blood and hormones

[ sorry for the lack of activity! i'm sick and im busy with school but thanks so much for being patient! hopefully this weekend i'll update but in the mean time have a bloody vampire boy ]

[ psa my al is 6'1"  heheheh- ]

What a fucking stupid question. There's only been one human that I wanted to kill. I don't kill people for the fucking fun of it, I'm not a psychopath- I have to kill people. It's, one, how I survive and, two, if I don't kill em completely they'll come back as a vampire- which I highly doubt anyone would want to be bestowed with such a pain in the ass fate. You think I like killing people? You think I enjoy tearing people's throats out? Sure, the hunt's a thrill, but once the high dies down I just feel like shit all over again. I guess I'm just way too fucking sentimental, but devouring mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, friends- it's a trip down guilt lane, one that never ends because I'm damned to this shit life for eternity. But you know what the worst part is? I don't feel shitty because I killed people, no, not because I've orphaned kids and widowed spouses- I feel shitty because something inside of me can't help but be so fucking pleased with myself. Something inside of me has wished for this kind of freedom since childhood and if that isn't the fucking sickest thing then I don't know what is. So, I can't answer your fucking question because I've never necessarily wanted to kill humans, I just enjoy doing it. Except for her. I wanted to end her so dearly, and yet once I'd done it there was no joy; I can't wrap my head around why she was different but knowing she was dead didn't fill me with adrenalin. It filled me with something I can't put my finger on- but I never want to feel it again.

[ if I had a tablet I could make digital art that looks like this but nope sighs ]

I don't know why but I've found that it serves a purpose nonetheless; humans seem to be irrationally afraid of the dark, seeking out light wherever they can find it- whether it be a match or a lantern. They're also foolishly inquisitive. So I guess floating orbs of light tend to bring out that childish curiosity in people. But, y'know, curiosity killed the cat and, in this case, satisfaction didn't bring it back. to be honest the whole ordeal kinda makes me feel like an anglerfish--

[ sighs happily because i finally got to draw my shit head vampire. ]

askbloggeralfred replied to your post:Would u suck my dick like u sucked that garlic bro

Nope, sorry, I want your dick. On a platter. Literally. So whip it out you shrimp, I'm about to make you an example of what it's like to be castrated.

[ so ive really been wanting to make a demon (not devil-) Alfred hnn ]

I recall a face, though my memory's gotten foggy-  Blonde hair that trailed down elegantly, with a form to match said elegance, and clothes I couldn't of afforded in my wildest dreams. Something about the smell of cigarettes and lavender hits me with a pang of recollection, too, but it's gone in a second's time.  Unfortunately, I only have a fraction of a physical appearance and no name. If I did, I'd like to pay my fucking respects to the piece of shit that stole my blood and my goddamn life from me.