I AM IRON MAN.
“Sorry! I just knew what the metal was. Ummm, I’d love to get out of your buisness, but right now my business is your business.” He wasn’t nervous, just…excited? Tony Stark was famous for his tech, making sure that those who were less fortunate couldnget it at a reasonable for them price, while still charging through the nose for others who could afford it.
“How would you know what my business is?” Stane may have been dealt with, but he still had many associates that were part of the plot to assassinate Howard and Maria Stark. Tony was going to hunt down each and every one of them, and no Jedi would get in his way. The only place this crime lord was going was to whatever hell they worshiped.
“Beskar’gam,” Tony corrected reflexively. How did he even know what it was? “You can help by staying out of my business.” He was going to say something sharper and ruder but he was thrown off kilter by the frank appraisal of his armor. He knew it was expensive to outsiders, but Tony’s buir was a metalsmith so he got it on the family discount so to speak. But the Jedi didn’t need to stare at it.
same bullshit energy
There’s a volcano with a ‘hazardous eruption imminent’ warning tacked on it near me so I might be freaking out too bad to do anything on here okay? okay.
“Dude, we get an alien invasion per year.”
“I’m not denying that but three days? Really? And even if that happened I will be sitting here on my ass while the kids save the planet.” Probably.
“Three days if there’s an alien invasion… Again.”
“Hey now, let’s not tempt fate. Murphy’s a bitch. You should know that by now.”
“Oh shush, Tony.” He couldn’t help the huge grin any more. “Peter is awesome, and I’ll happily help the kid in whatever he needs. And Morgan was adorable, ten of ten would babysit.” The offer to set up a fund for his kids stopped him in his tracks, Tony’s generosity once again on display. “I can’t ask ya to do that, man. I got enough saved up, between Laur and I, ta put everyone through school. And besides, Coop got at least a fourth of this year paid for through scholarships anyway.”
“Good! That’s good! But if you ever need it, it’s there, so no worries, alright?” He bumped his shoulder against Clints’, “Though I might take up your offer of babysitting Morgan sometime, just so you know.” Tony smiled at Clint, only joking a little. Clint didn’t have things at his farm that would blow up if messed by a precocious child genius... hopefully.
@starkmadscientist continued from here.
“Retired? I don’t believe you, you don’t retire.”
“Granted the last few times I’ve tried to declare myself retired didn’t work out so well, but I’m sticking with it now, I swear!”
“Whatever it is, I didn’t do it. I’m retired.”
“You’re like, the fifth person to call my kiddo’s chicks. Why. Why does everyone make dumb chicken jokes?” Honestly, Laura started the whole thing, but semantics. She can, she helped make them, in the first place. “Coop’s going to college this fall, Lila is a softmore in high school, and Nate is gonna be ten in—Geesh, two? Yeah, two months. Got more horses. Few more cows. You?”
“Only the fifth? Color me shocked. You know you set yourself up with it with your bird obsession.” Tony tilted his head in thought, “I probably have a few horses somewhere, doubt I have cows, my kids are giving my grey hairs grey hairs between Peter's heroics and Morgan’s getting to that age where she’s scheming to sneak into my workshop.” A pause, “You know if you needed it, I wouldn’t mind setting up a fund for your kids, right?”
“You wouldn’t know what relaxation was if it bit you in the face, and held on for dear life, don’t even play like that.” Raising an eyebrow, he snorts, giving Stark the ‘yeah right’ look. “you’re a chronic work-a-haulic, and if you’re not doing something with your hands, I think you’ll spontaneously combust sometimes.”
“Doing something with my hands is my relaxation!” Tony flutters his hands exaggeratedly, “I do agree that I’d spontaneously combust if I sit still too long, though. Too many thoughts running around my genius brain.” He shoves his hands into his pockets, “But as much as I love talking about myself, tell me what’s going on in Hawkland. Chicks ready to leave the nest?”
“Just don’t get a golden Pizza, and I think we’ll be alright.” Clint snorts, rolling his eyes. “That last bit is entirely your fault, ya know. What, did you tell Pepper to keep quiet from everyone, or something?”
“Point of fact, I don’t actually like eating gold. I have enough metals floating in my guts.” He taps pointedly on his chest. “And I said I was mostly dead, not all intact. So, no, I’d love to announce my triumphant survival, but Pepper seems to think I could use the quiet to recuperate. She thinks I can’t take it easy, can you honestly believe that? I totally can relax on my own!”
“You found a good kid for New York.” Grinning, Clint stood up, pulling on his hoodie. “I think this calls for celebratory Pizza, what’da ya say? My treat.”
“Treating me? That’s not something I hear often.” Tony shrugs, “Sure, why not? Not like I have things to do while everyone thinks I’ve died again.” He slips on his sunglasses. “At least I won’t be recognized since I am ‘dead’.”
“BECAUSE—BECAUSE EVryone else said so, and–and it kinda seemed like it was impossible that you’d actually–.” He stopped, grinning for a moment. “Should’a known better. Only way you’d ever die for real is if you decided being alive was boring, and you wanted to see what death was like. And even then, I don’t think you’d stay dead.”
“Kicking the bucket is definitely not on my schedule for the immediate future.” He dusted some imaginary lint from his jacket. “But I think I’ll leave the super heroing to the kids now. I think I threw my hip and a few other things.”
starkmadscientist
[A message from beyond the grave!] You’re still…
“STOP LEAKING! I was just mostly dead not all dead!”
“GOOD! I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING.”
“YOU ARE! This isn’t even the third time everyone thought I was dead why are you starting to believe it now?”