please read this storify about a journalist who accidentally got added to a group dm on twitter with a bunch of teenage girls and also edward snowden

“Hahaha. You guys are the best, but yeah. The FBI does have a warrant on me, so you might not want to include me in yours DMs unless you want them to have copies of them. Stay free out there.” 

-Political asylant and internationally renowned whistleblower Edward Snowden, to a group of teenage girls

Money spell! Reblog to charge it with your intent; the more people see it, the more powerful it becomes. Magic should be fun!

NOW THIS MONEY POST I AM HERE FOR

this actually does work the witches of tumblr really are out here doing something lol

well it better work or else I’m gonna cry I need to make rent h0e

Yesss November come throughhhhhhh!!

This is money cat. He only appears every 1,383,986,917,198,001 posts. If you repost this in 30 seconds he will bring u good wealth and fortune.

Lol it’s too cute not to share. Besides..what if i become a millionaire tomorrow. 

new blog deleting this one soon message me for the url <3

Steven Universe - old theme vs. new theme

Character development.

1. Steven interrupts the gems and they’re surprised to see him there -> Steven is a core part of the gems and they’re excited to have him there.

2. Steven basically falls over when the gems teleport -> Steven controls the teleporter.

3. Steven is excited about the future but irritated when he’s treated like a child -> The hair-rumpling is now a teammate thing, and Steven is as excited about that as much as anything else.

4. Steven tags along with the gems as they rush into battle with their weapons -> Steven summons his shield and fights alongside them

5. Connie is a dumbfounded outsider looking on in awe -> MUTHAFUCKING SWORDMASTER CONNIE MAHESWARAN 

6.Greg jumps in with a grill, ecstatic that he gets to spend some time with his son -> Greg is chilling with Lion and is comfortable with his son’s ridiculous world.

7.The gems individually -> The gems as a family.

So I was rereading Harry Potter, when I came across this and thought- what if instead of Cedric Diggory, Cassius Warrington had been chosen to compete in the Triwizard Tournament?

Imagine Dumbledore calling out the name of the Hogwarts champion and it isn’t a Gryffindor, or a Ravenclaw, or even a Hufflepuff, but it’s a Slytherin. A student from a House most people hate.

Imagine Cassius Warrington getting up, and three out of four Houses are booing at him and shouting things like “NO!” or, “We can’t have a Slytherin champion!” or demanding a retry. But he’s a Slytherin- he’s been dealing with this shit since he got sorted, so he keeps his head high and joins the other champions.

Imagine Harry trying to catch Warrington alone because he doesn’t really want to associate with Slytherins (plus Malfoy has this tendency of being around the guy ALL THE TIME since he got chosen), but at the same time he’s also fair enough not to want him to walk into the first task unprepared.

Imagine Warrington walking over to Harry a few months later, and Ron and Hermione both jump into a protective stance, wands out, but instead of attacking Harry he just tells him to stick the egg underwater. (Because Slytherins don’t forget those who helped them out).

Imagine Warrington and Harry helping each other out in the labyrinth.

Imagine Harry being devastated when Peter kills Warrington- because Voldemort doesn’t care what house they’re form, a spare is a spare.

Imagine the uproar that causes among the Slytherins, because some of their parents really are Death Eaters and they know what really happened.

Imagine Slytherins fighting in the Battle of Hogwarts and shouting “This is for Cassius!”

Imagine Harry returning with Warrington’s body, and the crowd realizes what’s happened, but Warrington’s parents don’t show up. There’s no one to mourn him, to cradle him in their arms and cry for their son. The Slytherins know why. His parents were Death Eaters, too.

Imagine Slytherins reaching out, asking for help from classmates from other houses. They’re terrified, truly terrified because the being their parents claimed would never hurt them because they’re pureblood, they realize that he does not care.

Imagine Slytherins in the 5th book sneaking off to join Dumbledore’s Army, to learn more about who Voldemort is without their parents acting as a filter. 

Imagine the shock when they’re told what he’s really done.

Imagine that a few talented Slytherins went with Harry and the others into the Ministry of Magic. The others are a bit wary but they prove themselves as friends.

Imagine them being confronted by Lucius Malfoy in the the Hall of Prophecy, and when the Death Eaters descend, they know that any one of them could be their parents.

Imagine the shocked gasp of a Death Eater as they realize their own child, a pureblood, is standing defiantly with Harry Potter. They choke back a cry. They can’t let their child know that they were about to duel to the death.

Imagine a DA Slytherin facing off against their own Death Eater parent. That they make the decision to let their child defeat them, because in that moment, they realize that they love their child more than they fear Voldemort. They go down, mask unveiled, and the Slytherin kid has to be dragged from the fight before he gets killed.

Imagine Book 6 Slytherins getting more friendly and cooperative with the other houses. Two years of Voldemort terrorizing the muggle and Wizarding world, two years where their parents just up and leave some days, cringing from the pain in their arm, two years after the death of the first Slytherin pureblood, Cassius Warrington, killed by Voldemort’s right-hand man, and they’re slowly hitting the breaking point.

Imagine Slytherin kids keeping tabs on their parents, sending the information to Harry, who shares it with the Order of the Phoenix, and hoping that their parents won’t be killed.

Imagine Book 7 Slytherins low-key rebelling against the new oppressive Hogwarts staff.

