rip vine

GHOST CREDIT

@johnpaulbrammer is a national treasure and must be protected

let me harvest dick in peace deborah

Fuck u @future me because ur probably still procrastinating ur essay dumbass 

fuck u @ past me….. u were right 

dont talk to me or my son ever again

you have been blessed by the christmas chan

like and reblog and you will prosper from the blessings of the great jackie

won’t even risk it.

I like this one best because there’s no threat to not reblogging it so even if you don’t there’s no worries but if you do then you’re gonna have an even better time.

my kids: omg you were alive when Britain left the EU?? thats something my textbooks talk about what was it like me: i was looking at memes about it

I remember once I was talking to two guys and one of them was complaining about his parents when the second chimed in. “Try having four parents!”

We automatically assumed that he had divorced parents that got remarried. He corrected us; “No, there is a plot twist. My mom and dad never got married but had me. They were going to get married, but then my dad suddenly confessed he was gay. My mom was so relieved and said that she discovered she was a lesbian and was afraid to tell him. So they stayed together in the same house for me. Then eventually both got partners. So my dad has his husband and my mom has her wife.”

And the third kid just looks down at the ground for a really long time before whispering, “That’s gay. “ 

Things I Should Be Doing

Things I Am Not Currently Doing

when u get a lousy grade even tho u studied

when u dont study and u get a good grade

get ready for a knuckle samwich chump

this is so pure

i’ve never met nicki minaj but i trust her