A SPACE WRECK, HAD A STAr mAKE HIM INTO A CRISPY BEEFCAKE

me: and you’re telling me

me: Loki suffocated

IT’s JuSt SiMpLe CaLcUluS.

Death comes for Minerva McGonagall.

It comes for her, as it came for her husband, so many years ago. It comes for her, as it came for her Headmaster, the price of his ambition. It comes for her, as it came for far too many of her friends and students, in one war then another.

Death comes for her.

Minerva McGonagall Looks at Death, and raises an eyebrow.

Death pauses, then nods and backs away. “We’ll call this number three then, shall we?”

She smiles as she turns back to her paperwork. There is a reason her animagus form is a cat.

my kids: dad what’s for supper? me: ooh hunny i am serving looks tonight kids: we haven’t eaten in 3 days

—

A.d.c

(via thelovenotebook)

—

Unknown

(via thelovenotebook)

why can’t my pores be as tight as my p*ssy

   I just drove my uncle and myself to the hardware store, and he said to me “Molly, I want you to know that being Catholic doesn’t change anything. If you someday get married, your wife will be welcome in this family. Don’t ever think otherwise.”

  That is really nice, but I am not gay???

I’M LAUGHING SO HARD. SPOILER ALERT 2012 ME; YOU’RE SUPER FRICKING GAY.

cute date idea

we go to an aquarium. you point out all the fish you like. i jump in the tank and attempt to fight them to win your affection

ᴰᵉᶜᵉᵖᵗᶦᵛᵉ ᴸᶦᵖˢ