Imagine the final seige on Hogwarts, where Slytherins stand proudly by their fellow houses, knowing full-well they could be fighting their own parents. Some Slytherins know their parents were in the fighting. They hope to find them first and sneak them away. Their fellow students understand. Professor McGonagall allows 7th Year Slytherin, Pansy Parkinson, to duel a death eater in her stead; her father is under that veil. She knows it.

Imagine the aftermath of the battle; every house suffered loses. Slytherin students crying over the deaths of friends they made in every house.

Imagine a Cassius Warrington statue made in his honor, the first Slytherin to fight and die nobly with Harry Potter, the boy who lived, in the face of ultimate evil. He was a true Slytherin, and its in his name that Slytherin children and their families have cut all ties with the Death Eaters, denounced Voldemort, and are finally living in peace.

This is the best freaking post I have ever seen in my life

I am all about stories where the hero and villain know each other very well and were once friends, but I could deal with it being used another way.

What if instead of being used for drama, for wistfulness and pleas to join the other side, it was more like the hero looking over a battlefield going Seriously, who does she think she’s kidding, she’s been using the same chess strategy since we were seven or the villain picking a headquarters in a specific climate because she knows the hero hates hot weather or deciding Send in some forces to round up all the copies of his favorite poet’s work, that’ll tick him off.

Or most of all them still having inside jokes with each other.

#the forces on either side wear uniforms the color that the other one cant stand #makes sure to stop the import of their favorite candies. like all other food and stuff can pass. just not THOSE candies #’DID YOU KIDNAP MY CAT?!’ ‘Yeah. He’s a sweetheart. Can I keep him?’ ‘GIVE ME BACK MY CAT.’ ‘Yeah ok.’ #sends cat back with a bow and ‘next time don’t keep your key in the same place you did when we were room mates dumbass’ #’Ma’am…the enemy has sent over a…a turkey?’ ‘…That mother fucker HE WAS SUPPOSED TO NEVER MENTION IT AGAIN. THAT’S IT. SEND HIM A FUCK#ING GOAT HE’S TERRIFIED OF THEM

things me and bats have in common

-smol -try to be scary but get scared by everything -bad vision -runs into walls often -awake at night -likes fruit -confused

-screams to communicate

when did tumblr collectively decide not to use punctuation like when did this happen why is this a thing

it just looks so smooth I mean look at this sentence flow like a jungle river

ACTUALLY

This is really exciting, linguistically speaking.

Because it’s not true that Tumblr never uses punctuation. But it is true that lack of punctuation has become, itself, a form of punctuation. On Tumblr the lack of punctuation in multisentence-long posts creates the function of rhetorical speech, or speech that is not intended to have an answer, usually in the form of a question. Consider the following two potential posts. Each individual line should be taken as a post:

ugh is there any particular reason people at work have to take these massive handfuls of sauce packets they know they’re not going to use like god put that back we have to pay for that stuff

Ugh. Is there any particular reason people at work have to take these massive handfuls of sauce packets they know they’re not going to use? Like god, put that back. We have to pay for that stuff.

In your head, those two potential posts sound totally different. In the first one I’m ranting about work, and this requires no answer. The second may actually engage you to give an answer about hoarding sauce packets. And if you answer the first post, you will likely do so in the same style. 

Here’s what makes this exciting: the English language has no actual punctuation for rhetorical speech–that is, there are no special marks that specifically indicate “this speech is in the abstract, and requires no answer.” Not only that, it never has. The first written record of English (actually proto-English, predating even Old English) dates to the 400s CE, so we’re talking about 1600 years of having absolutely no marker whatsoever for rhetorical speech.

A group of teens and young adults on a blogging website literally reshaped a deficit a millennium and a half old in our language to fit their language needs. More! This group has agreed on a more or less universal standard for these new rules, which fits the definition of “language.” Which is to say Tumblr English is its own actual, real, separate dialect of the English language, and because it is spoken by people worldwide who have introduced concepts from their own languages into it, it may qualify as a written form of pidgin. 

Tumblr English should literally be treated as its own language, because it does not follow the rules of any form of formal written English, and yet it does have its own consistent internal rules. If you don’t think that’s cool as fuck then I don’t even know what to tell you.

Hey cool

steven universe + text posts

I JUST REALLY LOVE HOW MUCH VIDALIA LOVES HER KIDS??? ESPECIALLY ONION??? LIKE SHE LOVES ONION SHE DOESNT THINK HE’S WEIRD AND SHES SO ACCEPTING OF THE WAYS HER SONS EXPRESS THEMSELVES AND IM JUST VERY HAPPY

I’m so over boring leftist antagonization of any attention we pay to pop culture. 

Nobody’s out here pretending Nicki’s the modern day Assata Shakur or that she also doesn’t come with her set of shortcomings or that her place in Hollywood inhibits just how “radical” she can be or that her place as a relatively wealthy black woman doesn’t insulate her from some of the more severe consequences of antiblackness. Nuance is definitely a thing. But the ways in which black women in the entertainment industry are continuously erased, dismissed and vilified is a microcosm of what happens to all black women everyday, in various spaces. 

The misogynoir Nicki faces is the misogynoir black women in academia, employment settings, activist spaces and daily interactions face. And its particularly upsetting to watch it play out in front of the world with venomous comments about a black woman being the trending topic on social media circuits for a day, perhaps longer. The patronization and gaslighting Nicki faced today is something every black woman can relate to and there’s nothing reactionary about addressing that.